sometimes your anger scares me.

not in the way you imagine -
you aren't dangerous; i wouldn't
ever fear that. you've never hurt me,
and i know you never will.

but i remember the day you hit the board
and swore. you didn't know i saw you.

i walked away, nauseous. because
i don't want you to change, to become
the beast i've been running from.

what i'm saying: even though i have no valid reason,
even though you're kind and gentle and patient,
your humanity is enough to make me bite my lip
and hide, my stomach swimming.

even though you're everything i've ever dreamed,
sometimes your anger scares me.