Holy. Shrimptoast! I can't believe this much time has gone by since I finished Green Eyes! I honestly meant to start this right after that one was finished, but, well, I got sidetracked. Then a few months ago I started writing it, but somehow I lost the document :/ Dunno how that happened, but whatever. So I started this anew this morning, and viola! Here we are at chapter one of Golden Eyes.
WARNING! You MUST read Green Eyes first. Otherwise I doubt this will really make any sense. I'm currently changing Green Eyes into a het story so I can maybe one day publish it, but for now, it stays slash.
Anyway, wow. I used to know where I was going with this but I lose all my notes :/ So bear with me for a bit, yeah? Oh and I promise there will be more action in chapter 2. This was basically just seeing what's happened since Green Eyes, feelings, etc. This will also probably be shorter than Green Eyes.
Oh and there will be a summary for this story on my profile, whenever I get around to putting it up ;)
Sequel to Green Eyes
Warnings: This story contains violent content, torture, prejudices, blood, cursing, and of course slash M/M. If this is not your glass of pineapple juice, then put the cup down and go find something else. Rated T for now but I'm not saying it won't change.
If Cayden looked closely enough, he could almost see stars in the night sky. If he listened hard enough, he could almost hear his past whispering to him like an echo roaring through his head. And if he closed his eyes hard enough, he could almost believe this was all a dream.
But no matter how much he willed or listened or squinted, when he opened up his eyes, the image - the illusion that everything was okay - would shatter and broken shards of reality would slam into him all over again. Because it didn't matter if he wanted something to be there when he opened his eyes. It didn't matter if he needed that something to be there. It wasn't going to happen no matter how hard he tried, how much he wanted or needed…
Because either way, on this day, it had been two months. Two long months since that fateful night when confusion and despair set in - when guilt and self-hatred began gnawing away at him like a leech. Two long months since he'd felt right and complete…since he felt whole.
Now he felt like an incomplete shell, a poor facsimile of what he used to be and how he used to feel. No matter how much he wished things could go back to how they were before, he knew, deep down, that they never would.
Because Soren was-
No. No, he wasn't going to think about that. Thoughts of dark auburn hair and bright green eyes were a mere memory now, tarnished with little flashes of red dribbling down the side of a pale, freckled face or seeping through a shirt. Memories of laughter were fading like little echoes bouncing through his head. Sometimes he could hear them - then they'd vanish. Memories of soothing words, a gentle hand on his ankle, an astonishing warmth seeping through him like a welcome inferno in his blood…
It was all fading. All disappearing, slithering away to parts of his mind he couldn't reach. Echoes of laughter would disperse. Thoughts of supple lips against his almost felt like they'd never happened because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't remember what that pressure had felt like, two mouths against each other in a gentle, warm kiss. Remnants of a deep voice saying his name were few and far between - slipping away like sand in a sieve. No matter how hard he reached out, tried to hold onto those thoughts and remnants of a better time, they slid through his fingers and disappeared.
It was all leaving.
And it'd only been two months.
Cayden hated to think of what it would be like in two more months. Would he eventually forget all about it? Forget everything? Would he forget feeling happy and safe?
He didn't want to…but he'd forgotten stuff before. The only reason the Green Eye had bothered to help in the first place was because he was wounded in the Abyss, a giant crater-like indent in the ground where the Green Eyes lived. Why he'd been in the Abyss, Cayden hadn't remembered at first, but slowly, it had dawned on him what Vayde must have done for him to go running there and tripping down the hill.
He'd forgotten then - would he forget this now?
He didn't want to forget. A part of him did, wanted to forget all the pain and the silence…but a much larger part of him felt cheated at how much he'd already forgotten.
He startled when a hand landed on his shoulder. Ripped from his thoughts, he spun to find Lex watching him with a weak little smile.
"Hey, Cay," Lex murmured. Cayden brushed his grip off with a scowl.
"What do you want? And don't call me that," the Blue Eye muttered.
Lex's hazel eyes watched him as his hand dropped to his side. "Dinner's ready."
"You need to eat."
Lex sighed. "Cayden…you haven't eaten in two days."
"Still not hungry."
Lex adopted an annoyed scowl. "If you don't eat, you won't be well enough to travel, and we really need to get a move on. We've already stayed here too long as it is."
"We've been here a week."
"Exactly - that's too long when you're being hunted," Lex pointed out, and then went quiet for a moment. The somber silence stretched around them like an elastic band, until it finally snapped and gave way. "Look…I know you're hurting. We all are, you know? He was our friend, too. But we have to keep going, okay? So you need to eat. You don't have to eat a lot, just…" Lex ran his fingers through his shaggy brown hair and tugged at the strands in frustration. "Just eat a little, okay? Some? Can you do that for me?"
Cayden glared at him momentarily before he sighed and stood from his perch on a small hill, where he'd been watching the sunset. He figured Lex wouldn't leave him alone until he ate something, and it was just so much easier to pretend everything was okay when no one was there to watch him and remind him of what was missing.
Who was missing.
So he followed Lex back into the hotel they were staying at for the time being. "What's for dinner?" Cayden asked quietly. He didn't really care, but if he did know, he would know how much to eat of it before Lex was satisfied.
Really, the thought of food made his stomach churn. He really wasn't hungry.
He wasn't sure he was anything at the moment.
Very, very tired.
"Got some food from the dining area," Lex replied. "Cheeseburgers."
Cayden grunted. Great. Now he'd have to eat an entire cheeseburger for Lex to be satisfied.
"After you're done eating, get a good night's sleep, okay?" Lex continued as they walked down a hallway toward their rooms. Marcus and Russ were sharing a room and he and Lex were sharing a room, despite the fact Cayden wanted to be alone. No one seemed to understand that. Gabriel and Annie were with them at first, but they'd branched off about two weeks ago. They were all going to meet up sometime later, but Cayden didn't know where or when.
Cayden grunted in response.
"We're all going to leave at dawn."
He didn't ask where.
It didn't really matter because no matter where he went, Cayden would never find what he was looking for.
Who he was looking for.
Cayden first met him when he'd wandered into the Abyss, on the run from Vayde. He still didn't have all of his memories back, but he was pretty damn sure his mind had blocked those thoughts and images to protect him. Once in the Abyss, he had literally stumbled into Cayden. The Green Eye had been harsh at first, and when two other Green Eyes approached and starting pummeling Cayden, the Blue Eye had thought all was lost and he was going to actually die for a reason he didn't understand.
But of course, he had changed all of that.
Soren. Soren had changed all of that.
The name hurt to think about. It hurt to remember and each time he so much as thought the name, the name that sparked to life inside his head, he felt nothing but a blinding pain he didn't understand and couldn't identify. It was like there was this raw, gaping hole somewhere inside him, and no matter how hard the tried to find it, he couldn't. No matter how hard he tried to fill that empty space up, it never worked.
It was just there - gaping, raw, and unwanted. An agonizing reminder of what he'd lost.
Sure, he and the Green Eye had gotten off on a wrong start, but in time, Soren had come around and Cayden had to admit there had been a certain…spark between almost as soon as they'd gotten out of the Abyss. Soren had joined him, being hunted by his own kind because of his one little choice to help Cayden escape death. He'd been cast aside like he was nothing, a disposable fraction of an unknown equation.
And to the outside world - beyond the Abyss - Soren was still cast aside. Still hunted both night and day simply because of the color of his eyes. Cayden couldn't understand why the Eyes judged the way they did, or who decided the 'pecking order' or who to hate. He just knew what he'd been told - how horrible Green Eyes were, how they were practically demons with a fiery attitude. Of course, after Soren had saved him, Cayden hadn't been able to see how anyone could think them evil. Well, okay - maybe he could see how others would think those other two Green Eyes were evil, but not Soren.
Lex snored loudly from where he was sleeping in the other bed. They'd booked a double room because, while Cayden knew it was less expensive to get a single room, he just couldn't let himself sleep next to anyone. He just wanted to be left alone.
Was that so much to ask?
Apparently it was.
Soren… he thought despairingly. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
He knew it was his fault Soren was gone. He was the reason Soren was killed. Sure, he may not have held the blade, but it was his fault, his doing, just the same. He could see the chain of events so clearly in his mind now, looking back.
From the beginning, they'd been doomed - him and Soren.
If Cayden had never gone into the Abyss, he wouldn't have amnesia and Soren wouldn't have stumbled across him. If Cayden had told Soren to leave when they were at Lex's, they never would have been caught and that violet blade - a blade Cayden had never seen but Lex and Soren were afraid of it - never would have been used against them as a weapon of fear and mental anguish. If he hadn't…
Well, if he hadn't done a lot of things, this never would have happened. He wouldn't be standing here now, waiting for something, for someone, that was never going to come, no matter how much he tried to will the person back into his life like some forgotten fragments of the best dream he'd ever had.
And if he hadn't told Soren to stop when the Green Eye had been about to kill Vayde…
"Soren! No! Don't!"
Three simple words and everything had gone to hell, because Soren had, of course, looked up at his name which gave Vayde a chance to escape and become the victor of that horrible fight to the death.
"Soren! Look out!"
His fault Soren had died. His fault Soren was gone and wasn't here with him now. His fault Soren was buried in the ground outside some nameless city, behind Steven's house.
And they'd all just left him there, under a mound of dirt with Steven and Manic - Steven's dog - as unlikely company.
It all just made Cayden sick to his stomach.
It was all his fault.
They left the hotel first thing in the morning. Dawn's first rays of sunlight beckoned them into the dew-filled, moist air. Lex looked around and watched as Cayden walked at the back of their little group - which consisted of him, his father, Cayden, and Marcus. There used to be one more, but…well, Soren was dead and thinking about it wasn't going to help anyone - no matter how much the thought still haunted him.
He and the Green Eye hadn't gotten off on the right foot. Lex openly admitted he was an ass to Soren when they'd first met. He'd judged him for being a Green Eye, sinking into a society-instilled hatred for the color. He himself was a Hazel Eye, and while at least allowed to exist with other Eyes, he was still judged pretty harshly, mostly because to become a Hazel Eye, one of the parents had to be a Green Eye - and of course, to most of the Eyes, Green Eyes were the bane of their existence.
He'd been ashamed at how quickly he'd fallen into those prejudices.
Thankfully, though, he'd learned to get over it and had started to actually like Soren. While they hadn't really known each other that long - even though the time between them meeting and Soren's death felt like decades - Lex had really come to at least respect the Green Eye, and he thought they became friends toward the end…at least, that was what he liked to think. Soren had never been particularly rude to him after he'd accepted the Green Eye as a person and not just some facsimile of a fiery beast hell-bent on ravaging the world with leviathan flames in a swarming inferno.
Soren wasn't like that.
But of course, it didn't really matter now, did it?
Soren was dead and they were still being hunted by the White Eyes.
Lex still couldn't believe there was actually such a thing as a White Eye. When he'd first heard about them, he'd thought it was a pretty awful joke because it made Vayde and his people seem…more…invincible, if he were to use that word.
White Eyes, while Lex wasn't exactly sure of all the details of how they were created, were those who had captured them the first time, back at Lex's house. They'd taken them to a compound out in the middle of nowhere and had taken to torturing Lex and Soren, while Cayden…well, Lex didn't know much about Cayden's stay there. He only knew the Blue Eye hadn't been harmed like they had.
Apparently, White Eyes could choose any color they wanted - and would get their abilities. That would explain why Vayde seemed so strong, really. And the other Eyes. Vayde was working on building an army of White Eyes to…well, Lex didn't really know what his big plan was, but he was pretty damn sure it wasn't anything even remotely good.
It was Vayde, after all.
While Lex hadn't been there to actually see the Green Eye's death, a distraught Cayden had blubbered a few sentences, most of the words incoherent but Lex had at least been able to hear the words 'Soren', 'Vayde', 'knife', and 'dead'.
After seeing everyone return except Soren…it had been pretty dam obvious what had happened. However, they'd gotten Soren's body - and using that terminology sounded horrible, but he couldn't think of that shell as Soren anymore - and had buried him outside Steven's house.
Steven was an older Brown Eye with a hyperactive dog named Manic. They'd stumbled upon the man after they'd escaped from the compound the first time. At first, Steven had no idea Lex and Soren were there, as Soren had this unique ability to pretty much 'smoke' over Lex, like some kind of invisible shield.
Of course, Steven had eventually found out they were there and shot Soren….accidentally, but still. Afterward, he'd been pretty nice to them for the most part - still as grizzled as ever, but no longer out to kill the 'Green Eye'.
Lex was just happy he'd agreed to let them bury Soren behind his house. It was probably the safest place for the body right now, plus Steven didn't mind that he was a Green Eye - anymore.
Of course, convincing Cayden of that was another matter entirely…
Speaking of the Blue Eye…
"Are you okay?" He lightly prodded Cayden's shoulder to catch his attention.
Cayden barely looked at him, mostly keeping his gaze firmly focused on the ground as they walked. "I'm fine."
Lex sighed. He wished Cayden would talk to him, but he couldn't make the Blue Eye do anything.
"Are you sure?"
Cayden grunted in response. Great. Even less of a response this time.
They were all hurting - after all, Soren had become a friend to them, and someone to be respected - but Lex knew Cayden was hurting most of all. The two of those idiots had been courting each other for a while. It started with little hidden looks, perhaps a subtle smile on their lips, but either way one looked at it, they really cared about each other.
And now Soren was dead and Cayden was alone.
If that didn't suck…Lex wasn't sure what did.
Yeahhh so, as you can see, lots of narrative and I am more into dialogue these days, but it would have felt wrong to surround this somber chapter with dialogue, you know? But I promise it will get better :D Anyway...yes, there's the first chapter of the long-awaited sequel XD haha. Thanks for reading and please review!