I thought of you today.
I cried and I even thought to call
For the first time in almost a year.
I don't know why when I looked in the mirror today
I saw you looking back .
Maybe it's the bitter chill in the air
Or perhaps the frigid rain pelting upon my roof
That makes me remember the day
It all went down.
Annika, for so long
I've kept what happened between us
Sealed deep within my mind;
Hidden and and unheard of
From everyone, including myself.
But today every memory
I've ever had of you came flooding back to me
Like water releasing from a cloud.
I couldn't stop them.
The tears I've kept concealed
For all these months
-They finally came.
Suddenly I remember every single
Secret I ever told you.
Every second of laughter I've ever shared
With you beside me.
I remember it.
And that's why my tears continue to flow.
Because no matter how much I long
For those moments to still be here...
After all the hurtful things we did to each other
It seems impossible to rekindle the friendship we lost.
So Annika, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I haven't even cried a single, solitary
Tear over you until now.
Because you're worth so much more than that.
You have to understand:
I was scared.
You were turning into someone
I no longer knew
And quite honestly,
I wasn't sure if I truly wanted
To know the person you were turning into or not.
You became a stranger to me
And I was afraid.
I said things I didn't mean,
And as a cause of that I got my answer.
I don't know you anymore!
You're a complete stranger to me now
And for that reason I am very, very sorry.
Annika, I miss you.
And if it were in my power
I would reverse time.
I'd go back and rewrite
Everything from the very
Firt moment I ever doubted your sincerity.
Yes, I would go back to the nights
Where I would text you at midnight
Without a second thought.
I'd live again the days we'd talk
For hours on end.
Annika, I'd do anything to have
Your friendship again.
So please forgive me.
Give me a second chance.
I love you no matter what may have happened
And I'm willing to do whatever
It takes to make sure it doesn't happen again.
So Annika, let me in.
I beg of you,
Let me be your friend.