Wall Flower

This was the year,
I had sworn to myself,
that everything was going to change.

How stupid I was,
to hope for such a thing.

Every morning,
the same routine:
Say 'good morning',
try to start a conversation,
sit down,
and try to avoid looking at HIM.

Who is he?

The answer's simple:
the boy who broke
my heart first.

And now, only five girls this year,
in our close knit class.
More often than not,
I find myself working alone.

It's inevitable I know.
Everyone has to choose a side.
I'm just disappointed in them
because they never choose mine.

I'm slowly fading.

I can feel it,
see it even when I look,
at the unfamiliar face
in the mirror.

And what kills me the most,
is that nobody else
sees it too.

Everyday I grow:
More tired.
More withdrawn.

More alone.

I don't shine
|with that outer light
that the others rediate,
drawing people,
like moths to flame.

But if they'd just come a little closer
they'd hear my words.

See how brightly I shine.

Everyday I find more things
that drive the wedge farther
between me and my
so called "friends".

And everyday,
I open my mouth to speak,
to finally be heard,
to be recognized.

And every day,
I open my mouth to speak,
but the words,
once fresh in my mind
have vanished
along with the courage to say them.

Already I can feel myself disappearing
few see me,
but even fewer,
bother to listen.

And if something isn't done soon,
this wall flower will wither and die.

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