Book 39 • Entry 65

Book 39 • Entry 65

War. Such a small word that's always been an abstract in my mind... Only made up of three letters, just like cat, or red, or mom; but behind those three letters lies a meaning that is devastating to even the things it doesn't directly touch. Cat means feline, sly and sneaky, and is devastating when it feels threatened and lunges, gouging your eyes out. Red is the color of blood flowing through brazen hearts, and is devastating when we see the glowing embers in the pit of our soul reach up to the back of our eyes when we are enraged. Mom is the love and affection that every being is given unconditionally. I never had a mom, but I've been told that's what it's like, and it's devastating when she doesn't give that love and affection at all.

And what does war mean? Hurt, without comfort. Loss, without warning. Carnage, without reason. War is an abyss of spiraling darkness that will either swallow you into a fractured state of mind, or drag you through the mud and toss you head-first into the great, fat pit of death. I've never been on the field of war myself; slinging out bowls of slop to these grunts does that to a man, but I've seen enough bodies coming in and I've heard enough in the mess hall to imagine the screams of a man being torn apart. I've heard enough to be able to imagine the way his wife and kids cry in his memory, and I can very easilyimagine the victory cry from the enemy when another one of our guys are killed. I can imagine the sounds, but I can't imagine the eternal damage it causes, and I can't imagine how a man must feel to have his existence hated for no other reason but because it can be.

I always asked my pappy; "if it's so easy to kill another man, why do soldiers need to go through training?"

He always gave me the same answer, word for word; "because, son—it's easier to validate the killing of another man when you're shooting your gun to the sound of war trumpets."

War. Never realized something so small could have so much meaning... Why does war have to exist?

Signing,

Silva Gasket

Equinox 4th Day Era 187