Under my skin
In my veins
With warm crimson blood
Run the pieces of my heart
That cant be collected
Or understood.
Like waves
Some emotions can overtake me,
Fill my body to the brim
With angry anxiety
Refusing to subside.
Stinging like venom
Under the snow white skin
The pains of this world
Compete to surface,
Turning into faint white lines
Softly humming of desperation.
Prying eyes become angry
With the prominent red rivers
Flowing over the cold soft skin.
But they don't feel that anxiety
Reaching the heart like a sedative
Or white hot poison.
Just stop.
Because I cant feel anything else.
I have become a vessel
For the emotions that
Are uncontrollable.
Yet I am numb
Unable to truly feel the love
And pain
That fight for attention in my heart.

Your eyes used to be soft
Looking at me with longing
And making me feel like I was
Wanted.
With chocolate irises
I felt so warm
Kissing those lips
In the cold of the night
And feeling like light
Was filling me up.
Those cursed words-
I love you
And suddenly, the magic is gone
And all that's left is the reality,
The reality of the life
That is too hard to live.

Breathing in the smoke
I feel the fire in my throat.
Warm memories of campfires
And happy embraces
Make me warm in the cold of the night.
Looking down from so high
I know that the fall
Is inevitable
And somehow
I yearn for it.
Pulsing in my veins
I feel those pieces move
Ever closer to the heart,
Their home
That is now lost.