It's hard to understand, to piece together. Inside, there's always two parts of you that fight to control, attacking one another, like siblings that don't get along. It's hard to make sense of these feelings, whatever they may be. Sometimes, the feeling of confusion is addictive, and the great sense of relief and satisfaction once the two parts fit. But for it to go wrong would destroy everything, shattering the self confidence that was building up ever so slowly. Next thing you know, you're at the very bottom of things, and people may think they're helping you when they give advice. It doesn't help. Maybe these feelings are there for a reason. We wouldn't be human if we didn't worry about things. Having the ability to reason and think outside instinct helps to prove who we are. But sometimes it would be so much simpler if no one bothered us with small emotions. I want an answer to the specific questions I ask myself. But of course, it's always so much easier to think of the question than making the answer. And so I will continue will these conflicting emotions and deal with them in a way that I think I should. Advice tells me that people care. It's a tough place to be, but it helps for future confusions. I will continue along this muddy path of mine, taking every misunderstanding as a miracle, and cheer greatly at the end, because I would know I made no short cuts.