One day a woman fell in love
with a man &
wanted the syllables of
her name to belong
on his tongue. she believed
it would give her the chance
to escape, pretend she wasn't here but
there, someplace else where
white powder didn't look so horrifying on her
upturned nose
& the alcohol she bought didn't make her speech
slurred. but the man didn't work, nothing worked so
she tried cigarettes & they didn't help her breathe,
only made breathing worse. So she
fell in love with a different man,
who was worse than the others but better
than the others & it worked for awhile.
he bought her exotic pills of cotton candy colors
that made everything not hurt so much when
he touched her, but the bruises he left
weren't such a great color so she tried to cover them up
& it worked for awhile. until the pills ran out & the bruises
were too big & the man left her for another woman,
prettier smarter better
than she was
& her chest ached so bad she wanted to cry.
So she cried for hours & days & months & waited for
the man to come back, the one who meant something
or maybe everything to her,
but he was gone, nowhere to be found, &
this time her chest ached so bad
the only thing she wanted was to find a way
out. So one day, another day, she

writer's block, i guess.