Yeah, I know. I have a bunch of FictionPress and FanFiction stories that have to be updated. But I had to write this.
Thanks to Luna Ray aka Destiny (on FanFiction) for the title and summary. Love you! :D
So, I hope you guys like this. I might make this a series of one-shots on school life. Please review!
You didn't thank me for your birthday gift," she says, chuckling.
"I thanked you online," he points out, smiling slightly.
She shrugs, smiling back. "Yeah."
She turns around, reading something on the soft-board. He probably thinks she is upset.
"Oh okay come on," he says, walking over to her.
She turns around and he wraps his arms around her. She smiles and hugs him back, pulling him closer. They are inseparable, always there for each other - the best of friends.
She lets out all the things that have been bothering her, because his arms around her comfort her and take all the pain away. She whimpers softly.
"Why are you crying?" he whispers.
"I just...miss him."
She is referring to her first ex. He says nothing and holds her tighter. She buries her face in his chest.
They stay like that for what seems like ages. She looks up at him, feeling his gaze down at her. His eyes stare into hers, and she is locked. They are so intense and they seem almost...pained. She wonders why and projects the question to him. In response, he leans closer to her face. She puts her head on his shoulder and nuzzles into his neck.
Centimeter by centimeter, he leans closer to her, his eyes somewhere close to her mouth, face angled downwards. Instinctively, she knows. Because this is how she'd kissed him on 29th - a day that had rocked their relationship. She lets him come closer and lifts her face to look at him, moving forward the slightest bit. He keeps coming closer to her. And she can't hold back either. Without knowing it, she moves towards him.
Their lips brush.
She freezes. He pauses.
For the first time, he takes charge. He kisses her. Softly at first, gauging her reaction maybe. But she kisses him back, giving in. She knows she misses him that way sometimes, even though they're just best friends.
But what are they now?
What are they now that they are kissing so enthusiastically, tongues playing around in their mouths? What are they now that they're tangled up in each other, holding each other so close? Why is this happening?
Is it because they are both hurting over somebody else? Or is it because they'd never completely moved on? Is it because of the hormones?
She isn't sure. But even as these questions run in her head, she kisses him.
"I love you," he whispers as they pull away.
I don't know where, confused about how as well, just know that these things will never change for us at all.
Chasing Cars. That is their song. It fits them. And that line plays in her head. At least this is something she knows, even if she is clueless about what they feel and what their relationship now is.
"I love you too," she whispers back, tilting her face up to kiss his cheek, but he captures her lips in another kiss.
There is no hesitation this time. It has been lost. They kiss eagerly; their lips can't get enough. He tightens his arms around her waist automatically, pulling her so close that there is no space between their bodies. She can feel his heart beating and their ragged breaths as she traces patterns onto his back with her long, thin fingertips.
He pulls away for breath. For a moment, they are silent. Her eyes close as she sighs contently in his arms and his lips brush against her hair.
"Where does this leave us now?" she asks him softly.
What a funny thing for her to notice that even though there is a seven-inch difference between their heights, she isn't as short as she feels after all.
"I don't know," he says. And his tone implies that he doesn't care.
He leans in once more for another kiss, and of course he gets it. They kiss for a very long time when a question forms in her head.
"Do you miss her?" she asks, referring to his ex-girlfriend, the ** who left him for a completely lame reason.
"Sometimes..." he replies.
"So you didn't get over me, then?"
Her surprise is audible in her voice.
"I just miss us sometimes," he says and they kiss again briefly.
"Truth be told," she murmurs. "I was jealous of her for some time."
He looks down at her and she feels the need to tell him that she is not lying.
"Honestly," she says assertively, looking him in the eyes. Her hair is in the way. She tries to shake it away because her hands are holding his shoulders, keeping him close to her.
He responds by kissing her once again. It goes on and on - she has never felt a kiss with him so strongly. They ignore the world and do whatever they want to; they are the kind of people who live life to the fullest, but this time, they are really feeling the moment, living in the present, not caring about the consequences. They know this will get awkward later. They know that they will not work out in a relationship because they cannot afford to lose each others friendship. They know all this, but they don't give a damn.
Because the moment is almost too good to be true. It feels surreal. It feels beautiful.
She is his best friend, the girl who'll go to the ends of the world for him, the girl who loves him more than anyone else does. Though she hasn't said the words as such, maybe he knows them deep inside his heart.
She is the girl with the wavy brown hair that is out of place more often than not and the chocolate brown eyes that he can read like an open book. She is the girl with the scarred arm and small hands that have held his whenever he's been in pain. She's the girl with the dark past and fragile heart.
She's the fighter with sharp words and fiery eyes who can't hear a word against the people she loves. She's the girl with the 'I don't care - I'm better off on my own' attitude and only he knows how messed up and broken inside she really is. She's the girl with the multiple personalities that set her apart from everyone else. She's the girl who'll laugh over things that don't make sense and liven you up with the energy emanating from her when she is happy.
She's the girl he clicked with instantly; the girl who he learnt about on those silent treks. She's the girl he has so much in common with; the girl who loves the rain and exactly the same music as him. She's the girl who's poetry he cannot critique because he loves every single piece. She's the girl who is one of the people he loves the most in the world.
She is the girl in his arms right now.
She is the girl whose mouth is pressed against his, kissing him despite all the confusion. She is the girl whose irregular breathing he can hear because she's so close. She is the girl who he is so close to - physically and emotionally.
He is her best friend, the boy who has stuck by her no matter what, the boy who loves her and can't afford to lose her.
He's the boy with the cute haircut that reminds her of her favourite anime. He's the boy with the brown eyes that are so deep, deep, deep that it's easy to get lost into them. He's the boy with the strong chest that she hides her face in to get away from the rest of the world. He's the boy with the gentle hands that have brushed her hair back from her face and tickled her relentlessly as she writhed around laughing. He has the scarred arm and fingertips because of the mistakes she made.
He's the boy who loves her even with how much she's hurt him. He's the mature boy who takes responsibility and gives results. He's the boy who always looks calm on the surface but underneath his emotions are so intense that it's almost like a storm. He is the boy with so much potential; he can do anything he wants to when he puts his mind to it. He is the boy who's heart is the purest, he is the boy who's judgment is strong, he is the boy who is her idol. He is the boy she looks up to as a brother sometimes, he is the person she wants to be like, he is her role model. He's the boy who deserves to be happy every second of his life because he is just so amazing.
He is the boy she used to think was completely boring but today finds herself a fool to have ever thought so. He is the boy who's friendship with her flourished starting a trip in the mountains and the need for a bodyguard against a mental stalker. He's the boy who has everything and nothing in common with her; he understands her completely, his personality is so very similar yet different to hers. He is the boy who means the world to her, he is the only person she trusts with her life, he is the one person she loves so much.
He is the boy holding her right now.
He is the boy whose lips are kissing hers gently but firmly. He is the boy who is holding her so close and sends warm feelings inside her that make her dizzy. He is the boy who makes her feel loved and wanted; he gives her a reason to stay. He is the closest to her heart because he has succeeded in opening her up when she has shut herself so tightly against the world for fear of getting hurt again.
They break the kiss and he pulls her tight against his chest. She hugs him back, able to feel only the gratitude of having him for her best friend. The scent of him - his deodorant, perhaps - engulfs her and she breathes in deeply, taking it in. She has her eyes closed and is surrounded by darkness, her senses active only to the sound of his breathing, the smell of his skin and the feeling of him holding her.
Slowly, he releases her. They look into each other's eyes.
There's no answer.
He has gone now for the field trip with the rest of his class while she watches her sister's sports day on this windy afternoon. His scent still clings to her and she breathes him in for a long time after the events of the morning, her mind clouded by thoughts of him.
She replays the scene again and again, rejoicing in how perfect it was.
But one question nags her.
What do I feel for him?
He is my best friend.
You don't kiss a best friend like that.
So do you have a crush on him?
She ponders on that.
No, no she doesn't. Because that just - happened. She doesn't feel for him as anything more than a friend.
What if it's like one of those cheesy movies where you don't know you love him? It is scarily similar.
...Shut up, will you? I'm not in love.
This is her internal argument.
I'm not in love.
I'm not in love.
I'm not in love.
The words repeat in her head as she looks for an explanation. Why does she care so much for him? You don't care this much about somebody unless you love them. Of course she loves him.
And then it hits her.
I love him. I'm just not in love with him.
The confusion clears as she understands the difference. It isn't wrong to care. It is natural.
The sudden kissing wasn't supposed to happen because best friends don't behave like that, but then again, it caught them both by surprise. It just - happened. There was nothing behind it.
Thinking over it again, she knows she is right. She knows that her feelings are shared by him. Because she knows him inside out.
~ You and me, all we need is each other, ~
That's why we, make a good you and me,
You know what I'm going to say before my mouth even makes a sound,
And that's why we make a good you and me,
I know from the sound of your breathing exactly what you are feeling,
This is why we make a good you and me,
Make a good you and me,
Make a good you and me,
You and me.
Thanks for reading. A little review will make me really happy, so it'd be nice if you'd do that. I appreciate constructive criticism.
~ I Tripped Over Reality