Chapter 9 - The Final Problem Of Sir Boast-A-Lot And The Story-Teller

Hello. Are you ready for the story? This is the story of Sir Boast-a-lot. Sir Boast-a-lot was the bravest and cleverest knight at the round table, but soon the other knights began to grow tired of his stories about how brave he was and how many dragons he'd slain, and some of them began to wonder, "Are Sir Boast-a-lot's stories even true?" Oh no. So, one of the knights went to King Arthur and said, "I don't believe Sir Boast-a-lot's stories. He's just a big, old liar who makes things up to make himself look good." And then, even the king began to wonder, but that wasn't the end of Sir Boast-a-lot's problems. No. That wasn't the final problem...

Ah ah ah ah staying alive, staying alive. That's the problem, isn't it? Staying alive. That's Sherlock's problem, he's still alive. Not for much longer though.

It's been several weeks since I last worked on this... story of my life. I've had quite a wonderful fortnight with one Mycroft Holmes and his cronies we like to call the British Government. It was really quite lovely, we stayed up late, chatted, swapped several stories, it was like a two week long slumber party.

Let's see, what else have I done? Broken into the Tower of London, organised a break out at Pentonville, opened the vault at the Bank of England, all in a days work. I even went to trial for apparently trying to steal the crown jewels. Please. If I'd wanted them, I'd have them. I was just having some fun. And it's been fun, let me tell you. But now, for my final problem; Sherlock Holmes. What's my solution? Get Sherlock.


Once again, it's been a few days since I've last written anything. I've been on the run. I know, right? Me, James Moriarty, master criminal, on the run. Don't worry though, fans of mine, I wasn't running from the authorities. No, I was running from Sherlock, for fun. Have you ever heard of a children's TV show host called Richard Brooke? Of course you haven't, why would you? Don't worry, you haven't missed anything, you'll know soon enough who he is. Everyone will know soon enough, thanks to Sherlock.


Speak of the devil, and he shall text you;

Come and play. Bart's Hospital rooftop. SH.
P.S Got something of yours you might want back.


Excuse me, my dears. I appear to have a date with a dear friend.

Final Note
James Moriarty (1978 - 2012)

I found this, among many other items, at the address in which one James Moriarty resided. Please forward to Detective Lestrade. Yours faithfully, a friend.

P.S - Greg, tell John, he was right. Being an annoying dick all the time really did have a down side. It took a true friend to make me realise it, too late it seems.


To my readers: Thank you so much for reading this far, I sincerely hope you have enjoyed my little attempt at Sherlock fan-fiction. Anyone familiar with the current BBC series will know that this story was heavily influenced by that, and if you did read all of this, you're probably as big a Sherlock fan as I am! I'd like however, just to quickly make a couple pointers.

No. 1) This was written as part of a University project, and although I have attempted to clean it up as much as possible for use on FictionPress, there may be a few errors here and there (spelling etc.) and I would greatly appreciate it if you could point them out to me so that I can rectify them. (Also FictionPress - for whatever reason - likes to erase certain symbols such as speech marks and apostrophes so if you happen to notice speech with no speech marks, please note that this is FictionPress's fault as I originally had punctuation in all the right places.)

No.2) There are a couple of assumptions made throughout this story, people as in love with the Sherlock BBC series as me will probably have spotted them, i.e. the final text message that Sherlock sent Moriarty about the hospital rooftop, while it is heavily implied that Sherlock sent Moriarty this text in the episode, there is no hard evidence for that fact, so this story simply assumes that that was indeed the case. There are several other assumptions like that which will sadly not be cleared up until Season 3 begins.

Anyway, wrapping this up, I'd just like to thank you once again for sticking with me during this story, I really gave it my all, and hopefully it paid off. If I've done my job right, I will have written Moriarty in such a way that it does credit to Andrew Scott's amazing performance on screen.
Cheers guys :D