Tales from the Portly Geese

Goose 1: Well, I think it's about time to migrate...

Goose 2: Bloody hell!-All that work for nothing!

Goose 3: Yeah!-Why don't we just stay here, chill out, and make the most of it?

Goose 1: Now see here!-We're got to migrate! It's what we geese do! Besides, the humans expect it.

Goose 2: Well, who died, and made the humans king?

Goose 1: I rather think that they do that king-thing themselves...you know, the "Crown of Creation" stuff, and all that...

Goose 3: Well, I didn't vote for a king!

Goose1: You don't vote for kings! They rule by divine right!

Goose 2: Well, that's a deal of a note!

Goose 3: How do I get out of this chicken shit outfit?

Goose 1: Aha, but you see, we are geese!

Goose 2: So who decides then that it's time to migrate?

Goose 1: Why, we all do! We kind of share a type of group awareness.

Goose 3: So what are we, the freakin' Borg Collective?

Goose 2: Hey, when's "Star Trek: The Next Generation" on, anyways?

Goose 3: I can't stand Will Wheaton!

Goose 1: Geese, geese! It's time to hit the wing! We've all gotten a bit fat during these long good summer months!

Goose 2: Hey, didn't "Elizabeth Barrett Boring" or someone write "Tales of the Portly Geese?"

Goose 1: That's "Portuguese," and it was Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

Goose 2: Whatever...

Goose 3: Alright, let's flap our wings! I'm tired of hearing Goose 1 flap his gums...

Goose 1: But my dear boy, geese don't have gums...

Goose 3: Here's a quarter...go call someone who cares!

Goose 2: I'm out of here...but I'm gonna poop on some humans as I fly over 'em!

Goose 3: You might start with the guy who wrote this drek...

Goose1: Wouldn't that be redundant?

Geese 2 & 3: -SHUT UP! (all fly off)