a/n: i actually quite like this one. written sort of for a friend, but never given to them. now for anyone who's ever felt this. also, i feel i should mention that the title is somewhat taken from this wonderful poem here: s/2214067/1/ , though mine was written more about self-destructive behaviour than gender.


she can feel it. sneaking

up on her.

it's barely noticeable

at first.


it's more obvious.

she notices patterns

in her own behaviour. patterns

which don't belong to her.

and then

they do.

they become hers.

rituals, compulsions.


they are her.

no longer hers,

but her. taking

her over.

the patterns may leave,

but she will never be complete