My Bittersweet Addiction

Verse 1:

Coils wrap around my lungs,

Chaos ensues, I can't breathe anymore,

And I'm falling. I'm falling,

Into nothing, or something,

I can't even begin to describe.

I'm breaking apart at the seams.

My wounds cry out. This feel so good to me,

It's so familiar, too familiar,

And it's thrilling, even chilling,

Until I finally find that escape.

Hook:

And this is the part where everything gets quiet.

The world fades away.

I drink in the silence,

And I'm feeling alive.

Everything comes together,

And for once I think it's okay.

Chorus:

The world could crash down around me,

And I wouldn't move an inch.

All that matters is the pain,

My bittersweet addiction,

And suddenly I'm in control,

And nothing else matters to me,

And I think I can breathe.

Verse 2:

Suddenly, it all comes to a halt

The guilt kicks in. My tears hit the floor.

My mind is weak. It hurts to speak,

Because I've given in, Let my demons win,

And now there's no turning back.

I feel myself slipping under.

I can't see the surface. Reality drowns me.

I can't escape the regret, can't fight the upset,

That fills me, and kills me,

And I think what was the point anyway?

Hook:

And this is the part where everything gets louder.

The world is blinding noise,

And my screams suffocate me,

And I'm dying inside.

It's all falling apart,

And I know it was never okay,

Chorus:

But if the world were to crash down around me,

I still wouldn't move an inch,

Because all that matters is the pain,

My bittersweet addiction,

And that's when I'm in control,

And nothing else matters to me,

And I think I can breathe,

Bridge:

And I know you want to save me,

But I want no part in recovery.

I can't do it for you,

So please don't ask me to.

Just let me go,

Let me be,

Let me want it for me,

And I promise when I do,

I'll be on the first plane back to you,

But until I find nirvana,

I'm not coming home tonight.

I just want one more chance

I just need one last chance

Chorus:

For the world to crash down around me,

And me not have to move an inch,

Because all that would matter is the pain,

My bittersweet addiction,

And then I'd be in control,

And nothing else would matter to me,

And I'd think I could breathe.