My whole life as been a cliché. You think that I would have been used to it by now but things have gotten worse. Ever since I was a kid I noticed that all the other children did not expect much from me. I was the expected, normal. I wasn't like Harry who came to school every day with his hair in a disheveled and disorganized mess but still managed to different and new. I wasn't like Deena who was always blasting some new hip hop music from her headphones and coming up with new moves to go along with them. Don't get me wrong I was popular, like queen bee popular, but for some odd reason it didn't satisfy me. I wasn't (isn't) a bitch or anything but it all got pretty boring after a while. Everyone wanted me to become something that I wasn't. My parents wanted me to be the genius that they were. My peers wanted me to be the one that started all the trends, wore the newest and hottest clothes. Be cool. I just wasn't (still aren't) ready for all of that. My older siblings Joshua and Jessica were no help because they were the power twins and lived up to the family's values of good grades, athletic skills, and looks. They paved a road for me to follow in mute silence which is a lot to ask of a person like me since I just can't seem to shut up at times. Our family was the blonde-haired blue-eyed type that lived on the outskirts of New York.

When I was a kid my parents made sure that I participated in every activity that there was to occupy my time. I took piano, violin, soccer, horse back, jazz, and ballet lessons. I don't even know if that's it (there's probably more), but what I did know was that they were trying to mold me into their image. Along with all of that tutors were hired to make sure that I was always one step ahead of my class. So in kindergarten when all the kids were learning how to put words together and sound them out I could read a chapter book without help.

So you have to understand me when I continue on. Standing in front of the 6'3 vampire right now seemed just about the most typical thing in the world. All I could think of was that book Twilight that was driving normal (note: I said normal) teenagers all around the world crazy with its tale of a vampire and human love affair along with a lonely love sick werewolf who liked to walk around shirtless. So I just said to the vampire-who I am surprised did not sparkle in the sun-

"Look can you get out of my way?" He was standing in the middle of the path and I needed to get by him to finish my jog. Oh and yeah did I mention that I'm in the woods? Well it seems like it's the place to meet all the mystical creatures that pop out of story books.

I think that for a moment he was shocked then he said, "You aren't scared?"

"No." I replied my voice monotone. "Do you want me to be scared though? I could scream really loud if you want me to."

"Excuse me?" The vampire whose name I really hope is not Edward or Damian asked.

"Well you seemed surprised that I didn't go off screaming in the other direction that there is a vampire."

"Yeah back to that. Why aren't you screaming again?"

"You know that your self esteem is quite high there buddy. You know that you're not scary right?" I stated.

"Not scary?" He repeated. I really hope that he doesn't have a learning disability or anything because it seems like he doesn't understand a lot of the things I'm saying.

"Um yeah. So if we could get this conversation moving because I would really like to get by you." I gestured to the path.

"This isn't normal though." He muttered his eyes piercing into my own. "You're supposed to be scared and cringing in fear while I loom over you with piercing red predator eyes that you find yourself hypnotized by." He sounded really disappointed. Almost like a child who just found out that it would rain on his birthday and the celebrations would have to cease. But unfortunately for him I wasn't very considerate of this and broke out into laughter. Soon enough mascara streaked tears were running down my face and I had suddenly developed hiccups.

"Oh god (hiccup) you're so (hiccup) hilarious. Never thought (hiccup) I would see (hiccup) Edward come to life. Please tell me that you're name isn't 'Edward'." As I said all of this he glared at me with a hint of anger. Maybe he really was mad that I hadn't run off screaming into the woods and had challenged his vampire skills.

"You do realize that I could have killed you in the time that you were laughing your eyes out right?"

"Yeah but you (hiccup) didn't." I replied leaning against the rock behind me to calm down.

"Let me guess. You think that I'm a good vampire right? And that I wont hurt you?" His tone was condescending and cocky.

"Well are you?" I asked dryly.


"Depends on what?" I questioned curiously.

"On your definition of 'good'."

"Interesting," I muttered sliding down the rock and onto the dirt floor.

"Well what do you think I am though?" He asked his tall frame looming over me. I guess he got at least one part of his fantasy.

"Not scary." I repeated again.

"Seriously?" He asked incredulously. "You weren't scared of me one bit?"

"Nope!" I said popping the last syllable.

"Great," he muttered kicking the dirt with his feet and sitting down on the ground next to me. He wasn't totally cold though. He must have just had a meal…poor guy.

"Look I have an idea." He raided his eyebrows but said nothing. "Well more like an exchange. I can help you become the scary and ethereal and all that crap. In fact I'll give you three weeks of my valuable time to train you on how to be a good and not lame vampire. All you have to do in exchange is let me pass by."

"And how are you supposed to do that? You know nothing about vampirism."

"Well for one I know that the whole burning in the sun's not true." I gestured over our heads were the sun was beating down. "And I have also ruled out the whole sparkling thing."

"Fine. But I want to add something."

"What?" I asked cautiously. By now I guess that my brain had just picked up that I could actually be in danger.

"I have to go to your school and be around normal kids."

"Fine." I said after a couple of seconds. "Now use your vampire powers to get me home.