Well, don't ask me why, but FictionPress is only giving me a little tiny two line window to work with (talk about annoying), so I apologize for any upload issues. Anyway, don't know why, but this idea refused to leave me for FIVE years. I finally gave in and penned it, it's dark, sad and tragic, but apparently that's what I wanted to write. Hopefully now, I can move past this piece and onto other ideas I have, but I just couldn't write as this kept coming to the forefront every time I picked up a pen. Enjoy

I refused to cry, refused to sob or be so overcome with tears that I couldn't speak, but walking down the empty alleyway, I couldn't stop a few tears from running down my cheeks.

I don't know how it happened, it was so slow, and yet so fast, that I didn't notice the signs until it was too late. Maybe I didn't want to see the signs either, but I didn't expect it to happen… Six years, six fucking years is what we had—fourteen years all together if I count from when we were just friends and not lovers. We were inseparable for fourteen years, no one could break us apart regardless of how one may try, we were always there for each other and so it was just so natural that once we understood what attraction was, that we came to realize our attraction to each other. So how was it that she could just waltz in and change everything in just five months?

He said he hated her at first, that she annoyed him, but because he was Class President, it was his duty to help the new kid fit in. I understood, it was the duties of each Class President, but what I didn't understand was three weeks later, still showing her to her classes, talking to her teachers and getting her involved in after school activities. But then it was that she needed tutoring help and because he shared most of her classes, it made sense that he tutored her.

"Don't worry babe, you're the one who holds my heart." He said, smiling down at me. "She just needs some help in her classes."

"And why can't someone else help her?" I almost growled. "She's taking up all of your time and I don't get to see you as often anymore. There are other tutors and I'm sure she has enough friends now that you don't need to walk her to her classes." Behind us, I saw HER appear in the hall, her green eyes scanning the crowd until they landed on us—no, not us, but him. Those eyes lit up as soon as she spotted him and she immediately started our way. I looked up at him sullenly, "She likes you."

He snorted, "Well, I don't like her, but I love you." He whispered, his dark blue eyes captivating my gaze and he gave me a soft smile. He tilted my head up softly and began to lean down to kiss me.

"Hi Jesse!"

He broke away to address Ma—

"Don't make a move." A guttural voice said as something hard was pressed into my back.

I gasped, but remained still, a sad smile coming to my lips. "Can I help you?" I asked, staring straight ahead and assessing my position. This was a cross alley, there were no doors or windows nor was there anyone around at 2am in the morning. Scattered pieces of trash and a lone dumpster met my gaze, not a person in sight. The only time anyone came down this alley was on Tuesdays for trash day and it was Thursday, no one would be here to help me.

"Just give me your money and you won't get hurt, girlie." The man said, pressing the object harder into my back.

Quickly turning around, I pressed my back up against the brick wall and assessed my attacker. He was large, probably well over six feet, but his frame wasn't bulky. The dirty tee showed he had defined muscles and the baggy pants gave the impression that he carried more than a gun on a normal basis. Lifting my gaze up, my eyes stopped briefly on the track marks on his arms before taking in the black gun pointed my way. His hands were slightly shaking as he leveled the gun at me, he obviously hadn't gotten a fix recently and was probably desperate enough to kill me to get it. There was a tattoo on his neck and his hair fell in greasy strands around his face, I couldn't tell if it was black normally or only because of its unwashed state. Finally raising my gaze, I stared into his bloodshot eyes. Brown, dark brown, the color of mud stared back at me.

Tilting my head to the side, I smiled and murmured, "I have a different idea."

"Jesse, come on, it's been weeks since we went out on a proper date." I whined into the phone. I had already finished my homework and was now lounging on my bed as I talked to him.

He chuckled, "I know, love, I know and I promise to make it up to you, just not this week."

"Why not?"

"It's already jam packed, babe." He sighed, "I've got baseball tryouts Monday and Tuesday, then Wednesday is the monthly Class Cabinet Meeting, Thursday Mom and Dad want to take me out to celebrate my report card and Friday I have tutoring."

"With Marie?" I almost spat.

I could almost hear him rub his temples through the phone, "Yes, with Marie."

"How is it that she gets to see more of my boyfriend than I do?"

"Baby, she transferred from a public school to a private school, so she's behind. She really does need the help and you know I'm one of the best tutors around. I taught you Physics, didn't I?"

"Your ego astounds me." I said flatly, but a small smile played on my lips.

He laughed, a deep rumbling laugh. "Well, what did you expect to happen when I began dating the most beautiful girl in the world?"

I blushed at the compliment. "Jesse!"

"I'm just stating facts."

"Well, in that case, you know that class we're taking on Human Sexuality?" I asked, my voice dropping an octave.


"I think I need some one-on-one tutoring."

I heard him choke on his drink before I heard his mother asking him if he was okay. "You… you minx!"

Laughter filled the air.

"I don't think you understand, girlie, either hand over the money or I will shoot you." He said, waving the gun around.

I smiled at him, "Oh, I understand perfectly, I just want to strike a deal with you."

"I ain't looking for sex," He grinned, his gaze turning lewd as he scanned my body, "but if you're offering…"

Glaring, I hugged my arms to my body. "I'm not."

Rage contorted his face at being turned down so bluntly. "Then hand over the fucking money!" He shouted, shoving the gun in my face.

"Look, all I have is a bank card," I said, digging into my pocket and pulling out the yellow plastic card, "but I will give you the PIN if you do one thing for me."

His eyes narrowed as he thought it over, absentmindedly scratching at his arm where the track marks were. "What do you want me to do?"

"Kill me."

"Hi Marie, what a pleasant surprise." I said sarcastically as the young woman sat herself down across from Jesse, who elbowed me and shot me a disapproving look.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but…" Marie stuttered, wringing her hands nervously.

"Don't mind her, she got a C on her History test and isn't in the greatest mood." He said, smiling at the nervous blonde.

"Well, maybe if someone would help me study instead of others—"

Elbowing me again, he interrupted me and said, "What did you need Marie?"

"W-well, I wanted to thank you for all your help and my mother w-wanted me to invite you to a family dinner tomorrow in thanks."

"Sorry, but he's already got plans." I said immediately. Tomorrow was First Saturday and we always held a movie marathon of all the movies that came out last month that we want to see.

"Well" Jesse started awkwardly," I'm sure I can make it though, if it's a dinner."

What. The. Hell. Shock spread across my face as I watched him accept her offer, "What?"

"Really?" Marie asked, her face lighting up. "Oh, my mother will be so excited! It will be at seven at Paridisio's."

"Excuse me, but Jesse, we already have plans for tomorrow." I stressed, glaring at him.

He smiled endearingly down at me, "We have plans for tomorrow morning and afternoon, but don't you think I can skip out on dinner just this once? I mean, for the past ten years, we have been doing this without fail, don't I get a single pass?"

Hurt welled up in me and I quickly shoved my chair away from the table. "You know what, why don't we just cancel the whole day since you obviously have better things to do."

"Ames, it's not like that!" Jesse called as I stomped away, but I couldn't help but notice how he didn't come after me.

Neither did he show up for First Saturday.

"You want me to kill you?" My killer asked in shock, "Are you fucking insane?"

I chuckled, "Maybe…will you do it if I say yes?"

"I don't fucking believe this."

"Do we have a deal?" I asked, sticking my hand out to shake on it.

He peered down at my pristine nails and glanced at his own grubby, dirt encrusted hand. He scratched at his arm again as he contemplated our deal. "On one condition." He said, eyes narrowing. "You go get the money first and come back here, I ain't stupid enough to go to an ATM, they've got cameras. If you're serious, then you'll come back with the money, if you're not…" He shrugged, "Well, if I see you again, I will kill you for fuckin' with me."

"I'll be back in 10 minutes." I said, heading for the other end of the alley. I knew there was an ATM nearby, I had come down here on more than one occasion with Jesse whenever I wanted something that wasn't dripping in money.

"You never came." I said bluntly on Monday. He hadn't called me all weekend, nor did he come by the house.

"Babe," He sighed, drawing me into a hug, "I wasn't sure you wanted to talk to me. I know how you are once you make up your mind, stubborn as a rock. I figured it'd be best just to let you cool down and talk to you on Monday."

"Ever since she showed up, I don't see you as much."

"Now, that's not fair. We see each other every day and Marie takes up the least of my time. You know I have baseball and Class President duties that keep me away from you, but it's not like I like it any more than you do."

I looked up at him, reaching up to brush a strand of dark brown hair from his eyes, "Then why did you want to take our day away from us? It's the one thing I look forward to every month without fail and I thought you did too."

His eyes softened as guilt seeped into them, "Oh Ames, I'm sorry. I love our First Saturdays, I didn't know it would upset you so much to skip out on dinner."

"It wasn't really that, but just the fact that you chose Marie over me." I finally admitted, breathing in his scent, "I know you are busy, and with more than her, but we haven't had a chance to really be with each other and I had really been looking forward to it. You could've told your little shadow that you could do dinner that night or Sunday or whatever would be fine, but not on our Saturday."

"She isn't 'my little shadow', Ames. She's actually pretty cool and I think you'd guys could be friends if you tried to like her."

I pushed off his chest and looked up at him. "What happened to hating her?"

"Y-you hate me?" A voice squeaked from behind me.

His eyes focused on the petite blonde I knew was standing there. "Marie…"

Looking over my shoulder, I took in the tears trailing down her cheeks as she stared at Jesse and the devastated look on her face. "You're crying?" I asked, barely keeping the contempt out of my voice. How pathetic was this girl? She already looked like a fragile thing, small, pale and easily frightened, but I didn't think I needed to add pathetic to the list.

"Amy." Jesse reprimanded me, before focusing on Marie. "I never hated you Marie, but I just didn't like the idea of having to babysit the new girl."

"Excuse me." She whispered before ducking her head and heading down the hall, her small shoulders shaking with repressed sobs.

I heard Jesse groan and he dropped his forehead to mine. "Damn it."

"Why are you so upset over a girl crying?"

"I'm not upset," he said, "but…well, she's my Chemistry partner and she's actually pretty cool when she's not nervous as a mouse. And now she thinks I hate her, which is going to make Lab awkward as Hell."

I rolled my eyes, but shoved him towards the direction she headed. "Go ahead and fix things with her. I guess if you can be friends with her, then as a good girlfriend, I can try and be friends with her as well."

Smiling brightly, he leaned down and kissed me soundly on the lips. "I love you, you know?"

"I know, but it's still nice to hear. I love you too."

Amazing how so much can change in just five months, let alone three days. Slipping my card into the ATM, I punched in my PIN and withdrew the largest amount I could. I had turned eighteen six months ago and therefore had complete access to all my funds that had been bequeathed to me by my parents. As the money started to dispense in twenties, I thought about my parents who had died four years prior. They had loved Jesse from the first time they met him when he was four years old and had only smiled knowingly when we began dating eight years later. It had been one of the darkest days in my life when I received a call to the principal's office that day, I thought it was because of my outstanding test scores, but when I arrived, I found my counselor and two police officers waiting for me.

It was instant, I had been told. They died when the private jet they were flying hadn't landed correctly and caused the plane to flip and explode. They didn't want to show me pictures, but I demanded they let me identify—if possible—my parents because otherwise I refused to believe they were dead.

I will never be able to forget the charred, blistered skin of my father or the vibrant red of my mother's bloody face. At least they had gone together because I know neither would've been able to survive without the other for long, just as I couldn't survive without Jesse. Jesse…he was the only one who got me through that nightmare of viewings, funerals and burials, I don't know what I would've done without him. Actually, I do know, I would've fallen apart, because without him all I do is fall apart. He is the only reason I stayed sane through those months and possibly the only reason I never broke.

I laughed hollowly as I took the money from the ATM, I guess it was really only a matter of time before I broke. How ironic that the one who keeps me from breaking is the one who broke me in the end? I have no one left in my life, no grandparents, no siblings or any family. I was the single living heir to the textile kingdom my parents had left me and according to the will I had written four years ago at the persistence of the family lawyer, it will all be going to Jesse if I met an untimely death and had no heirs.

At eighteen, I certainly had no heirs to speak of, but Jesse always wanted children and he can certainly run a good business. I'm sure any children he has will have some of his business sense and so the family business will be in good hands. My parents always saw him as their son anyway and so I know they would have been happy with my choice of successor, I just don't think they would be happy as to how he is receiving the business.

Sometimes I wonder if I was the reason for my own downfall by sending him after her or if I had only sped up the inevitable, but I guess I will never know….

Things had been awkward for the last two days, ever since Jesse had gone to patch things up with Marie. I certainly was trying to be friends with the mouse, but her nervousness was downright annoying and the way she needed help with everything was bordering on the ridiculous. She couldn't even pop the tab on a can of soda and needed Jesse's help with it.

Speaking of Jesse, he had been distant since as well. I knew he was still mad at me for snapping at her yesterday, but he knew I never was one for simpering fools, which she seemed to be the epitome of. I just couldn't get why Jesse wanted to be friends with her, part of me thought maybe he was doing this for me because he knew I had no girl friends and in all honesty, my friends consisted of his guy friends—mere acquaintances for the most part.

Yet I knew something was different when they walked into the lunch room hand in hand. My eyes immediately zeroed in on their hands and I saw Jesse hastily drop hers as they approached me.

"Hey Ames, can I talk to you for a sec?" He asked, smiling at me.

"Yeah, you can." I said, anger welling in me. I made a beeline for the door and waited as Jesse followed me out into the hall. As soon as he was in front of me, I turned my rage on him. "What the hell was that? You're holding her hand? Why?"

He sighed and raked a hand through his hair, "I love you Ames, I really do, but…well…I love Marie too."

"…What?" I whispered, staring at him in shock and despair.

"I love her." He said simply, a smile gracing his lips even though his eyes were full of guilt.

"That sniveling, nervous, spineless creature in there? You love her?"

I saw a flash of anger in his eyes before he bit back his emotions. "Look, I don't know how it happened, but she's grown on me—a lot. We ended up talking for hours once I found her on Monday and the more we talked, the closer we became until…"

"Until what?"

"She kissed me." He whispered, refusing to meet my eyes, "And I kissed her back."

Betrayal stabbed straight through my heart, I couldn't breathe as I stared at this man whom I loved with my entire being who had betrayed me after telling me that he loved me.

"We both knew it was wrong and immediately separated, nothing else happened, Ames, I promise." He said, grabbing my hands, but I pulled away and he let his hands drop to his sides as his shoulders drooped. "I tried to forget about it, but…well, it brought up feelings for her that I hadn't really taken notice of."

"How can you stand here in front of me and tell me that you love me and her?" I asked, my voice trembling with sorrow and anger. "Six years, Jesse, we've been together for six years and no matter how many girls tried to take you from me, you never left me. You told me 'You're the one for me, Ames, you're the only one for me.' Was that a lie?"

"No! No, Ames, not at the time at least." He said, reaching towards me, but I jerked away from him.

"Don't touch me."

"Amy…I really do love you, more than I ever thought possible, but Marie…well, Marie needs me in a way you never have."

I scoffed, "What are you talking about, I need you Jesse, I have always needed you."

He shook his head and said quietly, "No you haven't. You're strong, you're beautiful, independent, smart and can hold you own in more ways than one. You don't need me, Ames, you never have."

"Go to Hell, you bastard." I screamed, moving forward to slap him across the face. "I gave you everything, everything, Jesse. You are the only reason that I live, don't you understand that? Without you, I don't have any reason to live!"

"That's not true Ames." He looked at me, anger burning in those blue eyes of his, "Do you seriously expect me to believe that you're suicidal? I can't believe you would try to use suicide as a way to make me stay with you."

I laughed, "You have no idea, do you Jesse? I have no one except you, no family, no friends… just you. I only have you and now you want to leave me…the one person I thought would never leave me. If it hadn't been for you, I don't think I would have survived my parents' deaths, you are the one that kept me together, Jesse."

"You would have, because you are strong, you always have been and always will be. Trying to keep me by claiming you're suicidal won't work" he said, grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me gently, "but promise me, Ames, promise me you will never take your own life. You have to promise me."

"I promised." I said, flashing the money at my to-be killer.

He grinned, "Hand it over girlie."

I shoved the money behind my back, "Shoot me first."

The grin vanished as the man stared at me with incredulity, "You were serious?" He whispered, "I thought I just scared ya into bringing back the money."

"The man I love has left me and I have no family to care. Call it taking the easy way out, but I can't keep this up without him and he chose another, knowing this." My voice cracked as tears finally began to escape freely. "There's three thousand dollars behind my back, I even bundled it together with my ponytail so it will be easier for you to grab, but please, kill me. I can't live being like this."

The pain I thought I felt for my parents' deaths were nothing compared to the pain I felt at Jesse's betrayal and rejection. The man I loved had torn out my heart and stomped all over it with a smile as he left me behind for his scared little mouse. Should I have cried more? Clung to him? Had him carry my books, open my sodas and help me up? If I had known these would have let him know that I needed him more than I needed air to breathe, I would have done them in a heartbeat, but instead, I wanted to be strong for him, to be independent for him and all it did was chase him into the arms of another woman.

"I can't do it." The man said, "Look, I didn't get this gun to kill people with, it's only supposed to scare you into giving me your money, I didn't think I'd ever get propositioned to kill!"

Looking up at him, I bit my lip and blinked back tears. "Please, I can't stand the thought of him with another woman and I promised him that I wouldn't kill myself. If it helps I'll run and you can shoot me for the cash, but please, just pull the trigger."

"Damn it!" He shouted, kicking the wall before rounding on me with the gun. "Are you sure, girlie? Once I pull the trigger at this range…there's no going back."

I nodded once, closing my eyes as I waited for the bullet. I could hear his breathing mixing with my own as I waited for the deafening sound of the bullet leaving the clip, but I never heard it. Maybe I became too focused on my own heartbeat or maybe he had a silencer on the gun, but I did feel the intense pain well up within my chest that caused my eyes to open in shock. Gasping, I dropped the money and stumbled back against the wall, my hands instinctively reaching for my chest where blood began to well up through my clothes.

The blurry image of a man passed by me, his footsteps echoing down the alleyway as he left me alone to die next to the trash. I didn't know it would hurt this much, but it was nice, comforting, to know there was a physical pain that could block out the emotional pain even if it was just for a little while.

A song began to play, low and muffled, but I knew it by heart. "Just close your eyes, the sun is going down. You'll be all right, no one can hurt you know." Groaning, I dug into my pocket and slowly took my phone out. I didn't even have to look at the screen to know who was calling me. "Come morning light, you and I'll be safe an—" Pressing the green button, I set the phone down in my lap as my vision began to go dark. "Jesse."

"Amy? Amy, where are you? It's 2:30 in the fucking morning and you're not home. I-I know this is hard, me being with Marie, but you're my best friend, Ames, and I still love you."

"I love you." I said brokenly, taking in a shuddering breath, "I'll love you for…"

"What, Amy? Ames, I love you too. Where are you? Amy? AMY!"

"We will always be best friends, Ames, always." He said, kissing me on the cheek before giving me a sorrowful smile and turning back to the cafeteria to join his new girlfriend. "Let's do a movie marathon this Saturday, okay?" He shouted over his shoulder before disappearing into the throng of people.

I closed my eyes, a smile gracing my lips as I thought back to the first time we had met. He had trampled my sandcastle and I had pushed him into a mud puddle. He decided I was "cool" and announced me as his best friend and then grabbed my hand to pull me up to the slides. We were inseparable from that day forward, until tonight, no longer were we inseparable for I would no longer be alive.

"We will always be best friends…"

The Mid-Post, Saturday Edition

"Amy Kyver, 18, was found shot to death Thursday morning in an alley in downtown Middletown, which is known for drug deals and prostitution. While it is uncertain at this time why Ms. Kyver was in this area, it is rumored that her death is the result of a drug exchange gone bad.

According to the police, she had withdrawn a large amount of money minutes before her death, which coroners place to be around 2:35am on May 5th. It is also reported that she had no drugs or alcohol in her system at the time of death nor were there any signs of previous drug abuse. The police are investigating Brigham Academy, from which young Amy Kyver was set to graduate from this June, to see if a possible excessive workload could be the reason behind this young, vivacious girl's turn to drugs.

Many may remember Ms. Kyver's parents, Peter and Sarah Kyver of the Kyver Textile Company, who died in a tragic jet accident four years ago. There are no surviving relatives and it is unclear at this time who will inherit the multi-million dollar textile business.

No comment could be reached from any of Ms. Kyver's friends, but Brigham Academy did release this statement: "We are all grieving the shocking and sudden loss of Amy Kyver and all classes have been suspended today as we come to terms with her death. We are cooperating fully with the police and are reviewing with students and teachers to see if the workload of this school is too heavy, we are appalled at the idea that our school is the reason for Ms. Kyver's death. In our 150 year history, this is the first case in which a student's death has called our school into question and we promise to take any steps necessary to make sure that such a tragedy never happens again. Thank you."

The police have requested for anyone who may have witnessed Ms. Kyver's murder to step forward and offer their information, there is a reward for any information given that will lead to the arrest of the murderer.

Funeral arrangements have been made, but it is a private ceremony and not open to the public."

Song lyrics by Taylor Swift "Safe And Sound"

And there it is, hope you guys liked it. Later! Death *kiss, kiss*