Throughout my life a light has shone in my eyes, a light that never goes away. Sometimes it shines so brightly I think it might blind me. The night does not save me, it is always their. They do not believe me, they say it's all in my head. But I see it, I know it's there. They think I'm insane, but I just know madness it not the reason for my suffering.
The light brings me images. Images of women being ravished, their bodies torn to pieces. Their blood splattered upon my face. The light is the reason for my crimes.
It was 1993, I was age twenty-five. I lived with my father, who was very ill and couldn't move out of bed. My job was to tend to him. Sometimes I needed to get away from him and the small house we lived in. To get away, I took small walks through town.
One day while I was going on one of my walks through town, I spotted the most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on. Her cheeks were like red roses, her hair chocolate brown and flowing down her back. She had a beautiful, curvy figure, my whole body was shaking from just the sight of her. How could I simply turn away from a beauty like this?
A image of the beauty, lying dead at my feet came soon. The light began shining so brightly, I could hardly make out my surroundings. But I could see her walking towards me, she had noticed me. "Hello" the beauty said. The light started shining brighter, it was burning. I could hardly respond at first.
With all my strength I tried to ignore the light and converse with her, "I-i was just wondering if you could come over my house for a chat?" I said politely.
"Of course" she said, blessing me with a warm smile. I then told her my address and the simple to directions to get there. Surprisingly, the beauty did not ask my name. Perhaps she had forgot. Nevertheless, I was relieved. I don't like telling anybody my name.
She came over that night. The beauty sat at the kitchen table, I believed she wanted something from me. The light was producing unspeakable images, burning my eyes. "Are you okay?" the beauty asked, noticing my discomfort.
"I...must..live it.." I whispered harshly. I grabbed the kitchen knife from a nearby drawer, her screams came like a beautiful song. The light was dimming! The beauty had tried to run, but I was quick to catch her. Grabbing her by the hair, I pulled back her head and slit her throat ear to ear. The blood squirted out wonderfully as she fell to the ground, her head nearly severed.
She lay dead at my feet. The light had become no more than a tiny flame. The process of dismemberment was not simple at all. But some parts I found joyful.
First, I removed her clothing and viewed that amazing body of her's. The cutting of the breasts aroused me, I wanted to feel her love. I cut open the chest so I could view her heart. The source of love. It had long stopped beating. I reached in to the chest cavity and wrapped my hands around the organ, gently pulling it from it's home. The beauty was left with nothing but a empty hole in her chest.
Blood dripped as I held the heart in my hands. Such a fascinating organ. I raised it slowly to my mouth, opening my mouth. I then sunk my teeth into the beauty's organ. I felt her love flow through me, as the blood trickled down my throat. Pulling back, I took off a small chunk. I was quick to swallow the piece of flesh, you could never imagine the warmth my body felt. She was apart of me, I had devoured her very essence.
Throughout the day I had finished dismembering the corpse. I placed most of her remains in my wardrobe, I just couldn't throw all of her away. The smell of death had filled my house. My father never noticed anything, he was no more than a vegetable after all.
She was a woman they would miss. The townsfolk had remembered me talking to her. The authority came and asked questions. "Sir, we have witnesses who remember seeing you with Ms. W-" they said, you don't need to know any part of her name. "Care if we take a look around?" they asked.
"Not at all, better check my wardrobe it's where I keep all my prized possessions" I told them.
The smell in my house defiantly bothered them. A smell that only became worse, when they reached my bedroom. They walked up to the wardrobe and I smiled, "I think you will like" They opened the wardrobe, cautiously. A sound of terror came as they saw her head resting in the wardrobe along with my other possessions. The parts of the beauty, placed in there perfectly and respectably.
Yes, they took me away.
"He said unto me, turn thee yet again and thou shalt see the greater abominations that they do" -Ezekiel 8:13
I was sentenced to die and I now await my execution. I await my death with great eagerness. The light had came back, much worse than before. I wish to die so I may be saved from the endless light.