i don't know the sound of my own footsteps
have always planned a moment too late
a breath behind-

i am continually falling
in love with the same girl;
reanimating her, a desperate cpr
my lips to her blue ones
pushing useless air into her paper bag lungs
certain that this time i'll hear her gasp
and draw open those baby browns.

my mother used to tell me
that love keeps you alive,
on your toes
it's a battle she's been determined to win
but this love of mine,
she prayed to the moon and wove lullabies
because my pacing never ceases
and when she laid her hand on my chest
she didn't feel an anxious thrumming
but a constant highway tide
swarming through my body.