A/N: All right. After looking over the original copy some twenty times, I've decided to rewrite this story. Depending on how well this goes, I'd like to enter this into the Scholastics Contest in my Creative Writing class. I will take any- and all- constructive criticism, but I will promptly ignore flames. Thank you, and please enjoy my piece :)
'Oh where is he?' She thought, wringing her small hands. 'He was supposed to be back here hours ago! What could possibly be keeping him so late?' She nervously fiddled with a loose thread on the sleeve of her plain white dress. She looked down at her ring that she'd worn so proudly since their wedding two weeks ago. It held a simple diamond. Nothing special to most, but to her it was everything.
She'd never had anything special when she lived on her mother's farm. They got by, but just barely. No money for things like jewelry or even toys for that matter. She'd often spent time playing in the fields with her dog, Maxine. They used to go on adventures through cornfields or out to the woods by the creek. In fact, that was where she'd met Henry.
One day she ventured too far into the woods with Maxine. The bloodhound had picked up a strange scent, and let out a huge bark, darting in that direction. She found a cabin with logs of wood stacked beside it, and smoke billowing from the chimney. She'd heard a grunt from behind the house. She'd slowly crept past the pile of logs, and just stopped. And stared. Boy did she have something to stare at.
Streaked by the sun, his hair, a dark chocolate brown, hung past his lightly-tanned shoulders. His violet eyes shown mischievously as he held an axe, just about to hack at a tree. His torso was bare, a scar running up his chest. She would later learn that it was from a fight with a wolf when he was younger. Maxine barked way too loudly, and bounded toward the virtual stranger.
"Max!" She'd hissed, but then she noticed how he acted with her dog. He treated her like his own: shaking her paw; scratching her behind the ear; playing fetch with her. She'd been so wrapped in watching him that she didn't notice herself leaning forward. Soon she found herself on the ground with an axe poised just above her slender neck.
"Who are you?" He'd snarled. "Who told you I live here? Was it Samael? I swear I will sever his limbs if it was."
"No one! I was just curious! And, I saw how you w-were w-with my dog Maxine. Please do not kill me!" She'd whimpered, closing her eyes. After a few minutes, she felt something slobbering all over her face. She opened her eyes to see Maxine sitting in front of her.
"No one with a dog that sweet could be pure evil," She'd heard him say. What is your name?"
Since that day they'd hung out by the creek together every day. As friends. Until their wedding day. She hurriedly glanced out the window. She'd heard, through the gossips in town, that there was a vampire loose. She only half believed it, but it was still enough to make her afraid for her husband. She took her white bonnet off, revealing her long dirty blonde hair. She grabbed a ribbon the color of blood, hastily tying her hair into a neat bun. Henry always said that he liked it best like that.
She suddenly heard a pounding at the door. She started toward it, but then hesitated. What if it was the vampire? What if it was if it was her nemesis Josephine? What if it was that creepy man from the market; the one who was always looking at her bust while talking to her?
She quickly shook those thoughts away. Who else would show up at this hour but her loving Henry? No one would come at the hour while there was a chance of a vampire being in these woods. With trembling fingers, she reached for the brass doorknob. She did not turn it, though. The pounding came again, harder this time. "Victoria, open up! It is coming after me!" She heard Henry's voice through the door.
She turned the knob with inhuman speed, and yanked the door open. Her husband's face did not show a trace of fear or desperation. In fact, he was smiling, showing off his teeth. Two canine-like incisors protruded from his lips. His skin was as pale as a freshly-cleaned sheet. His eyes were the color of her ribbon, if not a little darker.
Horrified, she started backing away from him. Henry smiled wider, happily accepting the challenge. Each time she took a step, he took one to match it until she backed herself into a wall. "Henry, no!" She whimpered as he sniffed at her neck like some feral animal. "Please do not do this!"
He took the ribbon out of her hair. He gently stroked it, and murmured in her ear something that would seal her fate, "You smell so… so good, Victoria."
He swiftly sank his fangs into her neck, savoring the intoxicating liquid that was her blood. Victoria let out a blood-curdling scream that the next town over must have heard. She felt her very essence fading as he slowly drained her of every last drop. With her very last breath, she whispered his name. One more silent plight that no one would ever hear. One more cry that Henry- the new Henry-would not acknowledge as he drank his fill.
He laid her body on the floor beside the end table. "Goodbye, my beautiful wife," He muttered as he placed the ribbon on the bodice of her dress. He slowly stood, and left her without a second glance.
All right. There's the prologue. Please review!