So finished chapter 4, obviously its been way lesss than a week but I felt like posting so here you guys go! :)

Chapter Four

Everything felt like a dream when we headed home. Sarah sat silently next to me, obviously deciding that –in light of who I had been with- I could have a pass for ditching her. I was glad because I was enjoying thinking about Kyle to sit through a lecture.

We had sat there talking for hours until Sarah finally called over that it was time to go. I was tempted to ignore her but then I wouldn't make it home before mom got up and therefore wouldn't see him again for who knew how long. It was strange, even though he didn't tell me anything else about him the whole night, I still felt like I knew him. It was a sense of familiarity that had nothing to do with having literally known him before as much as a feeling that he understood me, or at least could understand me.

We talked about the ocean, of being fee, and having fun. Usually I would have found all that boring but with him if flowed so easily it felt…normal. I even found myself laughing until I was in tears at times over the silliest things. For the first time in a long time I actually enjoyed myself with someone other than Sarah.

When I finally had to leave I told him goodbye and faked a small smile. There was no way I could forget the way he looked at me; he stared at me for a moment with an expression I couldn't read but that took my breath away all the same before giving me a slight wave, "I'll see you around Amber." With that he went back to laying in the sand staring at the stars and I headed off to the truck, wishing for something more though I had no idea what.

We got back to my house around five-thirty and I snuck through my window. I through my flip-flops into the closet and quickly changed into some sweat pants and a baggy T-shirt before slipping into my cozy bed. Please let me see him again I prayed silently. Still grinning I rolled over and drifted off to sleep.

…","…

I woke up way before I wanted to, to the sound of my mom's voice coming from the doorway. "Morning, time to clean the house," she faked a smile at me, "and you're helping." I glared at her until she closed the door. Glroaning loudly I rolled over to fave the clock; seven forty-five. Oh wonderful, I thought begrudgingly, I get to clean the house on two hours of sleep. This'll be interesting.

A few hours later I fell onto my bed exhausted. Grabbing my phone to text Sarah I noticed a text message. I felt as if my heart stop as I read the name; Rylie. I tried to stop myself but memories flooded into my head against my will. Her red hair stood out like a flame against her pale face and light brown eyes. I could remember here smiling face at seven when we played at the park, at ten when we would go to the mall, even at fourteen when she came into my room red as a tomato asking me to keep a secret. Then my mind went to the place I hadn't let it in a long time; back not so long ago before we moved to California.

When we still lived in Virginia my best friend in the whole world was Rylie Jenkins. We did everything together and had been inseparable since first grade, and in eighth grade her and Damien started dating… I was so happy for them. It seemed like only yesterday when she walked into my room…

"Hey A, promise you won't be mad?" I looked at her like she was crazy, "Of course I won't be silly! Ha-ha what did you do this time?" Her face relaxed as she hopped up onto my bed and spilled the whole story about Damien asking her to the dance. When she was done she looked at me timidly only to be met by a huge smile and the biggest hug I could manage. "About time!" was all I said.

I would be lying to say I didn't enjoy it; the way I could be with both my favorite people at the same time and they never minded me tagging along. In fact, we did so much together, just the three of us, that it became hard to imagine it any other way. So when we lost Damien to the fire, she was right there with me. We cried together, even lost ourselves for a while together. Then, just before I moved she found herself again. She picked herself up and moved on, leaving me behind still stuck in my sadness. I knew it was wrong but I didn't want her to try and help me move on, I couldn't and didn't want to. So instead I started ignoring her.

After a minute I opened the message. Hey A, it's me… look I know you don't want to talk to me, you've made that clear, but can I at least know why? It's been over a year and I don't even know what I did… :'( Please text back soon. I miss you. ~R

I thought about replying for a minute before deleting the message. Pathetic as it may have been I wasn't ready to deal with it just yet. After throwing my phone back down I pushed myself up from the bed, choosing to ignore things a little longer by taking a hot bath. It never lasted long but it was better than nothing. Soaking in that steaming water everything felt good again and, turning up my music, I let my mind drift to the night that laid ahead.

O

That night when we pulled up at the beach Sarah just sat there; not unlocking the doors. When I gave her a look she smiled deviously, "anxious to go find what's-his-name are we?" I could feel the blush coming on and quickly looked down, "uhh… no…" I peeked up at her in time to notice her hand had gone to her hip and she was giving me 'the look'. "Okay, okay! Yeah maybe a little." I admitted. She just smiled and shook her head, "Go have fun, but not too much." My eyes grew big and she practically fell over with laughter. "Just kidding, just kidding, gosh your face was priceless!"

We walked down the beach together; smiling and waving as we went our separate ways. Looking back on the party I thought for a second how strange it was that I wasn't there (or more accurately didn't feel like I was meant to be there), but my anticipation to see Kyle overwhelmed my thoughts and I turned back toward the rocks without another thought about what I might miss.

Just like before I found him sitting in the sand doodling absently while he stared out at the waves. "Having fun there?" I asked. He jumped; looking back at me like no one had ever snuck up on him before. Needless to say I found it hilarious and broke down into a fit of laughter. He didn't say anything for a minute; instead, he just looked intently at me. "Why are you looking at me like that?" I finally asked; a little agitated. He shook his head as if coming out of a daze, "Nothing, nothing. Are you gonna sit down or what?" he pated the sand beside him and I happily took a seat.

I didn't know how much time had passed since we last spoke but I didn't really mind. Staring up at the stars in silence was nice; still there were some things I was too curious about to keep quiet any longer. "So," I began, "what do you do out here by yourself all the time? Every time I see you you're starring off in space."

"It helps me think," He looked away from the sky for a minute, glancing my way, "it's kinda my get away… you know what I mean?" He had no idea how much I felt the need for a getaway sometimes. "Maybe that seems strange…" he trailed off.

"No!" I assured him, "no, I get it. It's nice sometimes." We both looked back up; "yah…" his voice was deep and seemed to carry something I couldn't quite catch. Suddenly a very bad thought hit me, "Oh god, does that mean I'm bothering you?" I felt dread spread all through me while I waited for his reply.

"Thoroughly." He answered, sending a pain through my chest. Once again I felt completely stupid and ready to cry as I mumbled sorry and turned away to push myself up. His hand grabbed my arm, stopping me while he chuckled to himself. About that time it hit me that he was just pulling my leg. I turned back to face him and smacked his arm trying to keep my angry face in place. That didn't last long when he gave me the puppy dog eyes, "Sorry."

Even in his joking manner I could tell he meant it so I settled back down beside him. "Better be." I mumbled just loud enough for him to hear. Another soft chuckle echoed next to me. After that we went back to not talking, instead we just enjoyed each other's company, and just like every other time I was with him, I didn't think about Damien even once.


A/n: Okay so how did you guys like it? Is it going too slow? Lemme know what you think! I really wanna see some reviews before i post anymore (for real this time...unless i get bored and post anyway). Thanks.

~M.R.