Promises

I scribbled our names into the ground

and held up my soiled hand to the sky, closer to

the sun than god. Your kisses were blessings

that landed on my lips, my neck, another's

heart

and I can't sleep, can't think, can't

get you out of my head. Feel this cold sweat that

drowns me in the night, sliding around

my throat with each of my thrashing, spasm-like movements

Promises. You promised me more than this,

promised me love, a life, light in

the dark night but now I know I was just a

fuck

Somehow I find you, alone and

your harder than rock, metallic, robot,

systematic excuses, lies

I find a stone and smash it across

your face, you fall and

I do it again

and again and again

until I see grey matter, staining the ground like gold