What the hell happened to you? You used to be so much fun back when you were 95. Then you aged to 98 and that was okay, I could handle 98. Then you had your identity crises…I guess we all have them. You couldn't decide on your name: XP, Millennium, 2000...Whatever.
And that was okay for some time, then you couldn't decide what you were and became Vista! WTF? Man what are you smoking? Vista? Where the hell were you when you thought that one up? The Congo?
Then you became Windows 7 and have remained so even though your friend Linux is beating the crap out of you. I understand you changing your name again to Windows 8 in the near future.
I know, it's been rough on you, always getting exposed to viruses and such. But come one…Changing your name again? Another feel good upgrade? Listen, you can wall paper this anyway you want but you're still having an identity crises. Windows, I'm sorry to say….But you need an intervention.