Shit. Taking weight training class had been the worst idea… ever.
Ethan dodged into the shower stall, trying to forget the sight he now got to see every day. A naked Brent.
Ethan suppressed a groan, half of frustration, the other half paired with the semi hard on he was now sporting. He had maybe five minutes to 'shower' before passing period started.
He cupped himself tentatively, making the splitting decision of taking care of this now, like he wanted to, or living with it for the next few hours of school. Chatter and locker slamming reminded Ethan that he had yet to actually turn the shower water on.
He turned the nob and set it on close to scalding. Fuck it. Today he almost wanted to say he didn't care. Ethan wrapped a hand around his shaft, stroking it to fully hard in a few seconds. He let his eyes drift shut and got Brent in his head again.
That muscular body of a sports player that Ethan could never seem to reach. Ethan could only imagine the power and drive of his legs and hips, His cock jumped and his ass twitched, and Ethan reached back with his other hand to press a finger over his ass hole.
He fought back another groan and tightened the hand on his shaft. He tugged and pulled, stuck between trying to not be caught and trying to get off. His legs quivered, but he was too focused on reaching an end now. It felt incredible, and all he wanted was more of it.
Ethan grazed his thumb over the head a few times, trying to get just that extra bit. He felt his balls tighten and his body tensing up. He let out a strained breath, trying to keep his voice down as he released over the tiled walls of the school showers.
His legs shook and his vision was blurred for a few moments before he started to recover. He wanted to bask in it, but there was no time. He cleaned up his mess, wrapped a towel around his waist, and turned off the water. He bolted from the shower and towards his locker and clothes.
He stole another look at Brent, who didn't even spare a glance, of course. He was too busy talking to one of his friends.
Ethan sighed and started to redress. Maybe he should just drop the class? If anything, it was just an added stress. To jerk off in the showers, or not to jerk off? That, was the question. And fuck, he had a Shakespeare test next period!
He pulled up his pants quickly, and tightened his belt. He hated being skinny sometimes—no clothes ever fit him. He wasn't skin and bones or anything, he was just lean. He had wiry muscle, but nothing like the sports jocks did. And while he was building up strength in this class, he certainly wasn't bulking up. Another reason he should maybe drop it.
The start of passing bell rang, and Ethan bolted from the locker room—ahead of Brent, sadly. Again, not like he noticed.
Ethan was just average. Decent height, but he wasn't tall. He was only five foot ten inches, with straight and thin light brown hair and green eyes. Nothing like the blond hair, blue eyed wonder that Brent was.
Ethan really needed to drop that class.
He biffed his way through most of his Shakespeare test the next period, since he hadn't done the reading. Maybe it would help since he had seen some of the movies? Probably not. Just like everything in his life didn't go his way, really.
Brent probably wasn't even possible. Ethan wasn't sure what the deal with him was, anyways. Brent was hot, yes, but all Ethan could ever think about with that was sex. He didn't imagine cuddling or anything a normal relationship should have. Maybe that's another part that was just messed up.
Brent was just some wet dream—nothing serious.
By the end of the day, Ethan just wanted to go home and sit at his computer. Maybe watch some porn, or flirt with guys over the internet. Something that made him feel less pathetic about Brent. Like that would happen any time soon.
At least it was Friday night, and he had the whole weekend to be anti-social. He also had the whole weekend with nowhere important to be. Some of his friends were going to a late night movie, but he hadn't been interested.
He ate dinner with his mother before going up to his room and setting up in front of his desk top. He cruised his normal sights, replying to a few of the messages from some guy's that seemed to have a thing for him. Ethan wasn't really interested, though. He wanted some emotional part of a relationship, but he needed something physical to go with it.
The night seemed to wear on slowly, and Ethan's mother went to bed. Ethan twirled in his desk chair, feeling useless and sluggish. He wanted to sleep, but he wasn't tired. He could stay on the computer, but he wasn't doing anything attention grabbing.
He needed out. He crept out of his room and downstairs to the front door. He slipped out and inhaled the crisp night air. A walk would probably do him some good, even if it was eleven at night. It was a Friday, who cared?
Ethan dug his hands into the pockets of his straight leg jeans and hunched his shoulders. Maybe it was a little chilly, but that was because it was fall. He kept to walking along the sidewalk and street lights, admiring how different the neighborhood looked late at night.
He couldn't see the details of everything, and the shadows were kind of creepy… but nothing exciting ever happened there. Ethan just sucked in another deep breath and tried to shake the lethargic feeling. He walked straight for a few blocks, debating hanging out at a small park for a little while. He hadn't been on a swing in forever.
A car flew by him though, much faster than the twenty mile an hour speed limit. Ethan jumped and watched it angrily as it turned up another street and parked in front of a house. It was one of many cars that crowded the street, he realized. With the loud music, lights, and people at the house… it was a party.
Ethan admired it for a while, wondering about all those crazy party movies he'd seen. Rumor had it they weren't actually that crazy, but he'd never been to a party to figure it out. Maybe this was it?
Ethan approached carefully, as he obviously hadn't been invited. He recognized a few faces here and there from school, so that eased his nerves. He wasn't a complete stranger then. He bumped shoulders on his way in. There was a cloud in the air, and some horrible smell he didn't like but couldn't figure out what it was.
There was a beer keg set up in the corner, but no one seemed to be guzzling it. A few people seemed over the top drunk, but not everyone. Some were just pretending they could dance, others were sitting around talking. Ethan felt a little bit disappointed.
But wait… there was Brent. Ethan felt himself go into overdrive, but he had to tell himself to calm down. No, nothing was happening. Brent was busy talking with some girl and his friends. Ethan wasn't even supposed to be there, if anyone even noticed.
Ethan sighed and turned away. He eyed the keg of beer, which he'd never actually ever tried. He poured himself a small amount, sipped at it, and immediately cringed. He didn't like the taste, at all. He tossed the cup and began to debate going home.
He looked around him one last time, feeling awkward. How sad was it, that even as a high school senior, he had never experienced anything that was supposed to be socially normal? He only went out with friends maybe once a month, if that.
It was a bit depressing, he decided. Maybe he should stay, but then what? He didn't know anyone, and he probably looked like an idiot. He decided to explore for a few minutes, and then yes, he would go home. Ethan made the trek upstairs, where that bad smell was even worse.
There was only one closed door, and the rest were all open. Ethan poked his head into the bathroom, wondering if there would be the drunk puking their guts out over the toilet, but it was uneventfully empty. Man, the movies played everything up. It wasn't fair.
Ethan was about to duck back out and go back down stairs, but he felt himself bump into someone. Before he could even say sorry, something wrapped over his eyes and he was pushed forward. Ethan swore and stumbled, almost fell, but a strong hand caught him by the arm.
Was that the close and lock of the bathroom door? Ethan turned and tried to get whatever that was off his face, but those hands grabbed at him again. "Stop," a voice commanded, a low rumble. "I'm not going to hurt you or anything."
Ethan didn't answer. He was freaking out and trying not to show it. He could hear his heart hammering in his ears, and he swallowed hard. Maybe this had been a really bad idea.
"What are you even doing here?" the voice asked.
Well, that made Ethan feel great. Not. "I-I live nearby," he stuttered angrily. "I went for a walk."
"This time of night?" The voice probed.
Ethan refused to answer and just made sure to frown. His hands were still being held down at his sides.
"Relax," the voice soothed, maybe sounding a bit annoyed. "Are you drunk?"
"No," Ethan spat angrily. He'd only had a sip.
"Are you gay?" Was the next question. That made Ethan stall in answering. How had this gone from how he ended up at a party to his sexual orientation? "You are, right?" the guy pressed.
"What the fuck does it matter?" Ethan growled. He tried to get his hands free, but it didn't work. He was getting scared now. Was he going to get beat up for being gay? He clenched his hands to try and keep them from shaking.
"I am, too," the voice murmured. "So calm down. I'm not going to hurt you." His hands tightened over Ethan's.
"Says the guy that blind folded me," Ethan returned bitterly.
"I'm not out," the guy explained. "I'm far from it. I just don't want you to know who I am. If I let your hands go, will you promise not to take it off?"
Ethan pursed his lips. Still, this wasn't exactly a good situation. He could see anything, couldn't tell if anything was about to happen until it might be too late and he couldn't stop it.
"If I trust you not to try and look at me, will you trust me just a little bit when I let your hands go?" the guy rephrased. "I'm not going to do anything you don't want."
"Fine," Ethan hissed, trying to keep his voice firm, trying not to let his nervousness show through.
The grip on his hands disappeared, and he heard what was probably the intentional shuffle of feet just a little bit away from him. There wasn't much room in the bathroom for space.
"So what do you want with me?" Ethan asked.
"I don't know, to talk," the guy replied. "I noticed you when you got here. Figured this is probably my only chance outside of school."
He wasn't really making it easy. There were probably a hundred people here, and of course, were all from the same school. There was no way to narrow down who he was. That was probably the point.
"Do your friends know you're gay? What about your family?" His voice wavered slightly.
Ethan started to calm down a little bit. This could be considered a normal conversation, right? Well, blindfold aside. Just one gay guy trying to console in another. "My friends, not really," Ethan admitted. "I mean I'm not really close enough with any of them. I'm sure they would be fine with it, but it's not that important and it hasn't come up."
"What about your parents?" the guy stressed.
"My mom knows, I'm sure. I didn't tell her, but I dropped some pretty obvious hints. 'don't you think he's hot too, mom?' and so on." Ethan wanted to hide. He probably wasn't being too helpful—no courageous story about how his friends all knew and supported, no tear-jerking coming out story of acceptance to his mother.
"But I mean, people are different," Ethan tried to correct it. Apparently he was the more seasoned gay guy here. He could be a letdown. "If they don't openly hate, that's a good sign. And then maybe just probe. Bring up politics of it; see if they state their opinion." These were all ideas that Ethan had gotten from a few coming out forums that he had never used.
"I was just asking," the guy chuckled slightly. "I'm not out, but that's my own choice, not because I'm afraid of rejection or anything. I'm only trying to have a conversation."
"With me blindfolded," Ethan pointed out. "Kinda hard to think you don't have some motive here."
"Alright," he cleared his throat. "I am interested in you, yes, but again, I'm not going to do anything you don't want to do. I'll just settle for talking right now, since I doubt you trust me for anything more."
"I'm not exactly in a position to say no to anything," Ethan snapped, some of that fear clawing its way back up his throat. "I probably couldn't stop you from doing anything to me."
He sighed. He stepped closer, and Ethan tensed up. A hand cupped the side of his face. "I know this probably isn't the best approach here," the guy explained. "And I'll admit, I've had a beer or two myself, and maybe a few hits of marijuana,"
"Is that what that smoke smell is?" Ethan asked, scrunching up his nose.
A faint laugh. "Yes, I'm sure your parents are proud. You hate beer and you don't even know the smell of weed."
Ethan wasn't sure if he was being made fun of or not, and he didn't quite like it. And the guy had been watching him enough to see him toss the beer earlier.
"And as I was saying, this probably isn't the best approach, but it's really the only one I can come up with without you seeing who I am."
"You don't trust me?" Ethan decided to throw some of that back in his face.
"I have trust issues, yes. But not with you. Are you going to make me out as a bad guy for just wanting one person who I can be myself with?"
Well, shit. Now that made Ethan feel guilty. That was probably the point. He didn't know if he liked it.
The hand on his face slid down and around the back off his neck. "If you want me to go away, I'll respect that. But please be serious about it, not just because you're not sure." His breath landed on Ethan's face, and before he could stop it, lips pressed over his. They pulled back just as quickly, though. "I want to build something with you, Ethan. What, is up to you. But you can always tell me no." Another kiss, lasting a few seconds this time. "Okay?"
Ethan swallowed hard. It was a risk, but… trust was seeming to play a part. Could he trust this guy? Maybe. He could get burned too, though. But then all he had to do was take off the blindfold. And the fact he could do that, was an act of trust extended towards him. "Fine," Ethan agreed reluctantly.
The lips pressed back over his, and he could have sworn he felt a smile. Ethan awkwardly returned the kiss, trying not to let his inexperience shine. It wasn't his first kiss, but it was one of few. Very few. And even less, to the point of microscopic, had had tongue involve.
This one was escalating with tongue. It felt weird, but it felt good at the same time. Ethan tentatively slid a hand up the guy's shoulder and around his neck and up into short hair. He was muscled. Ethan tried to quell that little bit of panic in his stomach, to push away the thought that he was vulnerable.
Ethan gasped when he felt himself being pulled closer, his body being pressed hard up against the other. He was solid and warm. It felt good. The jean clad hard-on pressing into his hip was a little awkward though. This was sadly the limit of Ethan's experience.
Ethan pulled back to catch his breath for a moment, but… "stop."
To his credit, the guy did. He pulled his hands off and took a step back, leaving Ethan to sway slightly in uncertainty. A firm hand landed on his shoulder though, giving him a sense of place again. "You okay?" he asked.
"Fine. That was just… as far as I'm willing to go." Right now, anyways. Who knew. He still wasn't too sure about this.
"Okay," he sounded a little bit disappointed, but he didn't pressure it. "Will you see me Monday evening?"
Ethan had nothing better to do. He had the computer. "I don't know." He could pretend to be busy.
The guy sighed. "Alright. Can I have your cell phone number, then? I can text you."
Ethan nodded and gave over his number. The guy did the same and put his number into Ethan's phone. "I'm in there as Unknown." The guy explained and put the phone back into the palm of Ethan's hand. "I'll talk to you when I talk to you."
The door unlocked, and he seemed to be gone. Ethan took off his blind fold, feeling slightly stupid. He tucked what turned out to be a shirt into his pocket, and went back downstairs. No one seemed out of place or paying special attention to him.
What had just happened?