Wonder Reader,

My sister has finally come back from the hospital. When we, my family and I, would visit her at the hospital she would just sit there with needles in her arm and stickers on her chest. Seeing her there made me realize the truth. My sister is dead. My sister killer herself and is dead and a mindless, soul-less, and empty vessel has taken her place. She stays in my brothers because it is closer to my parent's room and the carpet is still stained with blood. Nobody has the courage to clean it. My mother tries but she ends up crying till she collapses every time she gets near the room. A social worker must come every Sunday now to check on us. The man says he is trying to find us a good home. I never knew my home was bad Reader. My home is just misunderstood. I would not want to be in a new family. They would not understand my travesty I project unto paper. What if someone saw this!? Would they crucify me? I will sit in my home till it burns down. Only when things are destroyed can one see the skeleton it wishes to show everyone.

My brother now has to sleep in my room. Tonight will be his first night. I can no longer lock my door to stop him from opening it. When my brother heard of the new sleeping arrangement he did not speak to me and has not since. A has not talked to me in a couple of days either. So I wrote him a message on ;

Dear A,

I have not heard from you. I looked out my window to see the sun set. The moon came and lit itself upon an empty path. I then wondered, one cannot have day and night without the sun. You know, birds fall into the ocean and fish fly out the sea. This is not odd. I guess this relationship is what it comes to be also. It is not odd either nor would it have lasted. I am not saying good-bye but another meeting time. I cannot silence you any longer and you have probably found love. Good-bye…good-bye and I love you. I love you so much that you must go away. Do not come back because you cannot. The wind only blows with me and not against.

Sincerely,

R

We did not even go all the way. One day, but tonight I sleep with my brother, tomorrow I cry of my loneliness, and the day after I will hopefully awaken alive or pain free.

With Love,

R