I Can't Sleep

Every night since "it" happened,

I can't sleep without my music.

I don't know why,

But it's like something possesses me.

Last night I tried to go without,

But when I turned off my lights,

Lay on my bed,

And closed my drooping eyes,

It was like something was holding me down.

Pushing me onto the bed,

I could hardly move.

My head began to pound,

And when it felt like I was in another universe,

My ears were closed off,

Unable to hear anything.

Well…

Anything but the sound of her screaming in pain.

Suddenly, I felt like I was falling forward,

Just like when "it" happened.

I wanted to move,

But it was like I was frozen in shock.

For five minutes I lay there,

Hearing her screams,

But I couldn't move.

Finally, after a long wait,

I was free from the bonds,

But I was still scared.

Grabbing my phone,

I flipped through until I found the right tune,

But nothing could get me out of my nightmare.

I live through it all every single day…

When I go to school…

When I go home…

Even when I am alone…

People tell us that we are lucky,

That we have our life,

But I don't see it that way.

HE took her talent,

HE took a part of his personality,

HE took my piece of mind…

I can't look at her without wincing at her scars.

I can't joke around with him like we use to.

I can't sleep without having to hear her screams…