If I knew that embrace
was going to be our last,
I would have held you tighter,
even though you'll laugh and say,
"hey, it hurts, let go already."
If I knew that as you walked into that train
leaving in another direction,
and that smile you had on your face
was going to be the final one I'll see,
I would have breathed in all of you,
took it all in so it'd last a lifetime.
I can't stand the idea of waking up
to the days I won't be able to spend with you.
I didn't want to lose you, I didn't want to live without you,
and I spent nights and hours just missing you.
I… don't know what I can do but just
feel it in my bones the absence of you.
This suffocating feeling is
killing me, I don't want to feel anymore and
it's terrible, urgh, it's horrible—!
I hate that I can't reach you even though
you were right there in my memories.
You're gone and not coming back,
it hurts so much, much worse than anything else!
It burns, it freezes, it chokes me on my own breath.
It kills me so deeply, it stabs me right here.
I hate the feeling of you gone,
I hate it so much almost like I'm hating me
for hurting you and hurting me!
I hurt so much.
I don't know how, why…
I can do
to make it stop, I…
I still love you.