Sorry sister

I don't like her. She doesn't like me. She gets drunk with her friends and I get sunshine patches. It was easy to killer. If I could talk I'd say I killed on third degree murder but I can't. My older sister is sixteen, she is a slut, whore, gets drunk and has been in the hospital three times in the last year. I love my sister, I really do, and that's why I put her to sleep. I only wanted an older sister like my friends have. A year ago I was given another sister and I promised I'd be the best big sister ever. That's why the oldest had to leave.

My sister would call me mean names like, bitch. One morning I woke up without my voice, I loved it so much, so I ran to tell mommy and daddy but they couldn't understand my happiness. From then I have been speechless. My sister laughed in my facing telling me I'll never have a golden voice like hers. I smiled and pulled her hair, she screamed and tackled me. Our parents came as she was ready to hit me and I cried silently. She got grounded.

Every day was the same she would try to hit, get drunk and call me a bitch and again and again day after day. My parents had enough but gave her chances and have to new baby I knew what I had to do. I had planned it perfectly.

We were eating dinner together as a family. She had asked me question but I didn't answer. She pushed me out of my chair so I stabbed her hand with my fork. The days came and left as her friends came to visit and whisper about me. With her over acting that she'll never do anything again I put many crushed pills into her apple juice, gave it to her and then went to my baby sister. Before going to bed that I night I did the same thing, many pills.

I waited until the house went silent, liking the movies I've been watching I put up my hair and put gloves on. Grabbed a knife and went into her room. It's not the cleanest, mostly filled with bottles of beer.

She woke up gagged and held a pillow over her face until she stopped moving. Next was the part I had to do. Putting knife in her heart… but like I said it was easy. I had used her dead hand to stabbed, pulled it out and put a bottled of beer in her other hand.

She had put too many pills in her drinks, drunk and stabbed herself. Only if she was like me: a good silent girl.

Her body being pulled away this morning had made me cry as I held the baby. I was going to be good big sister, I had told my little sister. She is only a year old, she will not understand like me. Suicide is what everyone agreed on not the nine year old sister. Truly I am sorry, will miss her face every day but it was best for all of us.