A/N...Most of you know I talk about having a child. You don't always believe me or you say nasty things to me, but I would like to set a few things straight. I didn't tell you guys earlier about my beautiful son because I knew it would cause controversy and you might look down on me, or think badly of my father. It took a lot of guts for me to tell you my story, so here it is...
Me and Levi, the story of a pre teen mum and her baby.
I was only eight years old when Levi was born, and let me tell you, everyone wanted me to give him up. They said I was too young, that I would not be able to handle being a mom, and that it was not fair on Levi.
I have to tell you, I seriously thought about adopting him out. I mean, I was only eight. I was just a kid myself. How could I be a mom, how could I give Levi all the things that a child deserves, that a child needs?
I didn't have to think too long. Every time I thought of letting him go my heart just broke. I couldn't imagine life without him, and I couldn't imagine how he would feel growing up knowing his mother gave him away.
I was so scared bringing him home from the hospital that first day. In the hospital you have the nurses and the midwives, they all help you, they show you how to change diapers, whet to do when your baby cries and you don't know what's wrong, they teach you to bath and feed your child.
They actually have special classes for pre teen mom's that you go to, where they teach you all this stuff, and then they support you while you are in the hospital.
But going home that first day, just me, my dad and Levi? Man, that was so scary!
I did not need to worry, though. My dad is fantastic, he knew what to do and he helped me heaps. And my precious Levi was a really, really good baby.
He slept when he was supposed to. He ate when he needed to and thought baths were great, he smiled and cooed and splashed when I bathed him.
I was tired, and it was hard, especially when I had to go back to school!
My caregiver is wonderful with children, so I didn't hve to worry about leaving my son with her. But that first day back at school, only a month after I had him, well, I am not ashamed to say I cried pretty much the whole day!
Things were hard, I couldn't just come home and chillax in front of the TV any more. I had to take over from the moment I got in the door, feeding, changing diapers, bathing, as well as do my chores and my homework. Yup, it was hard!
Slowly things fell into a routine. I got up early to attend to my son, l and get ready for school. I tried to just be a kid while I was at school, just concentrate on the day there. I knew I needed a good education if I was going to provide for my boy in the future. When I got home I took over from the caregiver and spent all my time with Levi until he went to bed, then I would do my home work and spend a little time with my dad, if he wasn't away working.
It was mostly good, but sometimes I would get too tired and very emotional. I hated leaving my son when I went to school, but summer camp was coming up, and I couldn't take a baby with me!
One day my dad sat me down and had a good, long talk to me. He explained how hard it was for him when he went away working, how he had to leave me, sometimes for months at a time, while he was in Canada or somewhere, filming a TV show or a movie.
He told me how much it hurt to leave me and how sad he was every day not to see me, but that he knew I was safe with my caregiver, that she was a wonderful woman who really put my needs first and made sure I was happy. And that she would do the same for Levi.
He also told me as sad as I get, he gets twice as sad, as not only does he have to leave his little girl, but he has to leave his grandson as well!
Well, that did make me feel a little better. I was sad, it was okay to be sad, but I could cling to the knowledge that Levi would be well looked after with someone who loved him and he was familiar with.
Camp was fun and dad was right to send me there. He knew that I was only a child myself, and still needed time out to do kid things every now and then.
I might have made this decision to be a parent, but as my parent my dad would always find the right way to make my life better.
And in giving me a break from my son, you know, I think it makes me a better parent.
Other moms, I'm sure, would agree with me!
Well, Levi grew quickly, as all children do, and pretty soon was walking and talking, running off on me when I tried to change him, playing funny games, and learning heaps. Every day is hard, but it is worth it.
I think the hardest thing I have to go through is the judgement of people that do not know me. People think that they can tell me what to do, or how to live, or that I should give up my son to adults to raise.
They tell me my father is not a good parent for letting me have a child. They think my father is Levi's father, and I am pretending.
Seriously? He didn't let me.
He found himself in this situation, just like I did, and showed what an amazing parent he is by supporting me one hundred percent!
And then, people tell me I am a liar. They look at me funny when I go out with my boy, or they think I am babysitting him, that he is not mine. They think my father is Levi's father, and I am pretending to be his mom.
They tell me I have an 'active imagination'!
I have to admit, I actually cried the first time someone said this to me. I had just had a very, very long day.
School had been hell (I sometimes get bullied for being a pre-teen mom) and Levi was teething.
Everyone who has ever had a child knows the constant crying, diaper rash, and niggly sadness that little boys go through when they are teething, I swear Levi hadn't slept more than five minutes at a time in the previous five days.
It took me ages this day to rock my little monster to sleep, my arms aching, my heart and head hurting, finally, after what seemed like hours, I got him into a bed where he was restless, but sleeping, and I sat down at my computer to do my home work.
Then, I get on line to find people telling me I am a liar, that I have no son? Are you kidding me?
People don't know how a carless word can wound. They don't realize that you may be in a position where you just can't listen to that kind of rubbish, and that it hurts.
It really, really hurts.
That's why I decided to write this little story. I just wanted to give people a little insight into what it's like being a pre teen mom.
I am so glad I made the decision to keep my son. I regret nothing.
It is hard, and most days I swear I'm asleep before my head hits the pillow! At least Levi sleeps through the night now, that does make life a little easier.
Would I do it again? Well... that's something for my next story!
A/N... yes, I had help writing my story. I have my friend who is a writer and she helps me. I would also like reviews, you can post them only if you log in, and don't forget, I'm only eleven, please keep that in mind with your comments!
Note from UCAT42 : This story is as true as all of Maddie's other stories on this site. If in doubt...please don't forget what this site is called. It's not amazingtruestories dot com or autobiography dot com. It's FICTIONpress dot com .
Maddie is a wonderful, intelligent, creative child and her stories are an adventure we can all enjoy.