In Her Arms

The woman screams loudly and the doctors rush to her. She passes out.

She heard whispering in the room. It was very quiet, and she didn't open her eyes. Instead, she slipped back into that beautiful world she had been in before waking: she had her small child – her child! She struggled against the darkness that tried to lull her to sleep and finally succeeded in opening her eyes. There was a doctor in the room, and her husband sat across from her. They both had looks of intense grief on their faces, and a terrifying fear ripped through her body. "Where . . . where is . . . ?" she struggled to form the words, hardly having the energy to stay awake, let alone talk.

Her husband did not reply. "You need some sleep," the doctor finally said gently. "You'll have him later."

You'll have him later. . . . The words soothed her agitated mind and she slipped into sleep again, taking comfort in knowing her beautiful son would be in her arms soon.

"Where is he?" she asked immediately when she awoke. She felt far more rested and energetic now, she simply couldn't wait to hold her firstborn child. "Where is he?" she asked with more force at the silence. A shiver of tension ran through her body – she needed to see him, now, or she would fall apart.

"We're sorry," said the doctor. "We did all we could, but –"

Her mind went numb. Not those words, it couldn't be those words, she didn't want to hear those words, those words. "Where is he?" she said again, barely managing to keep her fear from exploding out of her.

"It was a miscarriage," said her husband's low voice. His face was in his hands and he wouldn't look at her.

"My baby," she whispered. "My child. My only child. Silent tears streamed down her face. How? Why? Why? Her husband held her tightly as she cried onto his shoulder. "My little boy," she whispered. Something inside her broke apart – how she longed to see her child alive and healthy, how she longed to raise him, see his smile, his laugh! How could this happen?

"He's with angels," her husband said softly. "He's watching over us."

She cried harder. "I want to hold him in my arms," she sobbed. "Just once. I – I wish –" Her grief was beyond words; a part of her soul had been ripped away. What would he have been like? She loved him, she loved him so much, if he only had a chance, she knew he would have grown into an amazing man. Why did he have to leave so soon? Her only child. . .

The wind whispered to her she sat in the forest. Its whispers were comforting, and a small tear escaped from her eyes and trickled down her cheek. Who would he have been now? She missed him so much. . . He was gone too soon.