I remember you scally-wag talked your
Fucking words at her, just about as sweet
As ejaculate-salt. I remember you writing her things.
A thick, squidgy, pungent lump
Like a first menstrual clot grew in my
Very Virgin mouth when I recognised
I could not recognise what words you had said months before
To the girl that came first.

I knew that us girls were alike.
I wondered what you would have liked her to do –
Spread for you, pleading, fantasising, her rubyfruit glinting
In your crow's eye?
I thought of you thinking, for days and days and days
Until you slipped me your placebo kiss.
It was only later that I wondered if there was any
Detail I had too casually dismissed? What
Had you said?

I could not remember and it tortured me,
The second girl, who had told the first girl to leave you be
Because she found your large, metal-soul teeth too
Grim, found your lips too soft,
Imagined your dick to be thin –
Only as thick as a lollypop stick. What, man?
I'm telling it like it is. I worried you loved me for her
When I noticed people swapping our names, it took the piss.

You fell for me second,
When you lost your footing while following the first girl,
So I thought. So I obsessed.

It was a while afterwards that I realised, as your tears
Made a landslide for feelings on your face,
That chronology defined almost nothing at all,
But a clinical system to eliminate doubt.


A/N: Oh, woe is me! Haha, please give feedback :)