I finally got the courage
to put you in jail.
But you left your mark on me
without any fail.

Now you're in jail,
and I don't know what to do.
I have a major problem
because of you.

I now know for sure,
it's no longer a maybe.
Because of you,
I'm going to have a baby.

I think it's called incest,
is that right?
I'll never forget
that horrible night.

I don't know if I can handle
another abortion.
This whole mess
is truly a distortion.

I'm only fourteen,
and pregnant with my second child.
Both of those children were because
your hormones were running wild.

I couldn't fight you off,
and so I was raped.
I couldn't scream for help
because my mouth was taped.

I couldn't move,
and I didn't dare try.
I just let myself get raped,
let myself cry.

But now you're in jail,
and I have a baby on the way.
I don't know if I can take this
one more goddamn day.

I can't do drugs,
I can't drink.
This fucking child
is sending me off the brink.

That night still
runs through my head.
I remember the disgusting things
you had said.

I was perfect,
but I was still a whore.
I was terrible,
yet you wanted more.

I was amazing,
but I was bad.
I made you happy,
yet I made you sad.

I made you hit your high,
but I still made you fall.
I was so thoughtful,
but didn't care at all.

I consented to this,
I said it was alright.
I gave you permission
to rape me that night.

I still feel your hands
burning holes through my skin,
I still feel your hands
forcing me to give in.

I still see your face,
smell the booze on your breath,
I still see the needle
as you injected me with Meth.

It was for my own good,
you would say.
It would make it
easier this way.

I still taste your
disgusting taste,
I still remember
your hands holding my waist.

I'll never forget
the night I was raped.
Especially since
it was videotaped.

And now I'll have a child
as a constant reminder of that night,
a constant reminder that I failed
to put up a fight.

I'm fourteen years old
and having my second child.
It's all because I didn't call sooner
and I let him run wild.