she sat and
snapped a rubber
band against her skin,
just to feel the pain and know
that she was alive.
when that
stopped working, she used
razor blades to slice into her flesh
and see the blood drip down, so
she could feel the evidence of
something
real. something
breathing.
when that just wasn't enough, she
used her straightener (set on full
heat) and branded lines onto her wrist to
show them how much she
cared but
they never saw.
and when everything else was
gone, when there was nothing left
to try, she went to the medicine
cabinet and found a bottle of
sleeping pills and she took
the whole thing
for herself. [selfish
girl, selfish girl]
she lay on the floor, breathing in
breathing out, looking at the scars
and burns and all and tried to sing
the words to her favorite song
but nobody ever heard her
no one heard her