One day, a deer was taking a drink from a pond when suddenly, a bunch of rednecks and Karl Malone shows up armed with assault rifles originated from Russia. Before the deer could make its move, the men open fire at the deer and in the end, all what was left is a pile of goo.

"This is awesome, is there another animal to shoot?" one asked.

"I hope so Terry, I'm still pissed at how I could have ride the bench for the Spurs in 2005 and get that ring, I need to kill something!" Karl Malone yelled.

But then, the ghost of Charlton Heston shows up and said, "I saw a group of kids planning to shoot up the school, follow me!"

Without questioning on the fact that the star of the movie Ben Hur have inexplicably appeared out of nowhere, the men agreed and follows the ghost.

"Hey Tony, I heard you used to bully people, just don't let your personal feelings get in the way, okay?"

Tony Grave nods and said, "I won't, besides, those guys are bullied victims most of the time so...YEAH!" as he fires his AK-47 into the air, shooting down much of the passing flock of geese.

As the NRA made their way to the school, they heard a gunshot and Karl Malone motions the members to storm into action.




And so the NRA went in and starts a "heroic bloodshed" as they braved a flock of doves to start mowing down some teenagers who were trying to escape because of a misunderstanding. After pumping several clips into a wheelchair bound fat kid, Tony sighed and said, "Those guys aren't tough, what a bunch of wannabes!"

Karl Malone wipes the sweat off his brow and said, "Maybe we shot the wrong kids, I think they were trying to escape from the carnage."

Everyone stood in silence until another gunshot was heard.


As the group headed toward where the gunshot was heard, they saw an emo looking kid holding a hostage.

"Stay back or this girl gets it!" he demanded.

Karl Malone shoots the hostage before taking out a hand gun and puts a bullet into the hostage taker's head with a single shot.

"Karl, you did it with one hand like Chow Yun-Fat, that's awesome!"

The former NBA star smiled and said, "Thanks Arnie."


"Let's split up!"


The NRA splits up and later did their job shooting the school shooters (along with several innocent bystanders as well). Once it was over, the members each left through the back entrance so they won't get caught when Karl Malone notice something in the sky.

"Hey guys, I saw something flying..." he said.

They all looked up and saw a giant mecha with a mustache sporting a pair of energy wings followed by destruction. To each of their horrors, they tried to run but it doesn't matter, after less than an hour, the entire world's population was wipe out.