I want to be writer and travel the world and write my experiences. I want to live on the streets for a month and write what it feels like, I want to share with the world my fears that I'm asexual in a coulture that values sex most of all.
I want to make music and be able to sing my feelings.
I want to be a doctor and save peoples lives every day. I want to work in a clinic and help all the street people, maybe work rehab with the sorry, broken people. I want to be an EMT and give people back a life I kept them from throwing away.
I want to be a therapist and hear the worlds problems, make people realize its easy to solve them, feel like my life had some meaning.
But I don't realy want to do any of those things. I want to live on the sea and not deal woth the world problems, I don't give a damn whose in the whte house or why gas is costly. It makes m sad that the sunnis are fighting tht people are dying and I'm doing nothing that we're killing the polar bears and the bayous and forests.
And I wish I didn't know that things were so bad because when I look at the sunset I can't help but feel glad and watching the kids building castles of sand akes me smile. I still think that shooting stars are magic and wishing on them is more than justg habit. I've never been more at peace then when I'm in the woods. With a fire crackling. as the night grows cool and ears of corn roasting, you know it wont be long till someone breaks out marshmellows and chocolate,
voices grow quiet and talk turns serious laughter burst forth for some silly reason and as someone starts singing or strumming there guitar it seems that nothing has changed in thousands of years. as embers shoot up to the starry sky I wonder, why I can't I just stay like this forever? Why do I have to put on a suit and a tie, or high heels and stockings. Why did we ever stop farming and start building cities? Cuz the crickets make music more pretty than traffic and I'd rather play in a gurgling brook then a McDonalds playstation.
I'm just looking for the beuty in the world but I don't see it where I am, and I don't see it where I'm going. I see it in the woods and the ocean, in music and dancing , sunise and sunsets and big starry night skies. So what do I do? Cuz I've been told I can do anything. The sky is the limit and I can be whatever I like. But the question is can I be nothing? Would that be alright?