"The Invisible Girl"

You don't see her,

You don't hear her nor

Feel her grip.

She looks like a child,

Pure and appealing

Nothing like the adults

Sick and degraded.

She stands silent in the corner,

Looking at the table; you feel her there.

She stares into your soul

Testing your loyalty.

You look through the glass

Seeing her; but never saying a word.

She wins your obedience through promises.

Feeling your insides coil, hair fall out

Skin turn yellow.

Her knife plunges deep into your heart,

Binding your soul to her enticing ideas.

She smiles as your bones start to show,

Muscles wasting away from your efforts.

That invisible girl keeps me on track;

Makes porcelain my sister, cold water my friend.

She makes me go the extra mile

When I fall she picks me up.

The pain strikes the inner core of my being

Yet i can't stop;

Don't want to stop.

She loves me, that invisible girl.

She'll never leave me.

The more I glance at her;

Hear her silent words,

The tighter the snare entraps my soul.

She went from invisible to my only friend.

My world centers around her,

I love this girl; this unseen force.

On my knees I beg her forgiveness

Purging the feelings, thoughts, and deadly toxin.

Showing me what poisons to stay away from,

But I disobey.

After I crave the fatal hazards,

I crawl back to her solitude

When she shows me the media;

I see their hype and horrid views.

I need her to guide me,

My large shell of a body.

To drop numbers into the negatives,

Skip to the summer sizes.

I want to feel her emptiness consume me.

That invisible child cold and cruel,

Invisible child I need you.

Invisible child fix me please;

I love and I live but nothing

Feels as good as the hope you give.

When she is done my shell withers away;

A casket bears my future,

Unless I find the key to her chains.

But for those who never do,

She has an eternal bed for you.

The invisible girl in the corner

Is now my master and keeper.

My ultimate outlet, my goal prize.

She will make me loved

Through pain and dedication;

She gives me hope of being accepted.

So; here's to you invisible girl,

Even though I know your name.

Girl who is nameless

You have two souls.

Two abled killers in one

Unheard and unseen girl

The twins in one

That no one sees,

How can you be such a God to me?

Please keep me close,

My bones closer

My soul in your shackles

And my brain in your clutches.

Don't let them take you away from me,

I don't care what they say.

I love you Ana and Mia,

My girls,

Love me until you kill me,

Invisible girls.

-Angelika Koehler (age 16)

May 29, 2012