Hansel & Gretel

Once upon a time . . .

Deep in a forest as dark as the deepest sea dwelled an evil witch who lived in a house made of nothing but candy and pure sugar, only a decoy of course, but you can't blame one for trying; now could you? Every now and then, a child would get lost in the woods, or banished from home, and would stumble upon what would seem like to them, a blessing from above. Little did they know, what waited for them inside those gingerbread doors was nothing like heaven whatsoever. Outside these secret-holding woods stood yet another house, only of innocent souls, however.

The old monstrous hag was extremely nominal, for she was known only as "The evil candy-luring, kid-eating witch". But, none of the lost, penury-stricken children ever lived to tell the tale. Only minuscule rumors were spread by huntsmen who claimed to have passed by a place of children's wildest dreams. Saying that each time he passed, a strong waft of burnt flesh and sugar floated about the breeze; rudely assaulting his nose as he stopped to survey the scene. Yet, he never saw a single person or child, nor bird or squirrel. And, with such a paucity of proof, who was to believe him?

Those who occupied this house were a father and mother, and two young children by the names of Hansel and Gretel. The mother was only but a stepmother, and a parsimoniousone at that. Hansel and Gretel's real mother had died immediately after giving birth. Hansel and Gretel were born into a family whose frugality was included in everything they did. In fact, there wasn't a single thing they could do without being reminded of the fact that their cows had more than they did. But father often reminded them all that "although we may not be rich in money, we are extremely rich in love"; usually sighing inaudibly to himself, weary heart weighed down by grief; wanting only the very best for his family.

There was a prodigious dearth that consumed all of the entire land, causing any living person or animal to be as good as dead, these were frugaltimes you see, and the father and mother knew that they were digging graves for not only themselves, but also their children. They had to do something, oh this they were quite aware of. However, they were not aware of the secret that Hansel and Gretel shared between one another. As the full moon drew nearer with each and every passing night, Hansel and Gretel became more and more anxious. They were often caught furiously whispering back and forth, and when any one was to enter the room, the conversation seemed to cease immediately. The father could not understand this strange behavior of course, and when approached about this, they denied everything, acting as if he really was insane for asking.

"Do you think she'll notice if we're a day late?"

"We won't be late!"

"And she's not stupid, of course she'll notice!"

"We'll leave tonight, at midnight when the moon is brightest and at its highest point."


At the day's end, when Hansel and Gretel were positive that their father and mother were asleep, they crawled out their window and stole away into the night. After a long while, they came upon their destination and hurriedly knocked on the door.

"Who is there?"

"It is Hansel and Gretel."

The door quickly opened and the old hag yanked them inside.

"We are ready when you are, master."

"Well, tonight is the full moon, and your parents are well asleep, correct?"

"They were when we left."

"Yes, yes. Tonight will be the night."

"Follow me."

The two children and the witch disappeared around the corner. The old woman pulled out a brick in the wall in the pantry room and the door swung open to reveal a room filled with a glorious amount of weapons.

"Alright! Now this is what I'm talking about!" called out Gretel.

"All of these have my name written all over them." replied Hansel in an awestruck voice.

"Now, now children. You know the rules; we only use what we need."


Though kind, and both the teacher and the provider of all their materials, the old hag had an air to her ways; she was definitely a woman of did she reveal all her teachings and knowledge.

A proud yet hungrily greedy look stormed over the witches eyes.

"You might need this, this, and of course, this."

She grabbed an assortment of items off of the wall (all miniature sized) including (but not limited to):

A meat cleaver, a bunch of butcher knives, a chainsaw, a bow with poison covered arrows, and a machete. The group of three disappeared into the back room to discuss their strategies.

Not before long, Hansel and Gretel set back home with weapons in hand, and accompanied by the old hag, following behind. The witch made a few hand motions, and her accomplices nodded. Hansel covered the front door, Gretel the bedroom, and the witch the roof. Sneaking quietly into her parent's bedroom, Gretel took out a small bag of fire-opal colored powder and sprinkled it over her sleeping father and step mother. Their sleeping bodies floated slowly up to the ceiling and she took out four large meat cleavers, nailing their bodies to the ceiling. A loud, audible "Shing!" echoed throughout the room and blood poured down on her like a shower of their love, soaking her completely head to toe.

It was difficult for Gretel to be able to accept the heartbreaking attrition of family members as easily as her brother had; but they had to go.