I absently doodle on my sheet of math notes as Ms. Turner aimlessly tries to teach us about quadratics and cosines and whatnot. I had given up trying to braid and tame my messy bed head a while ago. I had drawn random pictures on myself and on the kid sitting next to me. I even managed to write a little message on the kid's neck that sits in front of me and was currently passed out. I was out of skin so I had to resort to paper, but I had nothing but my orange pen that wrote like a dream and my math notes.

I rummage through my backpack and manage to find a stack of flashcards in my Spanish folder.

And naturally I made a list.


Tall, like super super freakishly tall. Over six foot debatably six-five.

Long hair that he straightens. I don't even straighten my hair.

Lips that look kissable, but are bigger than mine. Eh.

Skinny but with a swimmers body.

Jeans that are nearly as tight as mine. They're the perfect fit though and sag just enough.

Always wears that leather belt.

Likes to wear sweaters-says he likes to be warm. I prefer the cold.

Warm big hands with ugly nails. Mine are small, cold and clammy. My nails are perfect all the time.

Smoker gums.


Can turn 'one dollar into twenty' so he's probably a drug dealer definitely a drug dealer considering that he says he can get me shrooms if I wanted some.

He smells so nice. It's the perfect scent-tobacco smoke, Hollister and his own essence.

Sleeps around.

Wants in my pants.

Constantly asks me to hang out with him.

Thinks I'm pretty.

Also thinks that I'm 'just so damn cute'.

Is thoroughly amused by my facial expressions.

His eyes are a really dark brown that's not quite as dark as his hair.

He has less of a heart than I do.

Touches my hair when I 'fall asleep' in class and doesn't think I know but I do.

Stares at me a lot.

Touches my leg, arm, torso and just about everywhere without invading boundaries.

I'm pretty sure he thinks he's smooth and charming, but he isn't.

Chances are all the sweet things and his flirting he does with me he also does with other girls.

Got expelled from his last school for cigarettes.

Went to elementary school and middle school with Tula, Naomi and a couple others.

Has awful grammar.

Used to go by Tanner James but never TJ.

His birthday is a month and a week earlier than mine.

I forgot his birthday twice.

He buys me a cake every birthday.

Kisses my on the cheek whenever he sees me or leaves me.

Got high with him a while back and he kissed me. I punched him.

Punched him a total of twelve times.

Has on more than one occasion been the guy that a girl has cheated with.

Has a strong jaw.

Very few of my friends like him.

He's a jackass, asshole, idiot, badass, bitchass manwhore and so many more things that utilize the word ass.

Is a swimmer.

Kicked of the swim team for drugs.

Honest, but not quite as honest as I am.


Puts me in a bad mood more often than not.

Tells me a lot of things.

Tells me things I don't want to hear.

Answers all the questions I ask.

Parent status unknown.

Hates his mother and calls her a whore…

Father is in another country.

Has an older brother four years his senior.

Fights with his brother physically and verbally.

I also get this feeling around him.

I'd love to have sex with him and wouldn't regret it.

He makes me feel wanted and physically attractive.

He smells my hair.

He likes to walk me places.

Often times he wants me to drive him places.

Often times I shut him down.

Nine-tenths of the time I'm so mean to him.

Nine-tenths of the time he finds it endearing.

I repeatedly click my orange pen and chew on it failing to find more things to list about Tanner Collis.

I shrug and decide to make a different list.


A couple inches taller than me.

Dark hair and eyes and a nice Greek tan.

Not tall enough to be considered tall, dark and handsome.

Cute but not quite handsome.

His jeans aren't nearly as tight but aren't baggy. More so slim jeans.

Also swims.

Didn't get kicked off the team for drugs.

Plays video games and I often play with him.

My friends love him.

Likes to see me a lot.

Makes an effort to see me.

Makes me laugh.

Puts me in a good mood.

Is a great friend.


Treats girls so nicely.

Has dated a girl that cheated on him with Tanner.

Hates Tanner.

Wants to punch Tanner.

Is a level above me in math.

Doesn't get in trouble.

Loves the Legend of Zelda.

Drives himself places and doesn't ask me for rides.

Offers me rides.

Is a sap for romance.

Dated a lot.

Doesn't sleep around.

Very emotional kind of guy.

Has a big heart.

Doesn't flirt so obviously.

Asked me out.

I said yes.

Not sure how I feel about him.

My boyfriend for three months.

I sigh and click my pen. I don't have much else to write and appreciate how the bell rings just as I finish.

I gather all my note cards and stuff my math stuff back into my backpack. Kelly walks over to me and raises an eyebrow.

"Saw you writing on people…"

"Yeah…" I narrow my eyes at here and we both smile and leave.

"So despite that you defaced innocent little children, what else were you writing so profusely?"

"Oh you know math stuff." I shrug.

"You don't write the profusely in Ms. Turner's math class." We share a look exchanging the same thought of how bad of a teacher she is.

"Fine I was making lists." I admit.

"Knew it. What're they about this time?"

"People." I say nonchalantly.

We both look at each other when we notice Tanner walking into the building and smiles as me.

"Well hello Evie."

I wrinkle my nose and just keep on walking. Tanner walks with us not even fazed by my coldness. He never was and I guess that's one of the reasons why I like being with him. He accepts me and doesn't find any of it odd. Sure people accept me-if they don't they pretend to because no one wants to be on the other end of my cold stare-but he genuinely accepts me.

Tanner bumps into my arm and before we were in such a close proximity I could smell it anyway.

"Out smoking again." I state.

"No," He denies with a smile.

"The smell of tobacco smoke just radiates off of you. Albeit cheap smokes, but still."

"I know you love the smell of American Spirits, but Marlboros are just more affordable." He shrugs.

"Whatever," I shrug.

"So how was math without me?" He grins cheekily.

"Boring-the same as it is with you."

He touches where his heart should be, "That hurt."

"It's true though."

"Yeah well math is boring with you too. You just make it bearable."

"Uh huh okay."

"It's true."

"Alright," I roll my eyes and notice Julian from our math class, "Hi Julian!"

"Hi," He raises a meek hand and gives me a closed lip smile, but looks amused.

I swear this kid thinks Tanner and I are fucking, but we really aren't.

"Hi Julian!" Tanner shouts slightly mocking me, but also putting the attention on him.

"Hey," He chuckles and waves. Julian stops at his locker and Tanner and I just leave. Somewhere in this Kelly left us. Why to leave me with him Kelly…

"So," Tanner takes me hand and I don't even flinch or move, "Your dress looks pretty."

I look down and remember that I am in fact wearing a dress. Its form fitting and the smallest size they carry. The top is black while bottom half is horizontally white striped. I have patented black plumps to match and a black cardigan. I forgot that I was dressed up for Marketing.


"You're so skinny though." He pinches my side causing me to flinch.

I swat his arm away, "Okay."

"I'm serious you are though Evie."




"Stop sounding so disbelieving then." He grumbles.

I glare at him and we head down the empty hallway in silence. I had AP Physics which was in the very isolated hallway. Tanner had AP Spanish, but he didn't care if he was late. I notice how he's wearing a red polo and it looks nice on him. Everything looks nice on him. Things also look nice off of him too.

"I can be as believing or disbelieving as I want to be."

Tanner takes me hand again and intertwines our fingers. The other hand is running though my hair. I frown at how I know we'll probably end up fighting and not at how intimate this is.

"Why must you question and oppose everything I say?"

"Why can't I?"

"Like that!"

I roll my eyes, "Whatever."

"And I know you're going to oppose and question this…but Evie…"

I turn my head to the sound of footsteps. Tanner still has his eyes on me. My heart pounds when I realize that Kennedy is walking towards us. Because he's in my physics class…I forgot and I guess Tanner did too.

"What're you doing Collis?"

With a cocky grin Tanner replies, "Speaking to your girlfriend."

I sigh detangle myself from Tanner and walk into the classroom ignoring the two. Surprisingly Kennedy enters right after me and I feel proud that he didn't fight Tanner on this.

The bell rings shortly after and I take out a bare notecard.

Finish my observational drawing.

Tell Kelly that she shouldn't have left me alone with Tanner.

Ignore Tanner.

Remember to wait for Chris so we can go to Panera after school.

Break up with Kennedy.

By the time I had settled down with my French Onion soup Chris was still shaking his head.

"I can't believe you broke up with Kennedy because of Tanner."

"Not because of Tanner." I correct.

"Sure seems like it." He gives me a look.

"It's not."

He snorts, "Because it's not like Tanner James isn't so into you."

"Tanner James Collis just want to be in me. He's not into me."

Chris chokes on his chips and swallows half of water bottle.

"Okay true, but it doesn't mean that he so isn't willing to change his ways for you."

I roll my eyes, "I'm not the girl that guys change for."

"Then what are you oh wise one?"

"I'm the girl that guys give up on." I give him a knowing look.

"Okay that's mostly true, but it's because you're stone cold to guys who likes you Evie."

I shrug, "I know. I can't help it."

"And Tanner knows and accepts that!"

"I'm sorry I thought you thought that Tanner was an asshole? Since when were you President of the I Love Tanner committee?"

"I still think he's an asshole."

"And asshole you want me to date?"

Chris sucks in some air through his teeth, "Honestly he's a sketchy terrible guy…and I loved you with Kennedy despite that it went sour as of late, but around you Tanner doesn't seem as awful."

"Well I'm never going to date him."

How considerate he was.

How he wasn't possessive and let me do my own thing when I needed to.

How he just hated Tanner despite anything to do with me.

How he would bring me soup when I was sick.

How he really did like me.

How honest his feelings were.

How I never questioned his intentions towards me.

I finish adding on to my list of things I liked about dating Kennedy and look up as a shadow looms over me.

"Can I help you?" I sass.

"Well," Tanner sits down in the stool next to me, "Mr. Hayne sent me over. He was us to review the research plans the freshmen submitted."

I wrinkle my note and close my binder, "If we must."

I always liked being a TA. I never did anything but occasionally grade papers or make posters, and of course I had to deal with Tanner whose Mr. Hayne's TA while I'm Mrs. Hayne's. Mr and Mrs. Hayne are in their late twenties, the former teaches chem while the latter teacher bio. In freshman year biology was my favorite and in sophomore year I just loved chemistry. Physics…not so much, but it's not that bad. I had Mr. Hayne for chem and he just adored me, so it causes me to question why he sends Tanner over to work with me when he knows I don't like him.

"Look at how ridiculous this one is," Tanner laughs showing me the paper that says 'The Effects of Ink on Teeth'.

I lightly smile and shake my head.

Tanner takes my much smaller hand in his. I notice how he's got something scribbled on his hand that I didn't write. I'm the only person who writes on his hands so I'm naturally curious. I let go and flip his hands over.

Her five freckles under her right eye and the two under her left.

Her eyelashes.

Her lips.

Her peachy lips that always look a bit swollen.

Her messy sexy bed hair.

Her body.

Her long black hair.

Her bright green eyes.

Her honesty.

Her bitchiness.

Her smell.

Her ability to make me day and send tingles down my whole body.

I look up at Tanner and he's already watching me. I notice how the list on his right hand is titled 'What I love about Evie'. It looks like his neat lefty hand writing and it's all scrunched up to fit in his large hand.

I frown and Tanner kisses the side of my head.

I don't flinch or push him away but I keep on frowning.

"I love you Evie." He intimately whispers into my ear. It should make me feel uncomfortable. I should be fleeing right on the spot, but only after I gave Tanner James Collis a good kick in the pants.

I let his hand go and return to grading the papers. I don't say anything.

Tanner returns to his and doesn't press the matter.

In math the next day I had written a list on Tanner's clean right hand.

Reasons Why I Can't Date Tanner Collis

He'll break my nonexistent heart.

After I had woken up from my math time nap the bell rung and Tanner was waiting for me. Together we walk out of math since Kelly already ditched me. We trade mean spirited banter as we always do and I notice how Tanner had written something on my arm while I was sleeping.

Evie Hendrickson already has and has broken my nonexistent heart. But I promise I'll always love her…and I know she'll fight me on it.

Tanner slips his hand into mine and I don't flinch or push him away.

We just walk together like it's the most natural thing in the world.

Things I noticed

He doesn't promise to not break my heart, but he promises he'll still love me.

He doesn't fight me and if he does he'll admit I'm right anyway.

I love Tanner Collis too.

A/n: Oneshot that I wrote out of procrastination and things in my life. And I mean reviews would be nice but you know…XXX