For starters, my name is Caterina Nicole Vazquez, but people just call me Cat. No this isn't some dumb story where I just sit here and talk about a bully picking on me, or boy troubles because to tell you the truth, my life is way worse than that shit. My dad has been married 56 times and is engaged to a woman named Li Chang. Believe it or not, that girl is not Asian. I don't know where she's from but when I IMed my dad, he said that she isn't Asian, so I'm taking his word for it. My mother is a stripper at a club called Men's Rough House. Of course I don't approve of this, I mean, that is the worst job she could ever raise me with. No wonder I'm such a slut. Ok maybe not a total slut, but I do attract every guy's attention in a ten mile radius and I have done some pretty bad stuff. Continuing from earlier, I left my mom and moved into an amazing apartment with my friends Aria, Noel, Koby, Tris, Lili, and Kyle lives across the hall from us. He visits occasionally.

We all moved out when we were Freshmen, and don't ask me how we lived through it. My father and the others parents donate money towards us and we still manage to go to clubs and drink even though we're only Sophomores. Yeah, I know. We're crazy asses. I manage to get in trouble at school almost everyday, but with my amazing acting skills and the pervert principal, I just where low-cut shirts and tell him my grandmother died. That always gets him and he let's me out of detention. On occasion, it's usually me or Noel that get in the most trouble. Tris does too, but her reasons are mostly for being Tris. Mine are for back talking and Noel... I'm not too sure about him. Thing is…in our house…I've slept with every guy, Aria's slept with every guy, and Noel's slept with every girl. Only in our house though! We aren't that bad of people.

The first time I had sex was when I was a 7th grader and that was with Noel, my ex-boyfriend. Koby is my current boyfriend and I don't plan on ending it, even though rumor has it that Noel is still madly in love with me. Lili tried telling me that Aria is still in love with Koby (her ex-boyfriend) but I'm not sure I quite believe that. Aria told me she doesn't like anyone and I would be a little pissed if she did have feelings for my boyfriend.

Koby and Noel are brothers. Their step-brother is Kyle and that is all because Kyle's mom married Koby and Noel's father. Koby and Noel are twins, but they have their differences thank God. Koby isn't a man whore like Noel. Nothings wrong with tha- ok yeah; there is. Nobody really ever likes Noel's girlfriends. He chooses the wrong ones. Aria and Tris were fine, but then his other choices became enemies with me. It was like they wanted to kill me or something. Then again, they were on my target list as well, until he dumped them. I am dating Koby, but I still have some feelings for Noel. I have slept with the guy 487.5 times and I'm not sure about Koby. I haven't calculated that. Yeah, I know you're probably thinking well why have you calculated yours and Noel's? Well, actually, it came up one night so I had no choice but to answer with my total.

The deal with Kyle is…some people think he is gay. I don't and I know Tris knows he's not. They fooled around a bit one time and so that's how she knows. I just don't think he is. The reason people only think he's gay is because when we were in kindergarten, I had this fuzzy white, teddy bear hat. It was Kyle's birthday and I was invited for his party. My mother -being the mother she is- didn't get him a present so unless I thought of something soon, I would be screwed. I rummaged through my room for so long until I found the hat and put it in a bag with paper stuffing and my card. When I arrived and Kyle opened his gift, he put it on his head immediately and has worn it ever since. He does wash it though! Kyle makes sure that it isn't on a school day when he washes it so he can wear it at school. It compliments him. Plus, I would think he is a new kid if he wasn't wearing it.

So, I've told you about my life, but I haven't told you about my housemates too much. I am going to dedicate one paragraph each for each one of them. Kyle already kind of got his, but…oh alright! I will make a paragraph about Kyle too.

Tris is my friend. I used to hate her guts, but she changed (somewhat). Tris is still a little slut and she sleeps with Noel whenever they get together, but there isn't anything mistaken about that. That's the girl's lifestyle and I cannot judge considering my own conditions. Tris sleeps in the bed with Aria. She is in a current relationship with Michael who is Aria's older brother. There isn't much of an age difference because Michael is a Senior so she's good. Tris is mostly known for her outfits and seductive attitude. Adding to that, she's a slut/whore. She's more slutty than whorey, but I still love the girl no matter what she does with her…we'll drop it there.

Noel. Yes I have mentioned Noel a couple times, but he needs more. Noel is always with a girl. Whether that's in a relationship or just fuck buddies. That's what separates him from Koby. Koby isn't exactly outgoing like Noel, and Noel is just Noel. Nothing more than that. It's something about him that makes girls fall for him. I did. And I slept with him many many times…like that time in Paris…Oh right, sorry. So, that's basically Noel for you. Now onto Lillian!

Lili is Tris' sister. Lili looks nothing like Tris other than the eye color. Tris has a darkish brown hair and Lili is a ginger. While Tris is the slut, Lili is the sweet girl that can snap at you when she wants. Although Lili is a sweetheart, she made the mistake of sleeping with Noel. I forgave her, but she was shunned. You should never sleep with Noel unless you are committed to him. Well not exactly committed, but in a relationship. Lili is one of my best friends so I had to shun her for a day or two.

Koby. Koby, Koby, Koby. Gotta love that kid. Koby is with me and will be for a long time. He is very forgiving and hilarious when he's himself. Koby has been with a lot of girls, believe me or not, but he has. Not Noel's type of girl, but with kinds like Lili. You never want to get Koby so drunk that he has a hangover in the morning. He thinks you're yelling when you are talking so you have to whisper, but he snaps out of it sooner or later. Sadly, it's usually later.

Aria has been my friend for awhile. We share a pair of jeans. They aren't literally the same pair, but they are the same exact design just like copies of the same thing. We both have our own pair. Aria used to be with Koby when I was with Noel. We all broke up around the same time and then Aria was with Noel. They were perfect until they weren't. It didn't work after that. Aria's grown a little distant, but I wouldn't be surprised if she went back with Phillip.

Michael isn't really that big in our lives except Tris'. He is Aria's brother, but he only visits sometimes. He was in this one phase where he wanted to be on Broadway. Strange, I know, but he came back to normal. I always call Michael, Michelangelo. He doesn't care because I'm Cat.

Lastly, I finish with Kyle. I already told you about him and Kyle just cracks us all up. He is a really funny guy and is in a current relationship with some British girl we all hate. No offense to Nathalia, but I hate her little blond hair. I wish Kyle was interested in better people, but considering people think he's gay, he has to get the easy ones. Sorry Kyle!

It's been a long time writing this and you had to read it, but I'm not done. I have to tell you all my stories. No not in this specific chapter, but I do have to tell you all of our little secrets and anything else that goes on in our lives. So, don't leave forever. You will want to stay for the rest later. ;)