[My original from Wattpad. Sorry if it is difficult to follow. Very stylized poem. At least I think it's a poem. Please read and review and tell me if it is a poem. Thank you!]

~*~*~*Circle of Despair: Who Am I?*~*~*~

The dagger pierces through me. I feel great pain.

I stare at my wound and collapse.

I can hear the cries of victory.

The powerful commander has fallen.

The war will be won.


My master will certainly die.

I will certainly die.

Yet, I feel no remorse, sorrow nor anger.

Only emptiness.


I think of all the things I have done. My life will be remembered as short and, perhaps, evil.

When I die, my corpse will surely be on display, considering the countless sins I have committed.

My weapons shall be melted and my cape burned. The ultimate signs of disrespect.

I deserve no less.


What is this red liquid I see?

Blood?

I have not seen blood since I was very young. I have never seen my own blood, to be quite honest.

My enemies are usually dead before they can lay a finger on me.


I remember my childhood. My parents were killed by the Sovereign Knights. They killed my parents brutally, but they spared me. Yet, they did not even blink twice about leaving a young child with the corpses of their parents.

I remember that being the very last time I cried.


Who am I?

Am I insignificant?

Am I pitiable?

Am I invisible?

No, none of those sound right.


After the Sovereign Knights left, my master appeared. He was kind to me. He offered to teach magic to me.

Magic?

I eagerly accepted.

Magic meant power.

Power meant revenge.

I did not see how master is an evil man. He is only a great magician with great dreams.

Or so I had thought.


Who am I?

Am I significant?

Am I special?

Am I visible?

No, none of those sound right.


Only a few years ago did he begin to wage war against the corrupt country.

I became one of his commanders.

He told me to abandon all emotion that day.

And so I did.

Anger, sorrow, pain envy.

All gone.

Happiness, joy, surprise, compassion.

All gone.

The only one I spared was loyalty. A great loyalty to my master.


It is getting difficult to breathe.

My blood is spilling all over the ground.

The once beautiful green grass was now an ugly crimson. It was trampled and had many clumps of it yanked out.

Ugly.

Absolutely ugly.


Who am I?

Am I pain?

Am I joy?

Am I invisible?

No, none of those sound right.


At the time, I did what he told me without a protest. After all, he was my saviour.

Now, I realize what he asked of, were nothing more than atrocities.

Countless innocent people were killed.

Murder, assassination, massacre, genocide.

I have committed them all.

All without remorse.


The pool of blood is getting ever so large.

I have so little time to live.

I will die within the next hour.

I do not care.

I wish to die.


Who am I?

Am I despicable?

Am I false?

Am I visible?

No, none of those sound right.


Love is something I have not experienced.

Correction: True love, is something I have not experienced.

Unrequited love is something I have experienced.

They were so fetching.

Kind eyes, a kind smile. They were everything I am not.

They despised me. They hurt me. They called me the spawn of the devil.

They are no longer with us.

They are exactly six feet beneath me.

They were so cruel.


Who am I?

Am I ugly?

Am I pretty?

Am I invisible?

No, none of those sound right.


I came in to this battle, confident in my victory.

No one could harm me.

My magic would overpower them.

If only I knew how wrong I was.


We were winning until the Great Hero came.

He wiped out my entire army.

I fell in love.

Again, it was unobtainable.

When he approached me, I could not raise my weapon.

I only constructed a hasty barrier.

It was too weak.

He stabbed me and watched me writhe in pain.


Who am I?

Am I evil?

Am I disgusting?

Am I visible?

No, none of those sound right.


My legs could no longer support me.

I fell to the ground.

I held on to abdomen. My hands were stained crimson.

He gave me a look of pure disgust.


"You foolish demon. You were manipulated. And now you have met your end."


I feel my eyes water. The rain is staining my cheeks.

Rain?

No, I am crying.

I cry as I try to speak.

No voice comes out.

He kicks me in the arm, and I nearly scream.

He is making a fool out of me.


So many emotions flood in to me.

Anger, sorrow.

Even happiness and joy.

As he walks off, I begin to laugh.

A crazy, hysterical laugh.


I do not want to die.

I want to live.

I want to see a new world.

I want to laugh and smile with someone.

I do not want to die.


I do not want to die.


Who am I?

I now know the answer.

I am myself.

I am not a marionette.

I am Laerienna Vesart.

And I do not want to die.