Thinking Sarcasm and Love

Haley Denton tried not to lose her patience with Terrence Lee. She tried to concentrate on her work on one of the computers in the library but she couldn't just ignore him while he chanted her name over and over again. She really wanted to inflict serious bodily harm on him because he was dissing her again.

"Are you doing the essay on History, Hales?" he asked as he spun round and round on one of the computer chairs beside her.

"Yes, I'm doing the essay," she answered through clenched teeth. Ignoring him would just make him more annoying. "And yes, I want to hurt someone. And don't call me Hales."

"He's probably going to copy on you, Haley," one of the guys in her class, who was also working on his essay, told her.

"I'm doing my essay unlike you, you stupid smart bastard," Terrence barked at him. "I bet you're just laughing your ass off because I'm "slow". Well, screw you Einstein!"

But then, he slid his chair closer to her classmate and grinned apologetically.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that… Hey, can I copy your essay?"

"No way," he replied with a superior smirk on his face.

"Stupid, conceited prick," Terrence muttered and turned to Haley again. "Hey, can I-"

"No," she said, throwing him a disgusted look. "You're insane if you think I would."

Terrence grinned at her which served to irritate her more.

"You're just jealous because the voices talk to me!"

She huffed.

"I hear voices and unfortunately, they don't like you!"

"I don't know what your problem is," Terrence said irritably, folding his arms together, "but I bet it would be hard to pronounce."

"Why, you—"

"I want both of you out of the library, now!"

Haley and Terrence looked up at the librarian who was appeared furious. She pointed the doors of the library and Haley had no choice but to get out. The librarian was not somebody you could just argue with. She packed up her things sullenly while Terrence made a small bow at the librarian before going out.

"Haley," he began but was cut off by a seething Haley.

"Shut up! Just shut up!" she snapped with a glare. "Look at what you did! We don't even have History together. Do we have the same teacher in History, though?"

"No," he replied unaffectedly.

Haley's mouth gaped open.


"I said, no," he told her cheerfully. "See you around, Haley," he continued with a salute before scampering away.

Haley let out a frustrated growl. She couldn't believe his nerve. He cost her her essay this time! She wanted to pound him until he was dead but since he was gone, hiding somewhere from her, she couldn't. And wouldn't.

Haley sighed instead and trudged outside to the school lawn. She dropped her things under a tree and sat, making sure her skirt wasn't revealing anything underneath it. She leaned back into the tree and closed her eyes.

She was harboring a crush on Terrence, had always been since freshman year when they were partners in a Science experiment. She found him cute with his messy black hair and green, mischievous eyes. He also had a lean, muscular body and an impish smile that the girls found hot. But even if girls throw themselves at them, he never seemed to reciprocate their interest. She heard that he was a misogynist but she never believed it because he was always kind and friendly whenever they got together for their project. He even nicknamed her Hales.

When the school year was over, Haley was dismayed. Her link to Terrence was gone and they were back to being strangers. They didn't have any class together during sophomore year and Haley had to content herself with seeing him in the halls or cafeteria. But sometimes, she would catch Terrence looking at her. She wasn't sure he did because he would turn his gaze away like their eyes didn't meet and acted as if nothing was wrong.

Now they were juniors in high school. And it was just a few months ago when Terrence began taunting her. He always tried to rile her up and always succeeded. She didn't know why when just a few months ago, they weren't even friendly with each other. But now, he acted like he had known her forever and always clowning around. It was amusing at first but got downright irritating after a while. Haley didn't know why he was doing it and maybe she never will.

"You are such a kid, Terrence," Sam said.

"What did I do?" Terrence asked indignantly. "That wasn't your sandwich I just ate, right?'

"We heard what happened in the library," Nico told him as he leaned back into his chair. "And no, that was my sandwich, you dork."

"Don't you get smart on me."

"If I got smart with you, how would you know?"

Carl slammed his fist on his desk to make both of them shut up.

"If you're just going to be noisy," Carl said through clenched teeth. "I suggest you all leave my office. How many times do I have to tell you that my office is not a lounging area?"

Terrence snorted.

"This isn't an office," he argued. "It's hell with fluorescent lighting."

Carl glared at him furiously that Terrence had to shut up if he wanted his face intact.

"Chill, dude," Nico said. "We're just making sure you won't get lonely since Lyssa couldn't come here because of the math decathlon. And Terrence, stop aggravating Carl."

"Hey, you're the one who's causing all this commotion, not me."

"Enough!" Sam bellowed. "If you're just going to be sarcastic all throughout lunch," Sam said to Terrence, "I suggest you do leave."

Terrence muttered under his breath but left the room, slamming the door behind him. Carl cursed. Sam sighed.

"Just leave him be," Sam said in a bored tone.

"Well, I can't leave him alone if he goes making trouble everywhere," Carl growled but then sighed. "Seriously, why is he acting like a retard again?"

"One word," Nico told him. "Or a name, rather."

"Haley," they all said with a sigh.

"Nice perfume, Hales. But must you marinate in it?"

Haley stiffened. But when she turned to look at Terrence, she had a pleasant smile plastered on her face.

"Oh, stop it, you," she said with a giggle before rolling her eyes skyward and muttered, "I've been using this for years, Terrence. Go away."

"I can't." Terrence sniffed at her again and then acted as if he was trying not to gag. "Because you smell awful and I'm concerned."

Haley gave him a forced smile.

"Oh, you don't need to concern yourself, Terrence-poo," she cooed at him, pinching his cheeks for effect. "In fact, the only person who should be concerned is the guy I like. I was hoping he'd notice and in fact, he did."

"Terrence-poo?" he said, looking disgusted. "And what guy? Are you trying to lure him with that awful swamp smell?" He shook his head sadly. "You know, good ideas aren't as common as stupid people think."

"Shut up," she snapped. "I know he likes my perfume. Just… Just back off!"

"Then he must a swamp monster. Or maybe he just noticed you because of that nauseating, god-awful smell since you definitely reek of it."

Haley growled and tried to smack him but Terrence dodged her.

"I hate you!" she spat at him before she spun around and walked away, leaving Terrence who was still laughing aloud.

A guy, huh, Terrence thought furiously as he stared at her while she walked away. Who the heck was that guy?

Terrence turned and went the other way. He got the keys of the rooftop of the school from his backpack and went there. He had swiped the keys from the school janitor, duplicated them and used them for any purpose that served him like now. He dropped his body to the floor and laid there, folding his arms behind his head and stared at the sky.

Terrence knew that Haley thought she wasn't pretty enough to catch any guy's interest because he made sure nobody would. All of the other guys knew that if they messed with Haley, they messed with Terrence. And Terrence would never fail to mess them up if they did.

Terrence was a formidable enemy. Guys who didn't heed his warning ended up having their locker trashed with disgusting, rotten fruits and vegetables. Or got splashed with red paint from above. Or found their bags and gym shoes full of strawberry jam. And the list went on. They never had evidence that Terrence had done all of it but they got the message. And Haley was oblivious to all of it.

Haley. His Haley. He fell in love with her when they were in freshmen year and partners in class. He always told her cheesy jokes that no one else appreciated except her. He loved her gray eyes and her short, curly brown hair. He loved to see her smile at him and he loved the cute way she would blush when their hands touched. He loved the way she laughed when he acted like a clown and he loved how she would scold him when he played a little prank on someone, only to laugh when he told her the amusing details. She was his first love.

But things got awkward when the year ended. They were never friends in the first place and he didn't know how to befriend her because he was shy. Yes, he was shy. The great menace of the teachers and the other students was shy when it came to girls. That's why he never mingled with girls because he didn't know how to deal with them.

But with Haley, it was natural. When she was around, he felt like he could be himself and it felt great. He never felt stupid when he was with her because she never judged him. And losing her made him feel sad and lonely that's why he turned into a prankster and troublemaker to make those feelings go away somehow.

And when he couldn't take it anymore, he finally started to talk to her. But instead of a conversation, he would taunt her instead because he would get nervous and turn mean as a defense mechanism. It seemed the only way he could gain her attention was to annoy her. He still wasn't contented with it because he wanted to see her smile at him and talk like they used to.

Terrence recalled Haley's perfume and in actual fact, he really liked it. It was a nice scent of roses and jasmine. She was already using it when they first met. But he needed another excuse to be close to her so he made fun of it.

"You're dead if Carl finds out you're playing hooky and coming here again."

Terrence glanced at Nico who was smiling down at him.

"Go away."

Nico sighed.

"Stop being an idiot, Terrence." Nico crouched on the floor beside him. "You like that girl you've been constantly teasing, don't you?"

"No, I don't," he denied without meeting his eyes.

Nico snorted.

"Yeah, right," he said. "You don't like her but you're acting like a pre-schooler tormenting his first puppy love. Come on, man," he poked Terrence's shoulder, "Stop being a wuss."

"I am not being a wuss," Terrence replied through clenched teeth. "I'm just biding my time."

Nico exhaled loudly and stood up.

"I think she likes you, too."

"If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong," Terrence told him. "She hates me, Nico. She told me herself."

Nico shrugged.

"You were friendly with each other back then. You can at least try, Terrence. I'll help you. We'll all help you. We got your back, man, just like you did with ours." Nico wagged his eyebrows at him. "And we're hoping that having a girlfriend will make you grow up and stop being an idiot."

Terrence huffed and then looked at him seriously.

"If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me."

Nico grinned.

"Just be yourself."

"So you're telling me that being my sarcastic self is going to help me?" Terrence rolled his eyes at him. "Best idea ever."

"Come on, dude," Nico said, pushing Terrence from behind. "Just go already."

"I can't do it, guys!" Terrence gasped, holding on to Carl who was trying to make him let go of him. "I think I'm gonna hurl."

"Let go!"

"Let me," Sam interjected, cracking his knuckles. "Don't screw this up, Terrence."

Terrence found himself lifted off the ground and thrown out from behind his car. He regained his balance but found himself faced to faced with Haley.

"Your earrings make a great fishing lure, by the way," he said before he could stop himself. He heard his friends groan and he wanted to smack himself on the face. He couldn't believe he began taunting her without even knowing it. Old habits die hard, he guessed.

"And your presence is enough to make a person crazy," Haley shot back as she tugged on her ears. They were both in the school front and it was quite deserted save for them since Haley had to stay late in school. She didn't know why Terrence was still here and why his friends were hiding behind a car.

Terrence smiled cheekily at her and tilted his head to one side.

"Crazy in love?"

"You wish," she huffed and tried to walk past him but he blocked her. "Move, jerk."

"I can't. It's late and I want to make sure you get home safely," he stated matter of factly.

"Oh, you're good." Haley gave him a suspicious look. "State your business and leave me alone."

Terrence frowned.

"Do I have to have an ulterior motive just to send you home safely? There's no bus anymore. We can take my car," he explained then grinned at her. "And smile, Hales. That's the second best thing you can do with your lips, you know."

Haley growled at him but he didn't look intimidated. Instead, he looked amused. Haley stared at him, willing him to go away but he only stared back at her. She exhaled slowly.

"What did I ever do to deserve this," she complained to the sky, throwing her hands up.

"Don't blame yourself." He patted her head while she sulked. "Let me do it instead."

Haley glared at him and smacked his hand away.

"You are so infuriating," she muttered angrily. "Why can't you just leave me alone?" She frowned at Terrence thoughtfully. "Maybe you like me, don't you?"

Haley braced herself for a denial. But inside, she wished he'd say yes. That's why she didn't anticipate his answer and it stunned her.

"What makes you think I don't?" he said so fast, that his words sounded gibberish. "I do like you."

Haley blinked. She watched as Terrence's face turned red and averted his face from her.

"I'm not fluent in idiot, so please speak slowly and clearly," Haley said, trying to peer at his face but he bobbed his head up. "I distinctly heard a sort of confession from you and I'm not certain I heard you correctly."

"You did hear me correctly," he mumbled.

Haley leaned away from him, looking confused.

"You really like me?"

"I just told you, didn't I?" Terrence replied, finally looking at her. He folded his arms. "I like you Haley. I liked you for a very long time already."

Haley became infuriated by his flippant answer. All those months of torment from him and all along he felt the same way. She couldn't believe it. She was happy but she still couldn't help but get mad at him

"Then why can't you ask me out like a normal, regular guy?" She spat at him. "But, no. Instead, you have to be a total jerk to me."

"Well, I'm not a normal, regular guy!" he snapped back at her. "And, I don't know how!"

"You… You don't know how?" Haley smacked his arm and she looked so indignant that Terrence cowered. "Flowers. Chocolates. Some poetry if you feel all poetic. A nice, romantic date for two. A big, hideous looking stuffed animal if you have to. You seriously have never thought of those?"

"I did," Terrence said morosely. "Remember that time I gave you a rose?"

"Yeah!" she snarled, her voice rising. "It had a freaking caterpillar on it!"

He winced visibly.

"And how about those chocolates I snuck in your bag?"

"They were crushed by my books! And they stained my Math assignment that I couldn't even hand them to my teacher!"

Terrence heard guffaws and he reddened even more. Great. They were totally enjoying this, he thought. They were the ones who whined and pushed and threatened him to do this and now, they were laughing at his shame.

His head dropped sullenly.

"I tried to invite you for a date," he said surly. "But that involved asking you out and I was scared you would reject me."

"What's the use of having friends if you can't even ask their help! You're even best friends with the school pres!"

"Hey! It's not our fault he's such a pussy!" Carl shouted from behind the car.

"Why didn't you just take the risk?" Haley demanded, ignoring Carl. "Why didn't you just man up? We could have been together already instead of you hounding me!"

"Wait." He looked at her with hope in his eyes. "Are you telling me you like me, too? What about that guy you told me you liked?"

"It was you, you sadistic moron!" she shouted at him, jabbing a finger on his chest. "And I do like you!"

"Then, why don't you sound happy?" he shouted back.

"I am happy, stupid!" Haley's eyes welled with tears. "I just couldn't believe it."

Terrence laughed and she glared at him through her tears. He gave her an apologetic grin and took her in his arms. He reveled the feeling of being close to her once more and he felt blissful.

"Are they still there?" Haley asked meekly after a while.

Terrence glanced up and saw that they already have left, seeing the fun part was over. He kissed her temple and tilted her head up.

"Don't worry about what other people think, Hales," he said impishly. "They don't do it very often."

Haley rolled his eyes at him. His sarcastic nature would never change. But, she thought, she'll make sure his trouble making days would be over. Hopefully.

Author's Note:

Do you guys like it? ;)

Sam's story will be next. Reviews!