I had arrived at school when I saw the sadness in his eyes, He collapsed into my shaken outstretched arms and began breathing out relentless gasping cries. Like a sea of forgotten anger. All of the students passing in the halls stared at us. It took me a while to haul all of his weight with me down the hall, even though he was very thin. I tried to find somewhere private, but to no avail, the school was like a fish bowl it felt like everywhere you turned there were eyes on you.
I finally decided to take him into the corner of the men's restroom. Some boys walked in, not noticing at first that there was a girl in the men's room, But when they did they quickly gave us a look of confusion that turned to shock and then into 'not-going-to-even-go-there-i'm-leaving'. Jake told me everything about how his mother died. He told me that it was sudden, That the doctors didn't catch her cancer in time. His black mascara running down his face in hot watery globs. When he noticed I was staring he looked up from the floor and I took him by the shoulders, looked him into his navy rimmed eyes and said too him with so much confidence that I even scared myself, "Everything will be okay, I'll help you through this Jake, We will get through this together."
He wiped his under eye free of running makeup, and ran his finger along his black skinny jeans, The mascara adjusting to the color of his pants. He looked at me with such intensity I had to let my eyes stray for a moment he whispered, "forever?" I was confused, so I asked, "What do you mean 'forever'?" He announced smoldering "Oh, You know what I mean..." Jake then took me by the waist and gently pushed me up against the cold door of the bathroom entrance. He cupped his hand around the back of my neck and rest his thumb along my jaw line. While he was moving in for a kiss, I realized something...this was all I had ever wanted. I had always wanted Jake to love me, I always subconsciously dreamt of me and my best friend-Jake-being together like this.
He pressed his lips passionately against mine. His lips were warm and full. Then it hit me like a blow to the head, WAIT, JAKE WAS GAY! And just like that it was like he read my mind, he said, "I'm not, well...not anymore..I relized you are all that I have ever wanted..." He scanned my face for any readable sign as to tell him to 'stop'. There was no sign. In response to his shocking statement all that I could come up with came out in a whisper, "Perfect." I leaned in and molded my lips around his, It was like they fit there all along. A silent map harshly calling for me. I tasted his salty tears on his lips, And hoped he wasn't just running from the fact that he had just lost his mom. I wished, and hoped, and prayed that this dream could live on and into tomorrow and forever.
We stood there for what felt like hours just kissing each other to the invisible music, We made up for lost time. This felt like the most right choice I had made in a long time. Right, whole, and true. Between those moments that I wished could stand still, I managed to breath, "forever." I could tell he was grinning, his teeth hit my lips. "I love you." "I love you too" I said. I was numb and knew I had to get to class... I couldn't force myself to though, I couldn't move, and so i stayed...for once in my life i didn't care about the consequences.