Why do I love you so much? It hurts me to even think about it.
Remember the time when you said you loved me and I said I loved you?
I wish those times could come back again.
But they won't, will they?
I still remember when we agreed to not take it any step further.
We agreed to be not more than just close friends.
That agreement, oh, how I detest it. I wish I never made it.
But you keep sticking to it.
Do you not love me anymore?
I sound so hard up for you.
But then, why do all the little feelings you have for me keep slipping through those carefully disguised words you choose to mask them under?
Why do you keep affecting me like this?
Why do we even talk about cuddling together or even sleeping together, innocently?
Are we really just friends?
Have the feelings on your side dissipated?
You really don't know, do you.
How I cry myself to sleep every night thinking about you.
Thinking about you and some other girl.
No, you don't have a girl yet, but when you do, I'll be the most jealous creature alive.
That is when I'll slap myself and tell myself to behave and play the part of the best friend.
The friend who will always be by your side, no matter who you are with and get her heart broken each second more.
I try to be flirty, but you just laugh it off.
But when you try to be flirty, do I do that? No.
Right now, I'm so pissed at you.
I don't know how you can make me feel so many emotions that range from the opposite poles.
I send you a message, you miss it.
Fine, I think to myself, I'll just go to bed.
But then you reply and how it makes my heart clench because I just can't stay mad at you.
I'll be fine tomorrow, I know.
But I just want to make you go through a bit of hell, if you know what I mean.
You define it as a day for two lovers who give their love to each other and remember their love for one another.
But hey, Valentine's, to me, is about spreading my love to the people I cherish.
And one of them happens to be you.
You lucky bastard.
Having held my affections for so many years.
Yeah, I've had a few crushes now and then but I've gotten over them all.
But you know who I'm so deeply and madly in love with?