Fazed

And you ask yourself:
"What am I doing?"
"What is my purpose?"
"Why can't I do this?"
"What do I want, really?"
"What can I do?"
"Am I this worthless?"
"Why can't I figure it out?"
"When will it be enough…"

Someone tells you to "grow up"
But you can't because it's so hard
You're just not "there" yet.

Before you wanted to hurry and get older
Now you want to forget everything
And crawl back under the covers
Where everything is just a dream.

You find some form of escape
And lose yourself, telling yourself that somehow
It'll all be okay
But each time you'll just circle back around
Because reality is where you exist.

At times you can feel so strong
But your unease is all held behind a mask
You wish you knew what to do.

You feel the pressure from others:
From peers
From teachers
From family
From people…
From expectations
From yourself
From this world
From life itself.

You wish everything would just stop
You want to live in your imagination
Where everything works out one way or another.

You wonder if you give up too easily
You wonder if your choices are right
You wonder if your future will be all right.

You want to cry everything out
You want to wander
But you're afraid to stray of the path
You don't want to get lost.

You don't know when you can be at ease
Because it feels like everything piles on so quickly
You begin to feel like you don't care.

Someone calls your name
And immediately you put on your mask
Because you're not yet ready to face the world.

In this vast world you feel so alone
You're just waiting
Waiting for someone to tell you
"You're okay"
So that you can tell yourself
"I'm okay."