Chapter 1: The Beginning of the End
"No." was the only word I whispered as I saw him passionately kissing Joana. Watching him kiss and touch her the same way he used to do it to me made my fists curl and shake in rage.
"No." I said again. I must have spoken louder because they both stopped their public display of 'affection' and turned towards me. His face paled significantly as his eyes widened at my presence. Joana was also surprised, however she simply gave me a look over before staring at me with a bored face.
"Shazz…" he started.
"How long?" I quietly asked.
"This isn't how it…"
"I said how long?!" I snapped my eyes directly at his level and stared at him. I must have appeared furious for he visibly gulped and shuffled around nervously.
"Look Shazz, this was never supposed to happen."
"What wasn't supposed to happen? You cheating on me in the first place or me finding you sticking your tongue down her throat?" I spat at him. He winced as I harshly told him reality. I regained my composure and took a deep breath before calmly asking him: "So how long?"
"Five months," he whispered, staring at the ground.
The wheels in my brain went into overdrive as my conscience put together all the pieces. My eyes widened in realization of the truth.
"So that's why you were ignoring me for all those weeks. And then during Christmas, you weren't with your cousin, you were her weren't you?" I stated as I gestured towards Joana.
His silence was all the evidence I needed. I couldn't believe it! The boy I was absolutely crazy for betrayed me, tossing me aside like rotten meat. I pressed a hand against my heart as I felt like I was going to be sick.
This is not happening! I thought.
I abruptly squeezed my eyes shut, determined to not let my tears spill in front of him. Once I was calm enough, I opened my eyes and glared at the couple with all my might.
"You have hurt me for the last time. So long you selfish bastard." With that I quickly turned towards the nearest exit.
"Shazz what!" He yelled.
"Sorry 'hun', no can do." I replied sarcastically.
"I'm sorry," he tried to beg.
"You know what? I'm sorry too." I stated as I glanced at him. He looked back, confused. "I'm sorry that I wasted my energy on trying to make you happy when you couldn't give a shit about me. Whenever I tried to help you, you pushed me away. Whenever I tried to talk to you, you would shut me out and then later say that 'I' was the one who ignored you. So guess what? I'm through with you!" I began to walk towards the door on the other side of the hall. I could hear rapid footsteps behind me as he tried to catch up.
"Shazz please! Let's talk about this." He pleaded.
I turned around and stared at him blankly.
"It's too bad we turned out this way. I was so in love with you." A lone tear streaked down my cheek as I opened the door and slammed it in his hurt face. He's the one who's hurt? What about me? I wasn't the one sneaking off with someone else behind his back!
The reminder of what he did sent a new wave of emotional pain through my core. I paused to clutch my hands against my chest. What was wrong with me? Why did he have to hurt me like this?
One by one, the tears fell down like mini raindrops until they poured out like a waterfall. I slid down the wall and cried out in agony. That bastard! How could he do this to me?! I covered my face with my arms as I continued to release my frustration. Eventually, the tears ran out and I was left there feeling empty and broken. My eyes stared blankly at the checkerboard tiles, randomly counting the number of black and white tiles. Feeling restless, I got up and decided to go to the one person who has never let me down.
Pushing myself off the floor, I hastily attempted to make myself presentable before running out the main campus doors. Ten minutes later, I arrived at my true sanctuary. I knocked on the door two times before my favorite person in the whole world opened it. She seemed surprised to see me there.
"Shazz? What's wrong?" She asked curiously.
All the tears and emotions came rushing out as I hugged my sister tightly as I said "I can't believe he did it." She let out a sharp breath, mumbling something about 'kicking his small ass back to Europe', but brought me inside and led me to the couch. We both sat down and she soothed me by gently running her fingers through my curls. I sniffled briefly before staring at her loving blue eyes.
"Shazz," she started gently. "How about you rest, then you can tell me the whole story tomorrow?"
I couldn't have agreed more, though I was too tired to say anything. I settled myself comfortably on her couch as Felrain brought a warm blanket and covered me with it. She bent down and kissed my forehead before dimming the lights and going to the kitchen.
It took me a while to fall asleep, even though I was psychologically exhausted. The image of him and Joana kissing was forever imprinted into my mind, even as I finally managed to enter the dark abyss of dreams.