there are people out there
i can see who take enjoyment from
such simple things as
roses and love songs, perfect things in
all shades of gray,
gradient, blissful serenity with aspirations
for despair.

i used to live like that,
too,
until the local undertaker took my body
down, down underground and
chopped me up, sold my limbs
on the black market and
used my organs, my heart, to
reanimate his dead never-lover.

i was saved, but really just
shook awake to
live in a
blackandwhite world with
flooded and frozen morality
i'm so jaded
so impossibly jaded
i miss the days when
"everything was beautiful and
nothing hurt."

i miss when my dreams of forever sleep were still
nightmares.