It's been a while since someone's asked me if I'm okay.

But then, it's been a while since I've told you
"I'm sorry."

And if someone reads this, they'll ask
but it's artificial
and I'll say "yes" even though we all know that's not
the answer.

Because I wrote without realizing what I did, and
you're still here, but "I can't find you!"
I CAN'T FIND YOU!

"That's because you're alone," you say softly to me,
and I see you. But you're smiling as you say it and I know
we'll never drink together…

And I need more.