I hope that you like this, it's my first story on here and if I get new ideas or a good reaction then I might post more one shots into this story but they'll range from funny stories, angst filled stories to a whole lot of fluff. It'll depend on my mood. This story is just a one shot that I made for a challenge on Polyvore and I thought that I could make it my first story for FictionPress. Anyway, here it is.
On with the story. Hit it!
P.S There are two quotes in here, I don't want to say them to give away the story, but they're from Never Shout Never's Lousy Truth and Arctic Monkey's Love is a Laserquest.
A drop in the ocean
A change in the weather
I was praying that you and me might end up together
It's like wishing for rain as I stand in the dessert
-A Drop in the Ocean, Ron Pope
There she was in all her beautiful glory, the cigarette dangling from her red lipstick coated lips and her messy bleached hair. She stubbed out her cigarette in the glass ashtray on the bar beside her that was already filled with a dozen or so cigarette stumps. She downed the glass of clear liquid that he guessed was vodka and hopped off the bar stools, the heels of her ankle boots clacking as she landed on the ground. Her eyes were scouting out prey and he shouldn't really be surprised, just because she was constantly racking up the notches on her bed posts, it was like some internal bet that she had with herself. Can I get three guys before next Tuesday? Can I get twins?
She tapped her heel against the floor and her eyebrow quirked up like it always did when she was in thought, somehow he knew that she wasn't fully there in that moment. Her eyes were searching the crowd but her mind was searching through her memories, the heartbreaking memories that nobody should have to face. It was then that he saw the flash in her eye, the ghost that haunted her nightmares and he can remember too many times when she'd awoke screaming, wrapped in sheets with sweat slick across her forehead and a scream dying in her throat.
"Miles?" Her voice somehow rang through the bodies pressed tightly to one another. He didn't know how she managed to fit so many emotions into a single word, but then again Tuscany had always accomplished the task of leaving him clueless. She pushed through the people on the dance floor, for such a small person she put up a good shove, and ignored the groaned insults shot her way.
"That's me," He said when all 5'0 ft of her tumbled into a stop in front of him, her heels giving an extra few inches. He could tell that her eyes were still shooting around the room from around his shoulder; he guessed old habits die hard or don't die at all. The look was vanished from her eyes, replacing the mask that she'd built up ever since the day that he broke her. Maybe that's why she did it; she broke other hearts to make up for hers.
Her eyes finally reached him and he could tell that she was giving him a once over, he was cursing the fact that he hadn't thought to put on his fancy shoes now, the ones that seemed to shine even if he didn't polish them. Her little pink tongue flicked out and ran along her lips, she reminded him of a beautiful snake. "Long time, no speak. Bored without me, Miles honey?" The word honey didn't seem to fit right on her lips.
"You could say that, things do tend to get dreary when Tuscany Rhodes has disappeared from your life." He answered and he thought she'd laugh; she always did like people commenting on how interesting life with her was. But she ignored him.
She took hold of his hand and dragged him behind her; he didn't think he'd be able to get away even if he'd wanted to. She pushed the door of the stuffy bar open and pulled him out with a sharp tug, she never was gentle with anything, before letting the door shut behind them. The harsh cold that only ever came with winter hit him in the face before he'd prepared and it momentarily knocked the wind out of him, but he regained his composure after stuffing his hands in his pockets and ignored the bite the cold gave. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jackets and wondered how she wasn't cold by her scantily clad outfit, he was sure that her thin ripped black tights didn't offer much coverage.
She led him down the cracked sidewalks with only the light from the streetlamps to guide them, the moon had hidden behind clouds and he couldn't blame him. It wasn't the best of nights. A few cars whipped by them in a blur, their headlights giving them a moment of bright light before it faded into the unknown darkness of the distance. The sky was murky and uninteresting, it seemed a lifetime ago that he'd sat with her in his arms under a star sprinkled sky in late July with them both wrapped up in just a sheet after she'd persuaded him to run away with her for the night, to sneak out of her cabin an just forget everything but them. Her words still rung in his head, "Don't you trust me, Miley?" as her laugh tinkled from her lips. He'd said yes then, he'd never in a million years say that now.
She stopped walking after several painfully silent moments (whenever he was with her everything but her seemed to turn down to mute, like a radio that was only equipped for her frequency.) Her hand moved up to clasp around his wrist, obviously hand holding was too intimate, and led him down a little gap way between two apartment blocks. They were plunged into darkness because the alley didn't provide the light that the street had and he was thankful that he hadn't been scared of the dark since he was eight. She took his shirt in between her hands and pushed him backwards until his back hit a wall, if he hadn't known that she was so against any sort of assault despite her criminal past then he'd be sure that he would be walking again tomorrow.
"Hmm... I've missed you," She spoke through the darkness and now that his eyes had adjusted to the low lighting he now found that he could see the shadow of her face. He could smell alcohol, cigarette and perfume; it was filling his nostrils and making him woozy. "No guy's ever really been like you."
"I bet you say that to all the boys," He managed to let the words float from his lips. He didn't know how he managed it because his heart was racing and his palms were sweaty because she was here and her hands were balling up his shirt and her smell was filling his whole body. He heard her laugh and saw the way her body shook slightly by her shadow.
"Possibly, but you're the only guy I've ever meant it about," He was deathly afraid of how much he hoped those words were true, "You won't believe me but I think I'm losing my touch..."
His breathing was getting caught and he hated how much of a love struck little girl he was around her, he swallowed and managed to breathe out the words, "Oh don't worry I'm sure that you're still breaking hearts with the efficiency that only youth can harness."
She laughed and he could see her shadow shaking her head, her laugh was like music that couldn't ever truly be appreciated unless you'd heard the belly laugh that she hadn't managed to keep in as she'd tilted her head back with her hair flowing down her back like a waterfall as the sound filled the air around them both. She wasn't belly laughing now; he could cope with this laugh. The laugh that she used when stupid guys made stupid jokes and she wanted the stupid idiots to be wrapped around her stupid finger. "Maybe, but I also find myself thinking that I might have liked you. That you weren't like the others."
And he knew that these were just words, just words murmured in a half drunken state to a guy that she knew she could get in a dark alley. Just words that would wrap him around her finger, but these words were working him under her spell and he didn't know whether he could say no to her if she asked, "You're chat up lines are getting worse," He struggled out but he knew he was growing weaker and he wouldn't be able to stand upright much longer. He'd buckle like he'd done before.
"You really are no good with compliments, are you M?" She let out and her face was growing closer and he could feel her warm breath was dancing across his neck and up to his cheeks. She got up onto her tiptoes and placed her mouth near to his ear, "I can feel your heart beating. Remember when you told me that it quickened whenever you saw me?"
He hated her in that moment, throwing back his words when she just wanted meaningless sex in an alley, he hated her because he knew that she would never love him and he hated her because he didn't. He couldn't possibly hate her because her face was the last thing he saw at night and her voice slipped into his dreams.
The single word was a beg and she could see that he was breaking, faltering, slipping. The word hung above them for several moments and they were both breathing heavily and she could feel it tickling her skin. She closed the distance between them and her lips were on his, soft and gentle and challenging him to deny her of this. She kissed him in a way that she'd never kissed anyone, slow, sweet and fleeting. She pulled away and a smile was pulling up the corners of her lips.
"Please stop. I can't just be a hook up for you..." His voice trailed off and she could hear what he left unspoken, about his feelings and his emotions and the stuff she'd never cared about. "I just can't, T."
She took a step back and he thought that she was going to walk away, forget about him and he'd never see her again. Maybe they were both selfish, she'd take what she wanted from him without sparing his feelings and he wouldn't give her what she wanted but desperately want her to stay with him. But she didn't leave him. She got out a cigarette and a lighter from down her bra, lit the cigarette and popped it into her mouth. She took a drag on it and let the smoke billow from her lips to get carried away with the wind. With the little light from the lighter he could make out the pale white of a scar along her wrist. One caused by glass, one that he'd traced as they lay in bed with one another. He knew that she'd got so many other scars and he hated it. He hated that someone had made her so damaged.
"You don't like me, not really," She started as she looked up at him, flicking the ash from the end of the cigarette and the glow made her face look sort of demented in a weirdly beautiful way, "You just like the idea of me. All the guys do. You like that I'm distant and unreachable, that I'm this challenge that you won't fully get. You make it a goal to get me to fall madly in love with you. You like the chase, not the catch."
It was the first thing she'd said to him that really mattered all that much since the day that they'd crept away from the group of people going on a hike with the tour guides and they'd sat by the lake on a frayed old picnic blanket that she'd found in her room which must have belonged to whoever stayed there last. She'd told him things that he doubted that all that many had heard and he'd felt special. But then it had been back to the normal routine and he hadn't seen that girl until now.
"To be honest, you're just a girl with some issues, as bad as it may sound but you're the girl who's been driving me mad. You're not perfect and you're damaged, but that's just you and it's that that has kept me awake at night. It wasn't the fact that you're a challenge, it's the fact that underneath all of your bravado you're just a little girl that wants to be loved..." He trailed off and watched as she took another puff of her cigarette before dropping it to the floor and stamping it out with her foot. She returned the lighter to her bra and he almost missed the nod of her head, he didn't know whether she was accepting what he'd said or just felt that she had to do something.
"Maybe, but you deserve better than me. You're such a great guy and like you said, I'm damaged goods. You deserve the best produce from that aisle in the supermarkets that the posh totties head straight to, with the lobster and the caviar," She let out a laugh like she couldn't believe what she'd just said. She probably couldn't. He knew that he should deny it, lay out the flatteries and say that she's amazing and that any guy would be lucky to have her. But she wouldn't believe him, just like he didn't believe her when she said that he was different.
"I guess that I'm not getting laid, am I?"
"'Fraid not," He let a chuckle slip past his lips because he was so thankful in that moment that she was who she was because he hated this distance between them. These words. He wanted an 'I love you' shared even if that was painfully selfish and inappropriate. But in the end, he knew that it'd always be there. The distance would always be there. The words would be thought even if they weren't spoken aloud. They'd never be together and after tonight he doubted whether he'd ever see her again, they were too different. She was the night's sky and he was the day light. She'd never think that she was good enough and she'd never be able to give up the strings of one night stands.
"If I was going to love anyone, it'd be you," She told him and then leaned closer like she had just minutes before, placing her mouth near his ear and lowered her voice so that he almost couldn't hear her, "Close your eyes."
He thought that she was going to kiss him so he closed his eyes and awaited her cold lips on his, waited to taste vodka and cigarette, but it never came. He opened his eyes and he was standing in the alley alone, Tuscany Rhodes was nowhere in sight. He knew better than to shout out for her, to run after her, because even if he found her then it'd be against her wishes. She didn't have the longest of fuses. This was her goodbye, her way of saying that they needed to cut the ties so that it didn't hurt so much. He had a sore feeling in his chest and although he knew that heartbreak was all in your head, this was pretty close. If hearts shattered, then his would be in shards. As he turned to look up at the sky he could see the grey dimness that warned of the arrival of the sun. It seemed fitting.
Their story was just as good a love story as any. Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with girl. Girl doesn't believe in love and wouldn't let herself even if she did. Girl leaves boy. The end. He knew that not all stories had a happily ever after.
So there it is, I hope that you liked it but if you didn't then constructive criticism is always welcome. Thanks for getting this far, I appreciate you for baring with me. The song lyrics I mentioned were:
"You're just a girl with some issues as bad as it might sound. But you're the girl who's been driving me mad."- Lousy Truth, Never Shout Never
"Don't worry, I'm sure that you're still breaking hearts. With the efficiency that only youth can harness."- Love is a Laserquest, Arctic Monkeys