SISTER DOUGHNUT BUYS A PONY
At present, Sis was the last person you would want to tick off. Visible steam blew out of her ears, threatening to whiplash anyone who dared to stand close. And her eyes. Her beady little eyes put all others to shame.
So upon arrival home, when she was expecting bombardment of stupid questions from her brother and Rev, she was oddly relieved to see FD deep in civil conversation with a girl.
"Brother, of all the lazy, uncanny things you do with your life, why are you acting like a normal being for once in your life now of all times?"
FD was confused by the question, cautiously bringing a tortilla chip to his mouth and biting it slowly. More proof that something was terribly wrong. At snail's pace, he chewed, aware of SIs' hard glare, but trying to avoid answering for as long as he possible could. Finally, he gave in, "Similie Steph here has a problem."
"My name is Similie Stacey. My mother is Symphonic Steph."
FD blinked his eyes in surprise, "Symphonic Steph has a daughter? Shouldn't you have told me this in the first place?"
"She will have a daughter. In about two and a half years. Me."
The wombat pair exchanged a look before shaking their heads to dispel the statement, "Please tell me we're not in a bad rehash of Dragon Ball Z...or Back to the Future."
The girl sighed sadly, continuing her odd story, "My mother is planning to help DD take over the universe."
The siblings gasped in shock, "Never say that name here! It's dangerous!"
The tree began to shake violently, "Yes, yes! Don't say it!" After a few seconds, it came to a gentle halt.
"Anyway...he stole something of yours," Stacey pulled out a color-changing bagel, "Do you remember the first incident?"
"Yes," FD sneered, "That little rat cheated his way through the entire time...I'll never forgive him."
"Ever since that day, he became our enemy," Sis explained calmly, "And that's what led up to the second incident."
Stacey nodded in complete understanding, "There's one thing you wouldn't recall...your powers."
Once again, they shook their heads in disagreement, "What are you talking about?" Sis asked in confusion, "We're flying, talking wombats who snark and ruin the plans of power hungry mice."
"That's true, but D- he stole your time traveling powers and sealed them inside this bagel. Well, not this one specifically...it's hard to explain. After that, he made you forget you ever had them."
At that precise moment, Rev floated in, yawning carelessly as he noted the guest in his living room, "What did I miss?"
DD was not satisfied by the progress of his new sky lair, "I told them: a cheese room is impractical, even for a mouse!" He gritted his teeth and marched into his meeting room. All of his trusted officials were seated silently, dying to hear his presentation. Triumphantly, he smirked. Yes. They've all been waiting for this. For me. I must be something else, huh?
He cleared his throat before the room, "Good afternoon one and all. Rest assured that I don't have to introduce myself, now do I?" They laughed hard at the rhetorical question, "Good, good. Then let's get down to business," He pulled a pocket sized laser pointer to a descending white screen, "Maurice, start the show. And I thought I told you to change your name to something more befitting of my empire!"
A video began to roll on the screen, rolling down from 5 to 2. An odd looking gopher popped up on the screen and spoke, "Howdy y'all! I'm Petey Twofeet, your average gopher living in the future empire of King DD! I'm here today to broadcast the way to achieve this goal!
"For starters, you are all gonna need to need to get your hands on the first Tinkerbellina Poppa Rose doll. You all know how much DD loves his dolls! Then, you must storm out the Fairy Queen's palace and steal the time travelling bagel. It should be a cakewalk from there!"
The video ended, and there were small bouts of applause.
"Very good, very good," The mouse chuckled darkly until his laughter became contagious. He was immediately silenced by the presence of a concealed young woman. He huffed, "You're late...Steph."
She grinned wildly, "I was taking care of a little business. I sent the dragon to the Lemonade Witch."
He scoffed, "I told you already. No spell can counteract the Juice Box girl's wish."
"No spell," she responded cooly, "But the witch's specialty is potions."
He returned the mischievous grin, "I really like the way you think, Steph."
The long, overbearing wait period proved to be too much for Orange Dragon, who was restraining from dying of boredom, "What is that woman doing?"
Tangerina calmly sipped her cherry soda, ignoring the enraged beast's ramblings. What he was unaware of, was that the Lemonade Witch was carefully crafting the perfect concoction, and this took hours of precision and accuracy for the best results.
Of course, Orange Dragon could have cared less about that crap.
"I want it now!" he whined like a bratty five year old.
And Tangerina, playing the role of the exhausted mother, said, "Just shut up and wait for your damn potion!"
The three wombats sat in their uncomfortable living room, allowing the words of Similie Stacey to sink in.
"So basically, your mother is Symphonic Steph, she plans to help him take over the world, originally uses a potion to turn the Jones girl back into a juice box, but because of precautions, will get Orange Dragon to hire the Lemonade Witch out for the potion instead, and you and this Monic Mikey guy need to find a pretty pony and magical mango to prevent the transformation?"
Stacey stared at the blue wombat dumbly, "Um, yeah... pretty much."
Sis whispered to Rev, "She sounds like she's a novelist. We should buy her next book that comes out. It sounds really good."
The girl sighed, "Look, I know this sounds sketchy...but I really do need your help finding this pony. Who knows where we could find him?"
"I do. It's called the internet," Rev retorted.
"What's the internet?"
The wombat trio looked at her in shock, "You're twenty years from the future, and never heard of the internet?"
"My mom didn't want a lot of people knowing I existed. She said that if I used a computer, I would expose my existence to all through 'social media websites' or something ridiculous like that. She also said we were too cool for it."
Sis sighed, "Okay, just leave it to me. FD, go into the kitchen and make us some sandwiches."
A large flatscreen monitor swung down in front of a bunch of odd, electrical keyboards and machines. Sis leaped into a green office chair that spun itself perfectly to the main station, and pulled the Google search engine.
"Why don't you just use Yahoo?" Rev grumbled.
"Google has everything! Haven't you learned anything from anime?"
"That was an abridged series."
"Oh yeah, I remember now," Whatever else he was saying, she completely and blatantly ignored, typing the term "Magical Pony" and getting a variety of results, including but not limited to My Little Pony, haters of My Little Pony, My Little Pony fanfiction, and pony shaped coconuts. At the bottom of the third page, she encountered an odd ad listing "Pretty Pony: a magical pony that we just randomly found somewhere. I think it was the forest. Or maybe the desert. Whatever."
"That's him!" Stacey cried, still in awe of the screen, "Can you buy him?"
"I'm not sure," Sis grumbled, "I wasn't aware that animals could be sold online."
"Could they sell him in plush form?"
"Yes, though I don't see why that matters."
Stacey narrowed her eyes, "He can switch from his real form into a stuffed animal if he doesn't like the people he's near. It looks like he's a plushie right now," she studied the projected image intently, while Sis scrolled and hit the Buy Now button.
"Only five acorns? That's a bargain!"
"That's because they're unaware of his value!" Stacey huffed, "They have no clue that he is going to save the world from D-him."
The purchase was made, and the only thing left to do was wait for the enchanted package to arrive...
References made from Father Doughnut's Long Day
"This. Is. SPARTA!" - The internet meme taken from the film 300.
A/N: This chapter was based off the fact that Father Doughnut had an entire chapter dedicated to himself, so I figured I would do one for all of the Doughnuts. But the next chapter from what I recall doesn't really focus on Rev at all...
I wonder if anyone will guess what abridged series the Doughnuts made reference to...
Next time: Monic Mikey Finds A Mango!
"ZOMGELZ! THE WORLD IS ENDING! THE WORLD IS ENDING!"
"No, it's not. That's my watch."
"ZOMGELZ! HIS WATCH IS ENDING! HIS WATCH IS ENDING!"