Hello, God

Do You remember me?

It's been a while

But things are falling apart at the seams

And although I feel petty and pathetic

Waiting for so long to come crawling back

I cannot deny that to my victories you deserve credit

So here I go, to lay it all out

I'm glad you don't get bored

Because it's going to a take a while to say what this is about

My home life is a mess, and I feel completely useless

Others ask for my help, and I ask, "Why are you asking me?"

I've been told I'm compassionate an perhaps a bit foolish

But if they knew my dour thoughts like You do... Oh Lord, I need You

Things are so much worse

Than the last time I prayed

My dad, the burned-out pastor

Is beginning to crumble like clay

My mom, I love her, I really do

After all, she knows me almost the best

Second only to You

But as of late she's succumbed

To the numbing of her brain

With things not necessarily sinful unless abused

And these things are making her rather sulky and mundane

My sister, so soft like dough

Impressionable and formed by the Baker's hands

Was left in our care and protection

I don't want her to hurt even though

I feel like I'm decaying inside

And now, Lord, I'll bring the topic to me

Who can only be heard through pencil and paper

And stands out about as much as a mellow color scheme

My friends I'm allowing to drop away

As I wander further and farther away from my own sanity

And ever day

I get knocked down, never trying to get back up

I take the hurt, the criticism, the lashings

Boys touch, girls whisper,

And yet, throughout it all, You shine

A beacon of hope in torrents of icy despair

But, Father, I'm so weary of trying

To find You through these thronging crowds

I catch of glimpse of Your glory

Only to have it snatched away and in dejection I drown

So I'll ask once more, if only for consolation

Do You really see me?

Do You really love me?

Is there a way to make You proud?

I want to be seen

But not by the crowd

That miserable, blind crowd

But by You

Father, Savior, Almighty

Oh, God, show me the truth

I want to learn to love You