Innocent

Melanie has always been dating different types of boys. Some were one year her junior or ten years her senior; some were kind, charming and gentle; some were straight, rough, and demanding; some treated her with sincerity; some treat her as though she was a game. She didn't mind them, as she wasn't that picky nor she wasn't that desperate; she had the urge to satisfy the need to find the perfect man. But somehow she cannot accomplish that with the man of her preferred 'taste'.

Somehow, walking with the man of her opposite taste while holding a broken bouquet of flowers given by him made her feel different. Like a warm fuzzy feeling was swelling up inside as she looked at the gap between them. The sensations of urge, awkwardness, and happiness were begging to her like a firefly that she wants reach but at the same time feels terrified for the knowledge of it being temporarily; the light would eventually go out, and she would found herself finding somewhere deep and dark as she never felt before, the feeling of sadness would be swarming up to her if that event would ever occur.

But for the meantime, she wants to savior the moment on being with him. Walking with him. Looking at him. Being beside him. Looking away from him. Feeling awkward around him and being happy with him.

Usually around this moment, her former boyfriends would touch her as they walk. Melanie couldn't remember or hardly ever felt of reaching out to a boyfriend and touch him, let alone hold hands, hug or kiss them. Touching was something that a boy should start, and then she would participate. She was never the one to participate such an activity.

Yet right now, Melanie found herself having those sensations once more. Telling her on not to be afraid and trust those sensations. Melanie found out for the first time that she wants to bridge a gap between them and hold his hand. It was a terrifying thought like the first, thinking that he would pull away or not participate with her. However, Melanie knew that he would take that invitation that she's offering and would complete the bridge between the two.

In telling her that he would lover her, that he would treasure her, David had awakened something in Melanie. It was a hope, of some sorts, that David would be the one who want's to be with her because she was herself, and not for the kiss, the touch and her pretty looks.

But when they do kiss, it would be…special. She doesn't need fireworks or sparkles or a lovely sunset like those cheesy romance dramas her grandmother watches. But to feel her pulse race, to feel his pulse racing too, and to that with that kiss, they were starting something new, exciting and awkward- the first kiss that she never had.

A gentle touch startle Melanie out of her thoughts, and her head jerked around to see him. David was half-smiling- not the usual smirk or the happy-go-luck smile he usual grins; he's nervous, Melanie realized, and all at once her heart leapt into her throat and realized that she was nervous as well.

Letting him grab her hand gently and wrapped it around. Melanie shifted her grip on the flowers so she would be holding it in one hand, and let her other hand fall into his. They were gently bridging the gap between them as David's smile slightly widens a bit; it was hopeful look on his face; he was happy, that made Melanie happy to, but she had to look away for the fear that all this blushing might catch her face on fire or give her a very awkward nose bleed that might ruin the whole scenery.

David was not forcing her to look back at him after she looked away, he didn't even weave his fingers around hers like her former boyfriends usually do; he was simply holding her hand in his, and in turn, Melanie wrapped her fingers around his for the first time. Melanie knew that touch she never experienced before felt so innocent or so intimate would keep her face ablaze. But the touch between their hands felt so gentle, so soft, that when it breaks, she will feel sad and will long it for some more.

They soon arrived at Melanie's house. Seeing her older sister was still having her party. Melanie turned to David, their hands were still together, and they smiled.

"Thank you… for everything." Her voice sounded odd- maybe a little shaken and higher than usual?

"Not at all- Thank you," said David, his voice seemed a little high-pitched and less confident than usual too. His face was red as well, but his eyes were on hers; Melanie was holding his gaze despite the need to look away from him.

"I… Thank you", he repeated, and his eyes started looking away from her face to their hands. "For giving me a chance. For… giving me everything."

Melanie was still looking up towards him. Loss for words for a moment before biting her cheek, wondering where all the sense in the world had vanished too as snow gentle started falling on them.

"Can I…maybe see you tomorrow?" David asked quietly. "I know you have plans, but-"

"I don't," said Melanie, wondering if her heart had beaten this fast before or her face had ever felt this warm before? "I'd love to."

"Great!" David smiled. Back to his usual-happy-go-lucky grin that suddenly wiped her mind blank for a moment. The only thing that could keep her anchored to reality was that usual smile of his redden face. "So can I come and pick you up around… maybe at two?"

"That sounds… wonderful," said Melanie. Feeling her own smile that suddenly felt different-softer.

"I'm looking forward to it," Said David.

"Me too", Melanie spoke; it practically sounded like a whisper.

There was a moment of silence. A moment of snow flakes dropping on them. David cleared his throat. "Well, then…" He squeezed her hand. "Good Night!"

Then suddenly, he dropped her hand and stepped back with a softer smile. As though he was intended to stand there and watch until she was inside.

"Good night," Melanie replied and walked over to the front door. She only looked back once when she was inside and closing the door; David was still watching, face still red and was covering his mouth with his hand. She kept the door open just a crack and watched as David's gaze dropped to his shoes. He put down his hand and placed both of them into his jean pockets. Cleared his throat before turning and walked away.

Melanie closed the door all the way and turned around to lean on it. Ignoring the partygoers as she leaned on the door. She wondered how long would it take to really see David.