A/N: I changed the story title to 'Smile For Me'! The cover for this story was also drawn by my friend, Leann. It didn't turn out exactly as I hoped, she looks a little scary. It's still well drawn. :) However, in reality, or in the is story, she is expressionless. I have made a few new changes, if you have already read it, please read it once again. It's been awhile since I've updated or touched this story. It may be nice to refresh your memory as well. Thank you.
Oyasumi: Goodnight (in Japanese.)
Is it not funny? I think it is. To know you're alone even though you're surrounded with nothing but people. So many empty hearts and false, forced smiles. It sickens me. If it's not a pure smile please, don't bother smiling. No one asked you to. Faking a smile and acting like a happy-go-lucky person is no different from lying.
"Karine! Come here, make some new friends!"
Perfect. My father is coming. His black hair is combed neatly to the right side of his thin face. His golden eyes stand out due to his pale skin. He spoke with a large smile and such joyous gestures as he walked towards me. Then casually leaned in to my left and whispered directly to my ear with a voice that seemed to be as cold as the winter snow, falling brutally in the north, "Today is the day your existence shall be made known. You will sing a song so magnificently; they will have no choice but to sign you. If you fail me once more, prepare to be disowned."
He smiled once again and walked in the direction of four elderly men, probably around their sixties? They're all dressed in sophisticated brand named suits. One man is fashioning a peach colored Gucci suit with a white Louis Vuitton tie. Which in my opinion, is a terrible combination.
Despite their taste in clothes, I'm sure they're important people. My father avoids associating with useless people.
The thought of being disowned by this man, I unwillingly call father, didn't frighten me. The thought of being disowned again did. I've been abandoned by my father once before. Then soon after, he discovered about my many 'money making talents'. He's the type to do whatever he can in order to gain money. Even if it cost his life, never mind mine. So, for his personal use, he took me back once more.
I can sing. I have the ability to sing any note. High or low, I can hit the note without flaw. I'm a prodigy as you can say. After all, my mother was a singer. Don't misunderstand. I don't think highly of myself, I just know what I'm capable of.
I can draw. I can recreate whatever I am instructed to. Show me a picture for as little as three seconds, take it away. I'll draw it perfectly without fail. My 'father' forced me to draw and paint multiple pictures and scenes of nature.
He use to beat me until I had blood drip upon my wooden ivory floor.
However, it was never as painful as being left behind in such a cruel and worthless world. No one wants to be alone. Yet, some people can do nothing but bare it. Some people like me.
My mother once lived with me. That was a very long time ago. She left me in the care of this man, while she ran off with another.
Not too long ago did my father marry a woman with a much higher class than my mother. I can assure you he loves her not. For he had already stated with a voice so harsh; he only married her for her money and to gain a higher status.
My father is a lowly cowered yet, he acts as if he were to soon be crowned king. Such a pitiful soul he has, does he not?
"I'd like to thank everyone for taking time to attend and celebrate my eldest son's birth. I apologize for the delay of music. The musicians may arrive in twenty minutes. In the mean time, will anyone care to come up and sing?" The president of the A&K music company, Akimoto Akita, asked in a happy tone.
Silence. There aren't any volunteers. I refuse to be one. I must be whole heartily requested. Otherwise, my value will lower.
He brushes away his soft green hair revealing his hazel brown eyes, "Very well then. I believe we have a new arising singer in this very room."
He scans the room with his narrow eyes and stops at the sight of me. "Karine-san, I have heard much about you. Why don't you come up and sing a song for us?"
Suddenly, the guests and servers turned to face the person whom the president spoke of. Murmers and whispers begin to fill the banquet hall rapidly.
It's irritating me. This man's request is forced, like his pathetic smile. I have the urge to slap his face, "Sorry, but I'm afraid I have failed to prepare a song for tonight. I'll have to politely decline."
That should do it. Although I do have a song prepared, I refuse to perform for someone with a half-hearted request.
"Kyaaa~! It's him! The son of the world wide music company" A group of girls at one table shrieked. They all seem around my age. Sixteen I suppose. "Kyaaa~! Zahyn-sama!" Why were they all fusing? Have they no poise even though they have been brought up in such wealthy families? Surely, they have an educator.
Suddenly, a tall and fair boy with silver white hair and dark scarlet eyes stepped upon the stage. This must be the 'Zahyn-sama' those girls were screaming about. He seems to be a year or two older than I. I can somewhat see why those girls were acting like children. He seems somewhat eye catching. Somewhat.
He grabbed the microphone. Will he sing? No, he smiles and says with a voice so ever kind, "Please, Karine-san? Won't you at least sing one song?" This young man… Why? Why out of the six hundred guests here, he is the only one with a pure and beautiful smile?
I hesitate, then bring myself to respond, "Very well, you may choose the song."
He smiled again, "Thank you. Alright then, how about one of my favorite songs. I'm sorry, goodbye."
I tried not to smirk, "I know this song well." I calmly walk up the stage revealing myself under a blanket of colorful lights. This 'Zahyn-sama' handed me the microphone gently and walked off the stage.
I allowed the music to fill the room. Then suddenly my part to sing arrived.
"I just want to know if you would be okay if I left. My heart is gone and my spirit is broken. What can I do? I don't want to leave you. I don't want to leave you, but I want to be free. I'll come back again. I promise. I'll save you. You're mine. Will you always be? I'm so sorry. I cannot stay or this heart will soon fray. Will you wait for me?" My heart seems to always become heavy when I sing this song. I sing the rest of the song with a soft yet, strong voice.
My mother use to sing this song to me. She left ten years ago. She's not coming back. That is a fact made known to my father as well as I.
As I finish the last line my eyes unwillingly water. Thankfully, I'm quite far from the audience. They're all sitting at their assigned tables.
I finished the song. It's silent now. Was my singing that bad? I didn't practice so it's not my fault right? I shouldn't have sung after all. I should have not dared to accept 'Zahyn-sama's' request only because his smile was the most pure and beautiful out of this crowd of the wealthy.
Then surprisingly, the crowd cheered and applauded in unison at my performance. I didn't even rehearse. Father has always stated, 'Only the one that works the hardest shall succeed. The one who does nothing but sit shall wither away in failure.' So, why?
The man, who had first requested me to sing, approached the stage with a face filled with awe. I handed him the microphone. He stared at me for a short while then finally managed to utter the words, "Thank you Karine-san for that wonderful and inspiring performance." Was he not just earlier forcing a smile? Why is he now truly, smiling? I didn't prepare to sing. Why is everyone so… Happy?
I try my best to smile. I smile a small, faint smile, bow only slightly and walk off the stage as graceful and poised as possible. Image and personality is important for a singer.
As I walk towards my assigned table, I noticed my father with a disgusted face. A face of anger and… Sadness? Maybe I'm wrong. Though I'm almost never wrong when reading someone's expression.
It's dead silent. Tension and anger creates an uncomfortable atmosphere as I sit in the limousine next to my step mother on our way home. Her long blonde hair, curled and pinned elegantly in a bun. Her navy blue cocktail dress looks lovely with her slightly tanned skin and deep emerald eyes.
When we alas arrive at our large mansion, a chauffeur stretched his arm to open the door. However, my father managed to push it first, with such force too, and walked into the house quickly, silently. My step mother followed behind him with a freighted and worried face. I apologize to the chauffeur for my father's rudeness and headed straight to my room.
I push my dark mahogany door and enter my room. Why was he angry? I thought to myself. I sang a song like he wanted me to. It may not have been a song of his choice but I still sang a song. The president of the producing company even praised me. What did I do wrong this time? Was it because I hadn't agreed to song at first?
I walk up towards my large, gold framed mirror. I stare at my reflection for a short while. Soon, my eyes burn and tears overflow. I cry, in pain and pity. Just like a weakling. Why must I be so weak?
I just want to be accepted by my father. I never seem to impress him or live up to his expectations.
I… Hate myself. If it weren't for my drawing and singing abilities, he would have never taken me back. Why, why did he keep me? Screams of frustration take over my mind as I change into my night gown and lie on my bed.
Soon, the world is forgotten and my pain and sadness is vanished. At least, until I wake. After I regain consciousness in the morning, I go back to the world I was never welcomed in. Oyasumi.